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  1. #11
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    Re: When Stigma Prevented Me from Getting Help

    I am glad your son has you and his father to help him. One thing that help my daughter was to have her tagged with an older student who would be there for her if her anxiety got to high or if she just needed to talk to someone or get help with her assignments. Medication changes different input from different doctors have all helped. With compassion that is the most important part of it all compassion i hope your son sees there is a way out there is a way to move forward. He is so lucky to have you and caring people in his life.
    Words always stay inside ones soul

  2. #12
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    Re: When Stigma Prevented Me from Getting Help

    Thank-you FMN for your kind words. Yet, I am quite concerned because I believe my son is not only masking his depression, but also using marijuana in our home to lessen his emotion. Our son is very bright and lives with ADHD.

    As he was growing up, I filled up his emotional tank with all love that I did not receive from my mother. Both my husband and I grew up in single parent homes. My parents divorced. My husband's parents never married. I feel like my son is vegetating. I have talked, listened, tried tough love to no avail. This is a young adult who is afraid to ride a bike, swim, or learn to drive a car. His bedroom is worse than a pig sty. He can carry on a conversation on various questions. Yet, if you ask him how he's feeling or what he's feeling, he shuts down. He is most loving with our 2 cats and dog. He is affectionate with me and tolerant of his Dad. He is respectful for the most part. He is not allowed to smoke in the house.

    In addition to keeping myself together, I worry. If I had one wish, it would be to watch my son move into manhood, find something he enjoys, and commit himself to it while he explores other options.
    Jesse

  3. #13
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    Re: When Stigma Prevented Me from Getting Help

    From personal experience I think it has to come from him. But thatís the tricky part; how to get him to find something that inspires him or captivates and stimulates his high I.Q. without interfering or at a minimum not appearing to be intiicing. The mind of someone with ADHD that also has a high I.Q. is easily bored if not stimulated properly. When it is, and challenged, amazing things are possible.

    Just had an idea... A shot in the dark... You could always try something that might or might not work and talk to him about the forum. Let him know he is not the only one in his situation. And you could always let him know that if he wants to discuss things with someone that can understand what heís going through without mom knowing thereís always private messaging as an option.

    I donít know if things wouldíve been different for me at his age if I had someone to communicate with that was not family or a menta Health worker. (Didnít trust anyone) But life as an adult took hold and well did the best I could balancing a talented mind with the limitations of my ďalphabet soupĒ itís only in the last 3 years that I opened up and started learning about my issues. Itís really hard when you have no one that even has a basic understanding around you of what itís like being as you are. Which applies to pretty much any mental health issue.

  4. #14
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    Re: When Stigma Prevented Me from Getting Help

    Gary: I never thought of this forum. I have been visiting here for years. I will give this some thought. Thank-you. And thanks FMN for allowing me to vent.
    Jesse

  5. #15
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    Re: When Stigma Prevented Me from Getting Help

    ADHD my daughter has that too mind all over the place but she is not able to stay still walks miles and miles got her a membership that involves all activities swimming skating yoga and so much more she is enjoying that and it helps to keep her off the streets really. I am sorry your son is finding it hard to be social i found with this membership my daughter now at least she is among people although she does not talk to anyone much she still keeps to herself.

    I always pray she meets someone a true friend but no that has not happened. I worry i really do what happens when were gone who do they reach out to then. Maybe Jessie if like said you can find what interest him what really interest him if it is animals maybe he would like to volunteer at a animal shelter or wildlife shelter something like that just to get him among other people just a thought I know you have tried.
    Words always stay inside ones soul

  6. #16
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    Re: When Stigma Prevented Me from Getting Help

    FMN, the extreme physical hyperactivity tends to mellow out sometimes considerably as you get older. So there is hope for her in that regards. Was great idea finding a way to channel and release all that built up energy in a positive healthy way for her

  7. #17
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    Re: When Stigma Prevented Me from Getting Help

    Just saying hi @Jesse910 just hoping all is well for you and your son hope it gets better.
    Words always stay inside ones soul

  8. #18
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    Re: When Stigma Prevented Me from Getting Help

    Hi FMN:

    And, I hope this Thanksgiving season will be peaceful for you. I am doing okay. I am somewhat cautious with new therapist, but forging onward. He understands and offers support. Yet, I am wary of trusting him. I need to protect myself and, I am okay with this.

    My husband and I have sat down with our son to figure out where he is in his thinking and to try to assess how we might motivate and help him to help himself. There is much that he needs to work through. And, it is readily apparent that while he is an adult, he is going to need assistance throughout.
    Jesse

  9. #19
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    Re: When Stigma Prevented Me from Getting Help

    (I need to protect myself and, I am okay with this.) I hear you i really do when you say this. I do understand also that although he is adult assistance will be needed throughout his life same with my girl. I am glad your husband is there to help you talk to your son and i wish the best for him. Protecting oneself i think also is a good thing for sure. I am glad you are taking care of you in that regard.
    Words always stay inside ones soul

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