Do therapists talk anymore?

[Banned]

Lately I have been wondering about all these new, fancy "therapies" that are emerging, and I'm wondering whatever happened to good old "talk therapy". In my ongoing quest to find a good, qualified therapist, I have come across therapists that are into all these weird, new age things that I'm not really comfortable with. EFT, NLP, EMDR...it's like alphabet soup. Then there's "body work", "Hakomi", "mindfullness"... Whatever happened to just sitting down and talking? It doesn't seem to exist, that I can find, and that's all I really want. I don't want or need any of this other stuff.

So - does talk therapy still exist, or is it a thing of the past?

 

[Daniel E.]

I would think the people who do body work, etc. complain that talk therapies like CBT get almost all of the attention and the bulk of the clients.

---------- Post added at 11:02 PM ---------- Previous post was at 10:32 PM ----------

But many of these providers are in different worlds, eg some body work people are massage therapists with a certification that allows them to seem qualified to treat trauma patients, etc.

 

[Banned]

I'm wondering if it's a geographical thing, or the "latest and greatest".

I am just really struggling with finding someone, and most of the ones I've contacted preferred these new methods and debunk things like CBT. I just wondered if things have changed that much in the last couple years. It just seems odd to me that I can't just sit down and talk. I have to "feel it in my body" and "imagine what my body would say to me if it could talk"...which just makes me roll my eyes and think "I'm paying how much for this?" No thanks...

---------- Post added at 09:23 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:13 PM ----------

Added thought:

I have been depression-free for about six months now (yay!!!) and am just trying to make sure I have the necessary "aids" in place to maintain it in the future. I think this is another reason why I'm not looking for anything deep or intense but rather something on a "maintenance" level, and many therapists seem less-than-enthusiastic about that kind of relationship. I just want to know that if I need to go somewhere and talk, or get a different perspective, I can do it safely, but the therapists I've contacted just don't want to offer that. Maybe I'm looking for the wrong thing in the wrong place.

 

[Daniel E.]

We have only like two (secular) therapists in my small town. Maybe three. All of them do CBT.

So since you live in the big city, I'm sure those CBT therapists are out there

 

[Yuray]

You've raised a good point Turtle.
Psychobabble - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
This link doesn't specifically address your concerns, but it may shed some light

 

[Banned]

You would be amazed at how little options there are in this great big city. And just hint at "borderline" and they all head for the hills. And I don't feel right withholding that information, even though I've been really stable for awhile now and am doing very well.

I think my next step is to look outside my city. I went back to my old job at the airline so "have plane, will travel". Being in this city (oil town, lots of money, etc), service providers can afford to be very picky about who they take as clients. Maybe a smaller town would actually yield much better results. I never thought of it that way til now.

 

[forgetmenot]

Hi Turtle nice to see you have been depression free for awhile that give us hope too As for talk therapy i am recieving that now with my therapist I don't think it is a thing of the past I do hope you find someone soon I like you also think talking does help so much more.

 

[Daniel E.]

You would be amazed at how little options there are in this great big city.

The therapists I am talking about are from a community clinic. So they have to work with pretty much everyone. I don't think they can easily turn people down because they are partially funded by the government to serve the community.

Maybe check with the department of mental health over there.

 

[Banned]

Thank Spirit it's good to see you too. Yes there's always hope - I never thought I'd be the one to say that but I found that staying on my medication actually does work (I haven't missed a dose in over six months and it makes a HUGE difference) and surrounding yourself with positive people who contribute to your health and recovery are key. Those were/are my strategies. I got rid of the negativity in my life and am actuallly really enjoying a life free of suicidal thoughts and depression. It's fantastic.

 

[Banned]

I think I might have found someone in San Francisco. His website piqued my interest many, many years ago and I just checked and it's still current. I think I will email him and see what he says about a commuting client. From what I can see on his website, it's pretty much along the lines of what I'm looking for.

I went to see my "old" (read: previous) therapist today and we're not going to meet for at least a month because there's nothing to meet about right now. She said I'm doing fantastic and have made huge strides since she saw me a year ago. So maybe it's not that I need therapy, but that I want therapy, but it's kind of hard to deliver something like this without some direction which I totally lack.

Hmmm..well, I'll email this guy in San Fran and see what he says.

 

[Ryan Howes]

Great question, Turtle. I think a bit of jargon (aka "psychobabble"!) you might find helpful are the terms "directive" vs. "non-directive" therapy. I think you're concerned that the therapists you're running into are too directive, that is, they hear your concerns and then snap into action, looking for an intervention or solution for the problem. You may be looking for a non-directive therapist, one who lets you control the topic and pace of the therapy, adding their reflections and observations occasionally but letting you decide what you want to do about it. Historically, psychodynamic therapy (Freud's stuff) and humanistic/client centered therapy (the work of Carl Rogers) was considered non-directive, but in recent years there has been a push toward directive, results-oriented therapy due to pressure from insurance companies and many clients who prefer this kind of work. Unfortunately, this has resulted in your dilemma, having a hard time finding someone to listen with care without the need to roll up their sleeves and produce measurable results. All this to say, when interviewing new therapists you might find it helpful to use terms (their jargon!) and let them know you're looking for non-directive, supportive, client-centered therapy. I think this signals the "talk therapy" you're looking for. In addition, some therapists will work over the phone if you can't find someone nearby and travel becomes a pain. Hope this helps!

 

[forgetmenot]

I hope this therapist is a good match for you Turtle let us know how it goes okay

 

[Banned]

Thanks Ryan. I've always preferred therapists who take the bull by the horns, so to speak, so more directive I guess, but more science-based. My typical line is "I know I have issues but I don't know what they are" - so, I want someone who's not afraid to jump in and ask the hard questions and help me figure them out. I'm not sure how effective all these funky new therapies are, quite frankly, and the ones I've tried have not felt comfortable or helpful. I've done some cbt which was helpful, and I've done some exploration of past issues and how they affect me now, but I don't really have a hankering to move my eyes back and forth and indicate things by tapping my fingers. I think I've identified, just now, what I'm looking for - something supported with empirical evidence that isn't too, well, weird. And it just seems like therapy, like everything else, has fads and phases, and these new things like EMDR are the latest and greatest and what most people that I've come into contact with are working with. I suppose the adage of working with what you know at the time applies to therapies - everybody has had their time and place...and right now it's alphabet soup's time and place.

 

[Banned]

I'm giggling to myself right now because I went back and re-read this other person's website. It's amazing how time and experience change one's perspective.

He's very, very Catholic, and very anti same-sex relationships, which won't work since I'm kind of seeing someone right now. He's also against eating meat because it's an "expensive luxury" and that money could be given to the poor, and he's against competition in all forms, including sports. Also against drinking anything but water and tattoos - he said if you have a tattoo you should cover it in shame for having defiled your body.

Um, no...I think I'll keep looking. I love my tattoos, I'm excited to be on the edge of a same-sex relationship, I love chicken breast, and I drink lattes like they're going out of style.

Back to square one. Oh well. Not for lack of trying.

 

[Jesse910]

Turtle, I'm impressed that you've been able to overcome your depression and are taking your meds on a regular basis. I still struggle with the meds issue at times. You sound as though you've reached a place in your life where you don't need counseling all the time per se, but rather want to have someone in place should the need arise. And, yes, while all of these new types of therapy are being utilized, nothing replaces talk therapy -- that one-on-one dialogue where you build a trusting relationship with someone who gets to know you and mirrors back your thoughts so that you can better understand.After my initial years of working with a psychiatrist, I decided that I needed to work someone who could provide me with more than a "med check." And, while some new facets of current therapies creep into my therapy, it is always with my consent. I never have to do anything that I'm not comfortable doing. Do be selective in who you choose. Your well being is important.

 

[Banned]

Thanks, Jesse.

I don't know if "overcome" is the right word for my depression. I believe it will always be sitting on my shoulder, ready to launch at me. But, I also believe that if I keep doing what I'm doing (meds, exercise, keeping my stress down, sleep), it will make it harder and harder for it to launch at me. I'm not delusional - I do know I will relapse at some point and that's what scares me. I had a therapist last year and it didn't work out for a bunch of reasons (mainly her cancelling every appointment) which was unfortunate. Then I tried going back to a previous one but after three appointments she said to go be free. My psychiatrist says I can fix myself by getting a good book and following it. So - my mission is two-fold, prevent relapse and address any additional areas of growth. I can't help it - I like to talk. Talk therapy is my gig.

I can relate to still struggling with meds. I struggled for about two years and constantly went off, then on, then off, then on, etc. I am huge into self-sabotaging and I used it as a form of manipulation and self-sabotage. I still struggle with the fight for health but I force myself to make the right decisions. I knew I had a breakthrough recently because although I'm doing really, really well, I couldn't imagine going off my meds. I really couldn't. This response is completely opposite of my previous attitude when the second I had a good day I stopped them, crashed really hard, and then had to start all over again. I don't want to go back there. I have a really good job I want to be able to enjoy and staying on my meds gives me the energy to do the other things I need to do to keep the demons at bay. They are all critical pieces of the puzzle/solution, and if one thing is missing everything else falls apart.