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    "There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered."
    Nelson Mandela, posted by Daniel

pocono

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Has anyone else had the experience of constantly fantasizing about their therapist? In my case these are not sexual fantasies. They typically involve detailed scenarios of me being hurt or vulnerable and needing/wanting to be rescued or comforted.

The need to construct these fantasies seems to come in waves. Sometimes it feels like for weeks at a time, during any free moment when my mind is not otherwise occupied, I can't help but work on a fantasy. That is what is happening to me now.

I find these fantasies disturbing, distracting, and sometimes scarry. I do discuss them with my therapist quite a bit (which can be very, very difficult for me), but that does not seem to make them go away.

I feel like I am, in some way, dependent not only on my therapist, but on my fantasies about him as well.
 

Halo

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Hi Pocono,

I can't say that I have had constant fantasies about my therapist but I have, while in a crisis or feeling very overwhelmed and anxious, thought about my therapist and being in his office which for me is a safe environment. Sometimes that is what I hang onto in times of crisis. I am not sure if this is the same sort of thing that you are describing.

You mention that you have discussed these constant fantasies with your therapist quite a bit and I was wondering what feedback you have gotten from him. Has he offered any thoughts as to why this could be happening?
 

ThatLady

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Do you tend to be a fantasizer anyway, pocono, or is this something new for you?
 

pocono

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In general, I'm not a heavy fantasizer. I would say over the years I have had fantasies like the ones I now have about other men on and off -- but not nearly with the same frequency and intensity since I've entered therapy.

My therapist treats them a lot like dreams. He thinks they are part of the "working though" process. They don't seem to upset him, and he is always interested in them the way he is interested in my dreams.
 

ThatLady

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Since you have discussed these fantasies with your therapist and he's not concerned about them, you probably needn't be, either. They are probably just as he says - a way of working through some of the difficult problems you're dealing with. As you work through these problems, the fantasies will probably begin to lessen.

I can imagine they're kinda scary, if you're not normally one to fantasize. Yet, they're harmless, and probably offer your subconscious mind some sense of safety and security.
 

Halo

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Pocono,

I agree with TL here. If your therapist is not that concerned about the fantasies and sees them more as dreams then you probably shouldn't be concerned with them either. I know that is probably hard because it is what you are focusing on a lot but at least you are able to discuss them with your therapist and let him know how you are feeling and that in itself is a plus.

Take care
:hug:
 
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YAY!!!
i know that i am not alone!!! YAY!!!
sorry i know that this post is in no way helpful to you, but YAY! i was too scared of what people would say if i posted it!
 

Halo

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Xbeautifullyxbrokenx

I think that is one of the best things about this forum. No matter what you post there more often than not is someone else on here that feels the exact same way you do and it is quite a relief to see that you are not alone.

Sometimes I may have hesitations about posting something on here about myself but then I always think that that if I am feeling a certain way and worrying or obssessing about something then it is quite likely that there is someone else on here thinking the same thing so it may help to know that I am not alone and someone else can feel that they are not alone as well.

I know that it is still scary to post certain things but that is the great thing about this forum is that we are not judgmental, we are supportive, caring and understanding.

I say post away and in turn you are probably helping someone else at the same time.

Take care
 

braveheart

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pocono, I have fantasies about my therapist also, as a coping mechanism. I have an analytic oriented therapist, and we work intensely with my fantasies. Its hard work, but I grow emotionally through it, learning to distinguish fantasy from reality.
 

comfortzone

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I believe that the fantasies are not abnormal. I believe that (like mentioned above) these fantasies (dreams) are information that can be worked through and used to continue in the process of achieving a corrective emotional experience. Take care.
 

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