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Thread: Trying to deal

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    Trying to deal

    I went to my doctors yesterday and today. My psychiatrist changed my meds. I am trying hard to work, to move to both a new job and a new house, and to pull out of psychosis. I had a very hard time telling my psychiatrist yesterday that I am somewhat better but still have voices calling me. It is a monumental struggle to read. I have 70 people reporting to me and I can only think of one thing and that is how to get out. I have to travel all next week and I am worried about it. When I come home I just feel safe in my office - nowhere else in my house because the rooms are too big. TV is excrutiating. I love my husband dearly but I can't carry on a conversation. I just want out. This is too hard.

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    Re: Trying to deal

    Oh, I am so sorry you're having such a hard time. That's a lot of stress to be dealing with.

    If spending time in your office makes you feel safe then that's what I would do. I sometimes wrap up in a blanket and sit in the corner of the dining room in the dark of the night because I feel safe doing that.

    Lots of hugs.

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    Re: Trying to deal

    thank you Janet - I know you are having it very rough too. I am just tired right now. I am taking tomorrow off. I think that the medicines have to get straight for me to get better. It's just too hard to do everything as though nothing is happening to me. I don't know what to do.

    TG

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    Re: Trying to deal

    TG...I'm sorry your struggling...You've had alot on your plate and you deserve to be gentle with yourself....RIMH

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    Re: Trying to deal

    Thanks RIMH - you too.

    I also am very worried about my husband who is recovering from cancer. He had surgery and I think about losing him and how I would ever be able to stand it. And my current condition's effect on him. I wish I could wish this away....

    TG

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    Re: Trying to deal

    I wish I could wish it away too. I wish the best for you and your husband. That must be even more stress.

    I think you're amazingly strong even though you don't feel like it. And brave and so compassionate.

    Hold on to hope.

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    Re: Trying to deal

    Thank you Janet. And it helps to know that I am not alone. I count on all of you too for your wisdom and compassion. In your other post you mention being a patient instead of a helper. I like to think of you as a patient helper (has multiple meanings, huh?)

    Hang in there yourself

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    Re: Trying to deal

    Thank you.

    It's hard and wonderful and amazing how we need each other and how we can help each other so much here on this forum. I am so thankful for it.

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    Re: Trying to deal

    Quote Originally Posted by texasgirl View Post
    It's just too hard to do everything as though nothing is happening to me.
    I can relate to this as I go through most of my days pretending that everything is "okay" on the outside when inside I am crumbling. Sort of like my avatar of the masks. It is hard and very tiring at the same time.

    I am glad to hear that you are taking tomorrow off from work and hope that you use the time to take care of you, however that may be.

    Take care and my thoughts are with you

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    Re: Trying to deal

    Thank you Halo. I plan to do nothing tomorrow - hopefully sleep.

    Take care,

    TG
    Last edited by Halo; March 4th, 2008 at 02:58 PM.

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