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Thread: Troubling times

  1. #1

    Troubling times

    Hey

    I wasnt sure whether or not to post this, but then thought, it is the reason I came. For support. Also I dont know if its in the right section either. Was gonna post in the depression section, but there are other things too, and im a young adult (20) so I thought i'd just put it here.

    Anyways, whats up? your saying? I'll give you the main two.

    Depression: Ive been suffering from depression for about 2 or so years now. Possibly more. And it occationally gets so bad I have suicide thoughts. But there just thoughts, i would not do it, i dont think.

    Shyness/social anxiety: Ooh, this is quite bad for me, up to the point I almost hate going out and get quite anxious (cant spell that) some times. If I get into a situation I cant handle I have the redness which makes me more embaressed and self-concious. I dont really talk to many people outside my house, except for one freind. I must sound like a loner now. :blank:

    Another thing is I cant seem to find employment, my shyness makes me feel awful when im out, and feel I have to act and look a certain me. I cant remember a time ive relaxed when outside. Plus all the NO's dont help either.



    I think thats all Ill write for now. Any advice or help appriciated.

  2. #2

    Re: Troubling times

    Do you have a regular doctor that you could talk to? He or she could probably help you find a therapist. Plus, I think it's always a good idea to get a physical just to make sure there's nothing physical causing these issues. One of the times in my life I have been extremely suicidal I was suffering from hyperthyroidism which is treatable.

    Depression and anxiety can be treated with medication and therapy. I think it's especially important to get some help because of the suicidal thoughts even if you think you won't act on it, it is scary to have those thoughts.


    There's also lots of good information on the depression and anxiety boards here on this forum.

    I know I'm not much help, but hopefully someone else will come along with some better information.

  3. #3

    Re: Troubling times

    How old are you, Indifferent, and what general part of the world do you live in? Is seeing a counselor/therapist out of the question?

    Both of the issues you mention -- depression and shyness/social anxiety -- are very treatable, both with medications and with psychotherapy (especially Cognitive Behavior Therapy or CBT in both cases). There is no reason for you to have to continue to struggle with these on your own. See the resources on CBT and Distorted Thinking in the "Resources" section of this forum.

    In the arms of an angel.
    Fly away from here.
    -- In The Arms Of The Angel - Sarah McLachlan

    These wounds won't seem to heal
    This pain is just too real
    -- My Immortal - Evanescence
    These are two of my favorite artists

  4. #4

    Re: Troubling times

    Im 20, and from up north, uk (yorkshire).

    I dont really want to talk to a doctor about this. I'd feel to embarassed, Plus our doctor is far from helpful.
    Seems like the only ones that are intrested are the ones you pay, and I dont have money to ... well i dont have money lol

    Physical things are, I.b.s Back pain, astmah, possibly sinusitus, dont like sunlight very much, and just aches and pains.

    I'll say now, im a big procrastinater, i'll always put things off. I dont know if i'd even make it to the doctors.
    Is there another way? or is it really important? or should i know?

    I havnt been employed or studying for over a year, and I think that must have made me slide even further down.

    I like them two songs, i like the slower songs now.

    Thanks for the help.
    PS: Im going to be away for a while (afew days) but i should be back on wednesday. Ill reply then, if anyone does before me.

  5. Re: Troubling times

    Shyness/social anxiety: Ooh, this is quite bad for me, up to the point I almost hate going out and get quite anxious (cant spell that) some times. If I get into a situation I cant handle I have the redness which makes me more embaressed and self-concious. I dont really talk to many people outside my house, except for one freind. I must sound like a loner now. :blank:
    Hi indifferent,
    firstly, we don't really think in terms of labels here, With the amount of insecurities and fears that are posted here, I don't think that 'loner' was the first thing that anybody thought. I personally thought... 'hmm, sounds familier'.

    The depression you mentioned, I used to feel the same, that they are only thoughts, and not to much to worry about because they wouldn't amount to anything. Just be aware, that if you continue to have these thoughts, it seems that the usual progression is for them to get worse, (do to a desenstising of the thoughts, i assume), and could progress to something else. Don't feel like its not worth thinking about because they are just thoughts, thats what I'm trying to get accross, lol. Don't give yourself a chance to get used to them.

    Now, about the crouds. here i really understand you. I used to get panic attacks when i was in a room with to many people. I had a very low self esteem regarding how I act/look, so much so that I would just mumble when trying to speak!!! My words would just trip over each other, and if anyone paid me attention, i'd blush like crazy and then feel like a complete idiot that i just couldn't relax around people.

    I don't really know why its different now, I think I began seeing (or thinking i could see ) everybodies way of showing their insecurities, and began to feel a little more relaxed. I started reading passages written by the current Dali Lama, perhaps these types of texts may help you with the way you are thinking at the moment?

    Anyway, let us know..


  6. #6

    Re: Troubling times

    Quote Originally Posted by ^^Phoenix^^
    Shyness/social anxiety: Ooh, this is quite bad for me, up to the point I almost hate going out and get quite anxious (cant spell that) some times. If I get into a situation I cant handle I have the redness which makes me more embaressed and self-concious. I dont really talk to many people outside my house, except for one freind. I must sound like a loner now. :blank:
    Hi indifferent,
    firstly, we don't really think in terms of labels here, With the amount of insecurities and fears that are posted here, I don't think that 'loner' was the first thing that anybody thought. I personally thought... 'hmm, sounds familier'.

    The depression you mentioned, I used to feel the same, that they are only thoughts, and not to much to worry about because they wouldn't amount to anything. Just be aware, that if you continue to have these thoughts, it seems that the usual progression is for them to get worse, (do to a desenstising of the thoughts, i assume), and could progress to something else. Don't feel like its not worth thinking about because they are just thoughts, thats what I'm trying to get accross, lol. Don't give yourself a chance to get used to them.

    Now, about the crouds. here i really understand you. I used to get panic attacks when i was in a room with to many people. I had a very low self esteem regarding how I act/look, so much so that I would just mumble when trying to speak!!! My words would just trip over each other, and if anyone paid me attention, i'd blush like crazy and then feel like a complete idiot that i just couldn't relax around people.

    I don't really know why its different now, I think I began seeing (or thinking i could see ) everybodies way of showing their insecurities, and began to feel a little more relaxed. I started reading passages written by the current Dali Lama, perhaps these types of texts may help you with the way you are thinking at the moment?

    Anyway, let us know..
    Im checking out dali lama on google right now I've read alittle and it seems to be good.
    Ive spent along with another family member over a thousand pounds on books to help.
    Ive still got some that are to be delivered, but I dont think ill be getting any more for a while now. I cannot afford it. I was like --> ... when I calculated it afew days ago.

    Thats along with all the articles/help online. Had information overload ( ) afew months ago that I stopped.

    I see that too, now I notice other people have problems that they are working through. Most proberbly wont even notice you they are that focused on themselfs. Like me!

    I think ive already gotton comfortable and its hard to break this, I mean its been going on for as long as I remember.
    Ive just lost motivation to do anything, everyone thinks im lazy, maybe I am, but i just dont know what to do anymore.

    Anything else you think I should try.

  7. Re: Troubling times

    Sure, you can get books that focus on his main teachings, its usually best if they are lessons that he has given himself,
    as far as people thinking you are lazy, i guess, why do they think that? and in the end... does it matter how they see you? Your goal is to sort your self out, (emotions, life rituals, etc) to how YOU see fit. Not anybody else.
    If YOU think your lazy, and don't want to be (I've been there too, belieeve me) then start by just breaking that ritual. encorperate one thing at a time, or write a schedual that you know you'll keep. go for a walk. I know it sounds dull, but its often silly little things like this that help you break cycles.

  8. #8

    Re: Troubling times

    I actually do belive i have gotton lazy, but there is a reason, I have lost all motivation as I said, and I feel usless now.
    I know you said to do the "little" things, but i think thats a good idea for me, im gonna try it out again (did it before) think I need to go smaller perhaps.
    Thanks alot for all your help.

    If you want to (or anyone else) add anything you think of, please do.


  9. #9

    Re: Troubling times

    I always found that when I started feeling like I was running in circles and getting nowhere, setting realistic goals helped me stop the rat race. I'd start with something small...like, say, getting the closet cleaned out, or getting the bathroom spiffy, or finishing a project I'd started and left to moulder. Once that was done, I got a feeling of accomplishment and could set a new, short-term goal.

    Just be sure not to set your goals too high. When you feel like you've lost motivation, it's not a good idea to set a goal like: "I'll become a quantum physicist by August of next year!" Lots better to just do little things that you know you CAN do. The greater goals will come later.

  10. #10

    Re: Troubling times

    indifferent. one of the best pieces of advise i received from a professor was to find a support structure. it seems so simple, but these words have been echoing in my mind ever since. and i feel so stupid now for having waited so long. i haven't even found a psycologist yet, ha, but i'm going to. i've already called and waiting to receive an appointment.

    looking forward to progress. i'm so tired of sometimes, i can hardly even type any more.

    wish you the best of luck.
    g-scared

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