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  1. #121
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    Re: Coping Tip of the Day

    “Most people overestimate others' talents and underestimate their own.”

    ~ Orrin Woodward

  2. #122
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    Re: Coping Tip of the Day

    When you don’t know what to do, make tea

    The idea that something might be missing from my life first struck me while reading Conversations with Friends, by the Irish writer Sally Rooney. In Rooney’s novels, people prepare tea when they are sick, when they are nervous, and when they are bored. They brew pots before watching Netflix, in the midst of writing flirtatious emails, and while pondering illicit affairs. Eventually the reader must conclude in the Rooney universe, all characters are in the midst of either making or drinking tea at all times, unless otherwise specified...

    Social worker Melody Wilding has written that whenever we're feeling overwhelmed or frustrated, we should always stop to ask ourselves if we're hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. Any of those feelings are likely to fuel poor judgment, which means that it's time to stop what we're doing, take a break, and either eat a sandwich or do some journaling or call a friend or take a nap.

    These are all excellent ideas. Based on my experience in England, I would add that whenever we're feeling anything at all, we should probably make some tea and offer it to whoever is in the vicinity. A good cup, as George Orwell suggests, can make you feel wiser, braver, and more optimistic. And at the very least, if making tea is your default thing, then whatever is happening, no matter how scary, you will always, like the characters in Rooney's novels, have something to do.

  3. #123
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    Re: Coping Tip of the Day

    “Suppose you’re called on to navigate some particularly difficult life dilemma, your own, or that of a close confidant. You yearn to talk matters over with your mentor, spouse, or best friend. Yet, for whatever reason, you can’t get a hold of these valued others—perhaps they’re traveling, busy, or even deceased. Research shows that simply imagining having a conversation with them is as good as actually talking with them. So consult them in your mind. Ask them what advice they’d offer. In this way, a cherished parent or mentor, even if deceased, leaves you with an inner voice that guides you through challenging times. Your past moments of love and connection make you lastingly wiser.”

    ― Barbara L. Fredrickson, Love 2.0: How Our Supreme Emotion Affects Everything We Feel, Think, Do, and Become

  4. #124
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  5. #125
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  6. #126
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  7. #127
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    Re: Coping Tip of the Day

    What Works for Me May Not Work for You

    When it comes to fitness goals, if you find a type of movement that feels both good and right to you, it's much more likely to become a habit.

  8. #128
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    Re: Coping Tip of the Day

    How Emotional Problems Arise: 7 Maladaptive Coping Behaviors

    Rumination tries to prepare you for every bad thing that might happen. In the form of good-bad evaluations, it tries to perfect a flawed self and a flawed world. But these efforts never work. Ultimately, rumination keeps you focused on what's bothering you, so its net effect is that you feel more anxious, more angry, or a greater sense of loss and disappointment.

  9. #129
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    Re: Coping Tip of the Day

    Living with Difficult Feelings | NewHarbinger.com
    By Robert Leahy, PhD

    Srategies for coping with the complexities of real life--not an ideal life:

    • Emotional Realism: Life will entail a full range of emotions--painful and pleasurable. It comes with the territory.

    • Inevitable Disappointments: You will be disappointed and disappoint others. Friends and partners don't always live up to our expectations, but we can still connect and grow together.

    • Constructive Discomfort: Making progress will involve doing things that are uncomfortable. If you think you should not be uncomfortable, then you won't make progress. Discomfort is temporary and helps build resilience.

    • Do What You Don't Want to Do: We can only make progress if we build self-control and self-discipline. This means doing what you do not want to do to get what you really want to get. Doing the hard things makes life easier in the long run.

    • Successful Imperfection: You will make progress--not perfection--if you continue to move in the right direction, imperfectly. Embracing imperfection as a means to an end will help you achieve your goals.

    • Flexible Satisfaction: Our expectations get in the way of living in the real world. Adjusting our expectations so that we can find satisfaction and contentment is a better strategy than protesting or giving in to despair.


    ---

    from Don't Believe Everything You Feel:

    Screenshot_2020-07-23 Don't Believe Everything You Feel.png
    Last edited by Daniel; July 23rd, 2020 at 07:56 PM.

  10. #130
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    Re: Coping Tip of the Day

    Time management

    Write down two or three encouraging statements. What are you working on? Why are you working on it? What will you gain if you can improve on this skill? Answer those questions and refer to the answers daily.

    Source:
    The Smart but Scattered Guide to Success (2016)
    Last edited by Daniel; July 28th, 2020 at 05:49 PM.

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