Recently, a 19-year old family friend moved in with us because of an intolerable family situation at home. She grew up down the street from us and she and my 18-year old daughter have been good friends off and on over the years. Last year, she supposedly fell in love with an older woman who initially seduced her against her wishes. The woman lives in another town and has basically pursued the relationship with her only when convenient. I figured it would end soon. The woman called it quits about 6 weeks ago, which sent our friend into a tailspin. I didn't realize how obsessed she was with this woman until she attempted to kill herself Monday. She drove to the junior high school where this woman teaches and swallowed a 1/2 bottle of Vicodin next to the woman's car just before classes let out. I think she intended for this woman to find her half dead when she came out and come to her rescue. Someone else found her and this woman remains absent from the hospital or anywhere else.
Sorry for all the details, but I am uncertain whether to take this girl back into my home. I have a 12-year old son and a 5-year old daughter. My oldest is off to college. I don't feel that the kids are in danger from her, but I didn't dream she would committ suicide over this woman, either. I'm sure she will continue in counseling, and she has nowhere else to go. Her mother is a very destructive person, and I think she is drinking and abusing drugs. Her father died several years ago. The extended family is a mess. If I don't take her back, I am afraid of what she might do to herself. Emotionally, I think she has a need to control something/someone in her life. Her mother is a very controlling person.
The psychologist is no help because he doesn't feel he knows her well enough to give an opinion. I'm just looking for some feedback as to what warning signs to look for to determine if she might harm anyone in my home. Also, what ground rules would you suggest I lay down if I do decide to take her back? Any help, please?