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  1. #11
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    Quote Originally Posted by jollygreenjellybean View Post
    That seems a bit ridiculous that you have to accept that part right away and that it seems to be a condition that he continues your therapy..
    That's not what I'm saying at all. He's not forcing me to accept anything as a condition to continue therapy. That's just how I feel. I'm going there for help, I've been diagnosed, so I need to decide for myself whether I accept it and receive help, or If I refuse it and stop going. I personally don't see the point in continuing if I can't accept what he says.

    He's not 'pushing' DID, he's just telling me that's why I experience the things I do, such as time loss, saying/doing things I don't remember, or don't intend on saying/doing. Not remembering sessions. Getting injured and not feeling the pain for hours, sometimes days, etc.

    I could get a second opinion, but I really don't want to go see someone else.

  2. #12
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    Hi lost,

    My therapist has also wondered that about me. And I say wondered because it was more of a question than anything else. Like you, I don't think so. I've asked friends about it, if they've noticed something. My friends have told me they can tell when I'm dissociating but, I personally don't think that this means that I have DID. And nor does my therapist. I also suffer from severe dissociation. So sometimes, I can feel my personally being sucked in deep into myself - if that makes sense. There's a physical part of it too: a tingling as I start to disappear a little. I the back of my head starts to tingle and I can feel myself sucking into my stomach if you know what I mean? When things are bad, I've joked that there's this button on the back of my head...I push it and *poof* I'm gone inside myself. Completely disappear. But I'm still aware of stuff going on most of the time. On good days, I will ground myself so that I don't disappear all the way but everything has this kind of dreamlike nature to it and now, it's uncomfortable (before, although I only recognize it now, I liked that feeling). On bad days I lose time too. I can do a half day and not remember exactly what I was doing...but there are external signs that remind me of some of it. All of it can be distressful sometimes.

    But again, and like you, I don't think that it's necessarily DID. Just really strong dissociation. I'm not saying that you do or do not have DID. But like you, I just didn't believe that I had DID because...well, I think I would know. There's one personality in there. She just wants to disappear sometimes.

    So, and again I know that this is personal - I've just accepted that this is what I do for the time being. I keep doing the grounding techniques etc....and I do all the things that I have to do so that I don't need to dissociate.

    If you don't want a second opinion - don't. I completely agree. I like my therapist and I wouldn't want to start over again. If I had to start over again, I just wouldn't. If you do choose later on to get a second opinion that's your decision and I'll support you in that decision too.

    I think sometimes therapists speak out loud. It's a sounding board for us. And for me, it's been helpful for me to really pinpoint those times where I know I go away. For me personally, I've just chosen it as a means to figuring out (through that sounding board) what it is that I do and how to maybe change things up a little so that I have more awareness of what I do.

  3. #13
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    That's the real issue -- what is the treatment plan? The concern is that a treatment plan for DID, at least traditionally, would create more problems as a way to justify the diagnosis, e.g. "unearthing" more and more alternative identities.

  4. #14
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    I think I understand what you're saying Daniel. Over the past few years, I've relaxed about having "the diagnosis". I just want to know what I do, why I do it and the tools to feel better. The actual label, for me personally, doesn't mean diddly squat. But I understand other people's need to have it. I used to feel the same way about it.

  5. #15
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    Quote Originally Posted by Lost_In_Thought View Post
    That's not what I'm saying at all. He's not forcing me to accept anything as a condition to continue therapy. That's just how I feel. I'm going there for help, I've been diagnosed, so I need to decide for myself whether I accept it and receive help, or If I refuse it and stop going. I personally don't see the point in continuing if I can't accept what he says.

    He's not 'pushing' DID, he's just telling me that's why I experience the things I do, such as time loss, saying/doing things I don't remember, or don't intend on saying/doing. Not remembering sessions. Getting injured and not feeling the pain for hours, sometimes days, etc.

    I could get a second opinion, but I really don't want to go see someone else.
    There is a big difference between dissociative episodes and Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). I understood the questioned diagnosis to be DID, which as I said above is quite specific, rather rare, and in my opinion overdiagnosed.

    Is this not the case? If what he is saying is that you have dissociative episodes, that may well be consistent to what you have described. If he is saying specifically that the diagnosis is DID, that may be more open to question.

  6. #16
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    Sorry. Maybe I'm the one that confused the issue. I thought that it was still a "possible diagnosis" rather than an affirmative one. Which is why I wrote what I wrote. sorry for any confusion I may have cause.

  7. #17
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    I talked to him about it during my last session. He said it's a spectrum disorder, and all a matter of degree. Evidently, I'm on the 'mild' end of DID.

    He's still saying it's definitely DID, not just dissociative episodes.

    Not sure whether I'm going to go back again.

  8. #18
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    DDNOS would be more accurate, I think. Probably not really much different though.

  9. #19
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    What does DDNOS mean exactly

  10. #20
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    Re: Don't Know How To Accept This

    It's a catch-all category for dissociative disorders where the symptoms don't fir the criteria for the specific diagnoses. It stands for "Dissociative Disorder Not Otherwise Specified".

    The NOS designation is available for other diagnoses as well, e.g., EDNOS for Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified.

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