What should I do?
I am 35 yo male who is normally (well used to be) outgoing happy and generally patient and caring..
I have all my life suffered bouts of depression that always went away in a few day's, I dealt with it.
Lately, the past couple of months that is, i have been increasingly irritable, I hardly sleep, and when I do it isn't very restful.. my patience with my children (not always high anyhow) has gone to near nil, and I cant even enjoy the hobbies I used to love..
I have in addition begun to be prone to violent outbursts, and while I have only displayed this twice in front of my children, and I have never hurt anyone, I am sincerely scared for my well being and the safety of my family.
I do not understand what is happening to me.. I am severely underemployed, working only 2 days a week, and my oldest child is emotionally challenged. Theres a lot of other stressors involved, so I know I am probably suffering a severe case of stress mismanagement, however I feel i have come to an empass and must seek out some solution to this before i become a real threat to my family.. In the past, my bouts of more severe depression were before I had a wife and kids, so i just rode it out. Now I am beggining to see I may not have that option.
I could ramble on for a long time, but I think you get the point.. My plan is to call the help-lines in the next day or so, but I thought I would post here first.. just to see if there are still some tools available to me that might help without having to go to a DR or counselor..
I am prepared to do that, so tell me like it is..
a scared, but loving Father
If you never give up you will never lose the battle!!