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  1. #1

    I just dont know what to do

    yesterday my girlfriend turns around and says to me that she really used to be "in" love with me but just lately she does feel that she is, but she wants to stay together becuase she says she loves me and could possibley fall "in" love with me again. i asked her what it was that made her fall out of love with me and she said that she wishes she knew then she could fix it.
    when i said to her if your just gona continue this relationship becuase you dont wanna hert me than maybe it would be better to end it. to wich she said something along the lines of your not even fighting for me.
    so i explained to her how much i love her how head over heals iam and how i thought she still felt the same, and that i really didnt want to let her go but all the fighting in the world wont do anything if she does want it to. so she said that she does wanna give it a go.
    i couldnt saty over after that so we spent a few more hours together after that then i went home.

    so i text her this after noon basically saying how much this herts and id do anything to get back to how we were. to wich she text back i know but i need to give her space and stop going on about things.
    so i text her back is there any chance she could fall back "in" love weith me again, and she said i dont want to get your hopes up.
    so i saidso iam not tgetting my hopes up iam just trying to understand where we stand, you know can we still see each other as boyfriend and girlfriend.
    she replied i want to but i dont know what i want at the mo, you just have to stop asking me its doing my head in, i know you want know whats going on but i need to think yourr not helping your just making it worse by going on about it.

    so what on earth do i do? how do i win her back?

  2. #2

    Re: I just dont know what to do

    I don't think you can "win her back" unless she wants to be "won". In fact, those really aren't words that apply to a relationship at all, in my opinion - either she wants to be with you or she doesn't - a partner is not a trophy that one wins or loses.

    People do go through ups and downs in any relationships. Sometimes that reflects things happening in the relationship. Sometimes that reflects things going on within one of the individuals. It's neither unusual nor unhealthy to reevaluate where you are and where you're heading at various points in your life.

    It sounds as though your girlfriend is uncertain about how or what she feels right now. All you can do is give her the time and space she is requesting to figure it out.

  3. #3

    Re: I just dont know what to do

    Ive asked her if she just wants to go for a casual drink tomorow afternoon, and maybe go to the cinema after no pressure just to see each other. she said yes so iam gonna make sure i do nothing but treat it like a normal date no winning or whatever from me lol

  4. #4

    Re: I just dont know what to do

    Good!

  5. #5

    Re: I just dont know what to do

    just wish i knew what happened or what ive done to make her fall out of love with me

  6. #6

    Re: I just dont know what to do

    That was part of what I was trying to say, Steven. It may have absolutely nothing to do with you. It may be entirely something she's going through herself.

  7. #7

    Re: I just dont know what to do

    so just give her time basically, and dont push her into answering anything and dont give up untill she says theres absolutly no point trying

  8. #8

    Re: I just dont know what to do

    That would be my advice.

  9. #9

    Re: I just dont know what to do

    I agree totally with David. Sounds like the best thing to do is just lay back and enjoy her company when you're together. Don't push for committment, or answers, or reasons. Just have fun together and let things develop as they develop. If it's meant to be and you don't try to rush it, it will happen, hon.

  10. #10

    Re: I just dont know what to do

    its just hard iam still in love with her and thought she felt the same i didnt know there was anything wrong. just wish i knew what was wrong

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