More threads by lucitania


I was diagnosed with schizophrenia 1 year ago, for complicated reasons I am unable to get those files transfered (ex-different continent.)

I've been seeing new psychs for about 3-4 months now. I told them I was diagnosed and they shake there head and say, 'No, I don't believe it.'
They say that by just TALKING to me, I do not have schizophrenia. They diagnosed me with borderline personality disorder and told my family I may be making up that I have schizophrenia for attention.
They gave me antipsychotics (which I od-ed on and I have none left.)
Why the f*ck would they give me antipsychotics if I only have borderline personality disorder?!?!

Here are some of the symptoms I've been having for over a year now, (ones that i can remember.):

-Hallucinations-scary violent, some are just plain weird-objects moving, looking at me etc-I get these daily or every second day.

-Memory loss-I can't remember things from last year, ex-I didn't know I went on vacation until I saw the pics last week and was shocked, it was completely erased from my mind.
Some times I find myself in a room two hours later and I have no idea what I am doing there. I forget my name, where I am etc.

-Hearing voices-I hear them very often, women children, men, only a handful can control me though, the rest are just annoying or scary.

-Really weird thoughts, like if i walk up the stairs at a certain time a plane is going to crash and kill lots of people, or by picking up a pen I am hurting it...People feed off my and take my memories/happiness away. I don't associate with people anymore, I haven't left the house in months except to go to the hospital.

-Cutting, head banging-I have found myself cutting up my arms and banging my head when I don't remember starting it or why I am doing it.

-suicide-Intentional-I have scary thoughts and have tried to kill myself many times.

-Eating disorder-I'm sometimes scared to eat food or drink water, then at other times binge eat nonstop until I cry in pain.

Bah..I know I've written too much now...If anyone is out there who reads this please give me your comments-
I feel like I am being tricked and lied to by the doctors...Please help.

Daniel E.
Sometimes, psychotic symptoms are secondary to a mood disorder like borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, or even depression.

There is a section about psychotic symptoms at Borderline Personality Today.
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