Friends

[PlaneswalkerZacron]

I hate it when friends that I am not close to try to criticize or care for me more than I think they should , I don't know but I think I am a pretty close-hearted(not sure if right word) person although I joke around I usually prefer superficial relationships unless I feel safe enough to go further,so I usually don't involve or ask about other people's business and i feel intruded when people do what I said just now.Any opinions?

 

[forgetmenot]

No one should be criticizing your for anything unless you ask for their opinions, As with regard for them caring for you well that is a trust issue i think. I am uncomfortable with anyone showing kindness i question their motives for it so perhaps as you say when you get to know that person better you will not feel it as an intrusion

 

[PlaneswalkerZacron]

I felt intruded maybe because I rarely comment about other people , and when certain people do that to me, I felt that there is this imbalance. As if I am restricted by a rule to not touch personal boundary of another person but the other person is not.

 

[forgetmenot]

You understand what personal boundaries are and perhaps the other person does not It is important to talk to that person and let them know what your boundaries are ok so they do not cross them. Hard to when you feel intruded upon but maybe when talking to the other person you will see that they only meant to help you not cause anxiety or harm

 

[PlaneswalkerZacron]

I hate that while I and those friends are not exactly close ,they try to be genuine? with me ,I don't want it! People complain about not having true friends while I couldn't stand someone just come in my life and sort of want me to open up .As soon as someone I am not that close to try to be close to me while I am not that interested to them ,I just feel fed up and don't want to be with them anymore.

 

[forgetmenot]

I don't understand friendship really i too don't feel comfortable with letting anyone in anyone close especially new people.

You have to either give them time to get to know you before you push them away or You can be honest with them say you are not comfortable opening up but in time you may be able to open up some

I do prefer now to keep a distance it keeps me safe you have to equal it out i guess comfort safety or dealing with the comfortableness some so you can build up more friends Your choice right.

---------- Post Merged at 10:33 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 11:05 AM ----------

Should say dealing with the uncomfortable feelings some

 

[ethanbridges]

I think it's alright to distance yourself from others if you don't actually feel comfortable not doing so. Otherwise, it's torture. But needless to say, we all need friends. Try examining yourself especially on parts of yourself you can "compromise" so you can have more interaction with other people. I say this because you may actually enjoy the company of others, while not minding much about intrusion, than when you distance yourself and be rather alone. You can try. But whatever your preferences are, my 2 cents is we need some good friends.