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  1. #1
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    Happens more than once

    You'd think if you have been through it once that you would know what to look out for so that it didn't happen again!! You would protect yourself? You would avoid certain situations? You wouldn't leave yourself vulnerable to it happening again? Once is devastating, twice is absolutely stupid, don't you think? You should learn from the first, so if it happens again, is it your fault? What did you do? Or not do? Is it that maybe that is why you are on the planet in the first place? To be abused?? Stripped of any self worth, identity and security? How do you forgive yourself, let alone the ones that do it?? Especially if it happens to you more than once? How do you ever trust anyone ever again? I don't think you can!!
    In 3 words I can sum up everything I have learned about life....it goes on!!

  2. #2
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    Re: happens more than once!!

    Even with our best effort we can not always protect ourselves from harm. That is when we need to get out of the situation, away from the person(s) who might cause harm, and ask for some outside help. It is definitely not your fault if someone has hurt you. I have never been very good at setting boundaries but I am slowly learning and very slowly learning to have trust. It would be nice if it was easier but good things can happen.

  3. #3
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    Re: happens more than once!!

    Hi Lonewolf Im sorry for the hurt you are going through..... I agree with mari.... it is not your fault that someone hurt you... even those who feel like they deserve it... it is not their fault. There are always people out there with the wrong intentions and there are also very good people. Intuition can be a very strong indicator.... hopefully your intuition will help you. My wife told me once " if you live life assuming everyone will be out to abuse you then that is what you will attract" I replied that I had to protect myself and she agreed. She recommended that I live life assuming that everyone is super kind and loving........ and then to proceed with caution. This thinking helped me a lot. We are all energy and we usually attract what we believe therefore I changed my beliefs and since then have met 3 great friends. I am not saying that you believe you deserve this, but is it possible that your thoughts are centered around the fact that the people you meet might have the wrong intentions\?

    I also am learning to bolt when my intuition gives me the least bit of a hint that someone has the wrong intention. We have gone through too much and the tolerance level for evil people is -1000. Trust first with caution. It is not your fault... you are a good person that deserves to be loved and respected and never compromise that fact

  4. #4
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    Re: happens more than once!!

    !!!!!!!!!!???????

  5. #5
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    Re: happens more than once!!

    I had left a comment yesterday, but it seems to have disappeared! So, even though it is very painful, I will do my best to go through it a little bit now!!

    I have never been comfortable being female to be honest, especially after the abuse that happened and the consequences I suffered because I told someone about it!! I don't think I will ever get over it completely! And now, after this, it is petrifying to tell anybody anything!! Lots of memories have been stirred!
    I wish it didn't pain me so much to trust anyone!! I feel trapped!! I love my home, it's the only one I have ever felt safe and settled in!! Now, im confused because I don't feel safe!! But its not my home, it's me, my mind, my memories of all of this follows me where ever I am!! I know that!!
    He invaded my home, my space, me!! He hurt me! He hurt this body and my mind!! He took the little confidence i had of being able to be a female! I feel digusting now! I understand i can't change sex, but I feel so vulnerable as a female, now more than ever!! I do get mistaken as a male and when that happens, it makes me more secure somehow!! If I could whip my spirit out of this prison body into something I felt content in, maybe a man or a vicious animal! I would be a little more secure in existing!!
    For now, I can't bring myself to even say the 'R' word, but thats what it was! He forced himself on me and I can still feel that when I'm trying to sleep and sometimes when I'm awake!! It haunts me everytime I go out and when im at home! There's no escaping it!! I wish I could sleep without fear!
    I don't know if I'll ever feel ok in this body, but more than anything in the world, I need a hug from a friend to let me know im safe, I don't think I can let anyone get that close to me ever again!! I'm so confused about all these feelings and thoughts!! I don't know what im going to do from now on??
    In 3 words I can sum up everything I have learned about life....it goes on!!

  6. #6
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    Re: happens more than once!!

    I had left a comment yesterday, but it seems to have disappeared!
    I don't see any post of yours that was moved or altered. I suspect you did not hit the "post" button, and moved your browser window to another page. Have done that myself, inadvertently.

    If you notice it right away, you can restore lost content by returning to the edit window, as the Forum software saves your entry as you type.

  7. #7
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    Re: happens more than once!!

    It's ok, thanks lol!! It is in a different thread I started somewhere else on the forum!!! Thanks again!!
    In 3 words I can sum up everything I have learned about life....it goes on!!

  8. #8
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    Re: happens more than once!!

    Hugs to you!

  9. #9
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    Re: happens more than once!!

    Spent the whole day sobbing my little heart out, squeezing my teddy with all my strength! I wish It would all just stop!! I met a new worker yesterday and I couldn't talk to her, I just clammed up!! I spent the whole time in silence, I managed to apologise for wasting her time and that was that!!
    I guess i don't want to be alone, but i just don't have any words either!! That's pretty stupid on a talk forum, isn't it? Really sorry for wasting more time you guys need for others that want to talk!!
    In 3 words I can sum up everything I have learned about life....it goes on!!

  10. #10
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    Re: happens more than once!!

    Sometimes the words just don't come or it's too difficult. It doesn't mean you don't stop trying or that you're wasting people's time.

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