Advertisement
Thanks Thanks:  0
Likes Likes:  0
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 20

Thread: Aging Dad

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    The Land of Wheat Kings
    Posts
    754

    Aging Dad

    Hi,

    I wasn't sure where to post this one. It's about my Dad and what happens to people as they age. My Dad is 72 and a half, and for the last several years I've noticed him becoming more suspicious of people. He tends not to trust others and thinks others are out to "get him" or "take advantage of him". In his own words "Good time Charlie died long ago, nobody gives anything away for free". He makes up stories about things that happened a long time ago, though as far as he's concerned, he's right. He always seems to be on the attack. I'm beginning to wonder if this is the onset of some type of disease or is it a man with too many negative life experiences and he's just decided to err on the side of safety or am I just worrying too much?

    In addition, I've noticed the strain om my Mum recently. For the last five years or so, she has been mentioning this strange behaviour to me. I didn't really do anything, since there was nothing I could do. But she seemed really tired when I went home to visit the other weekend and I'm kind of worried about her.

    Thanks,

  2. #2

    Aging Dad

    Is your dad a drinker, Mary?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    The Land of Wheat Kings
    Posts
    754

    Aging Dad

    Yes, I would say he's a drinker. And that has crossed my mind, he probably drinks more now that he's retired and he is the type to binge drink (like father, like daughter...as my Mum always says) and this could be a source for much of his odd behaviour.

    But that seems to be a problem with many seniors, once they stop working, they start drinking. I personally think it could be a much larger problem than is thought.

  4. #4

    Aging Dad

    It may also be what's behind his increasing "paranoia".

    Perhaps a word to the family doctor about your concerns would be wise... the doctor could then make some suggestions without revealing anything about where the information came from. Of course, there's probably no way at this point to compel your father to listen to anyone...

    One of my friends recently went through something similar in her family and as the father deteriorated he eventually got to the point where the family doctor admitted him on a Form 1 (involuntary admission for a 72 hour assessment) and they were then able to detoxify him and convince him that he needed to make some changes.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    The Land of Wheat Kings
    Posts
    754

    Aging Dad

    Thanks for the advice. He lives in another city so it would be difficult to talk to his doctor, but I think I'm just making an excuse to absolve myself. I can be quite cowardly, I'm a bit of a people pleaser. I have to give it some serious thought however. Thanks again.[/quote]

  6. #6

    Aging Dad

    That's understandable, Mary.

    With my friend, no one wanted to confront the father either... until he tried to remortgage the parental home and then the kids stepped in to protect their mom.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    The Land of Wheat Kings
    Posts
    754

    Aging Dad

    Okay, I was a bit of a cop out there. But how do you even approach the family doctor, what if he doesn't believe you, what do you say exactly?

  8. #8

    Aging Dad

    You just express your concerns. He won't of course give you any information or feedback about your father in most cases but there's no breach of confidentiality in receiving information in the form of such concerns from a family member.

    For one thing, if your father is binge drinking and his competency is suffering, there is an issue about fitness to drive -- his doctor could use that as a bit of a carrot too, if that's important at all to your fathewr.

    Beyond that, unless his behavior accelerates, you may just have to wait and monitor the situation and encourage your mom to keep you posted.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    The Land of Wheat Kings
    Posts
    754

    Aging Dad

    I think I'll try the wait and see approach for now, as I would like to talk to my Mum about it first. We're just not big communicators.

    Sorry to sound so desperate or hysterical. However, thanks very much for your advice and concern, it is appreciated.

  10. #10

    Aging Dad

    Not at all, Mary, and please don't think I'm being critical: I understand the reason for worry and I also fully understand the reasons for hesitation and caution. I don't think it's a cop-out... I think it's just reality.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Bookmarks

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •