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Thread: Is it s/h?

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    Is it s/h?

    I hurt myself today and I took myself up to A+E to get it sorted out!! It required stitches!! They insisted on giving me an injection to numb it first, but I totally refused it! They did sew it up in the end! I couldn't believe how much I enjoyed the intense pain from it!! I now am having a guilt trip because I feel as if I involved another person in my S/H! Did I? Can anyone help? I seem to be having stronger urges to s/h and when I get the pain from it, I feel as if I need more of it to satisfy my needs!! (even if the initial pain is accidental!) I don't completely understand why this is happening? Does anyone understand?? Advice please?
    In 3 words I can sum up everything I have learned about life....it goes on!!

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    Re: is it s/h?

    Sorry you hurt yourself hon I don't know, I guess people have all different reasons for s/h, but do you think it's possible it's become an addiction in the sense that you need increased levels of it to get the same effect? It's kind of scary because it sounds dangerous. Sorry I don't mean to scare you, I'm just concerned for you. I know you're not getting help and probably feel the need for desperate measures to cope. I don't know what to say - I hope someone else can give you more practical advice on how to get through this.Look after yourself ok?! Thinking of you xx

    ---------- Post Merged at 10:30 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 10:27 PM ----------

    P.S. If you feel like chatting I can stay around, if it would help, no pressure though.

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    Re: is it s/h?

    Thanks!! It is kinda like an addiction, I suppose! Unfortunately there's no 'rehab' for it!! I appreciate your honesty, I wish I could feel the fear that you have expressed, I just don't!! I would be so upset if someone I knew was doing what I am doing, but it's not someone else, it is only me!!

    ---------- Post Merged at 04:48 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 04:37 PM ----------

    I would appreciate it!! only if you are up to it lol?
    In 3 words I can sum up everything I have learned about life....it goes on!!

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    Re: is it s/h?

    I know, I do understand, genuinely. I would be a hypocrite to just tell you to stop endangering yourself (although I really would like to tell you to stop endangering yourself!!!) I do understand the thoughts that make it seem ok to do it. I just wish it was possible for you to step outside and see the lovely precious lonewolf who deserves to be cared for and cherished!!! (and it's not a criticism if you can't see it, I think we all have trouble seeing ourselves like that if we've had a lot of training not to!) I know you can't get help right now but that's because of a flawed, overburdened system, it's not because you don't deserve help. You are absolutely deserving of proper help.

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    Re: is it s/h?

    I know this is going to sound like real stupid self-pity, but I think I've carried on increasingly hurting myself where others have reduced what they inflict upon me!! I guess it is as you say-a habit!!
    In 3 words I can sum up everything I have learned about life....it goes on!!

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    Re: is it s/h?

    It doesn't sound like stupid self-pity, I think I understand, is it a way to express anger and pain because you don't have another way?...because your experiences have been denied/invalidated? please tell me if I'm getting it wrong x

    ---------- Post Merged at 11:16 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 11:08 PM ----------

    (Or that that is a part of it, not necessarily the whole story..?)

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    Re: is it s/h?

    Yeah! it is a bit like that, it is also because I know that if I put my anger onto the people it actually belongs with, I will in no doubt get into serious trouble, but if I take it out on myself there isn't any real repercussions from it!! This has always been one reason I s/h! I inflict the pain I feel like they deserve, on myself!! it doesn't matter then! I am sorry, that's a bit brutal!!
    In 3 words I can sum up everything I have learned about life....it goes on!!

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    Re: is it s/h?

    It's ok, I do understand, I have been there (I hope I won't go back there but I don't really know!) ...now I see it from the outside, happening to someone else, i see that it's a shame that you are suffering further pain because of somebody else's actions, I'm sorry hon - it sucks.

    ---------- Post Merged at 11:37 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 11:31 PM ----------

    Hi Lonewolf,
    Think I have to go to sleep, sorry, hope you don't feel like I'm abandoning you. Hope you can stay safe and feel safe tonight. Have a good sleep x

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    Re: is it s/h?

    Yeah, I know lol, it sucks!! I'm sorry that you've been here too!! I really am!!
    thanks for talking to me!! hope you have a good sleep!! catch up soon! sending you a big cyber hug!! x
    In 3 words I can sum up everything I have learned about life....it goes on!!

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    Re: is it s/h?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lonewolf View Post
    if I take it out on myself there isn't any real repercussions from it!!
    Hi Lonewolf, you know that this is not true, right? You know you had to be taken to the Emeregency, because your self-harm was dangerous. You also know that hurting yourself will have no impact on the people you are angry with and it will not provide a realistic solution to any of your problems. You know you are stronger than this. Nothing can cause you more harm than the things you are doing to yourself. I think this is irrational behaviour.
    I am trying to be helpful, but you have to understand, there is only one way to describe what you are doing - it is destructive and irrational.
    You need help from a psychiatrist immediately. Go to therapy, take medications, do what you have to do. You can not let this happen again!
    Good luck. As i said, you are stronger than your actions!

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