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Mayel

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Hi,

I'm here because I'm interested in psychology but I'm also here since I would like to know, if I've got a disorder of some kind or whatever else.

Ever since I was an outsider, even in kinder garden: But I more or less chose to be out of groups, I prefer solitary activities over all, further I think that most people if not all are only engaging in meaningless,superficial talks. These social events like parties or meetings are just more than boring to me.

I've got only one to two friends, I'm not sure but surely I'm quite happy having some stable contact with them(almost only through non-personal contact forms:e-mail,chatting).
I almost always consider nobody to be my friend and I easily can break up contact with people I hung out with.

I don't enjoy any social events,so I mostly stay at home all the time and read,learn, but I've engage in music and arts, too.

Most people around me think of me as cold,detached and weird, having weird ways of talking and dressing: People that do like me ,well they think of me as a normal person with good social skills. People knowing me well know that I can't use words very well to express myself.

I'm quite proud of being considered "odd" , since I don't want to be like the majority which I frankly consider not to be very smart or just liking totally different things than me, which bores me.

I don't consider myself super smart or something similar but I know which interests I have and which things I like. This may seem very arrogant and narcissistic but I can't avoid these thoughts as they have proven themselves to be right too many times(not every one understands the others).

Being bored is, too an issue: I don't seem to feel good or sad or bad most of the time.
I think very often about existence,not it's meaning but it's state: I believe that I would not be happy with a normal job and a normal life (a family a house a job you go to every day)this would bore me out of my mind.

I'm currently studying and this does not bore me that much,but I wouldn't like to do this my whole life (besides it's not possible to study your whole life as a student).

It's like there is almost nothing that can bring true satisfaction to me: I always have hopes in research in any thing that could help humanity as a task just to see if this would satisfy me, to help, instead of just living.

On the other hand this may not be very rewarding as my interests lie in arts and music and may make me happy of some sort or relaxed but these got no future and there is no good reason that they could bring me an existential satisfaction,too.(but then again it's really unimportant if something makes you happy or satisfied, as long as you live, that's what I think,as well).

That's enough for a description of myself. It's not that I want help since I don't want to change but I just want to know if there is a name or names for all this,then I would do further research on this.

OK, thank you for reading, I appreciate every comment.
 

Halo

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Re: hi as usual

Hi Mayel and welcome to Psychlinks :welcome2:

I am glad that you decided to join us and I hope to see you around :wave:
 

Retired

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Re: hi as usual

Welcome to Psychlinks, Mayel! Hope you find the info you're looking for here. Feel free to join in any ongoing discussion or start one of your own.
 

Daniel

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Re: hi as usual

Welcome to PsychLinks, Mayel! :welcome:

Mayel said:
Being bored is, too an issue: I don't seem to feel good or sad or bad most of the time.

Boredom can be a helpful catalyst:

The researchers suggest treating boredom as an opportunity to “discover the possibility and content of one’s desires”.

Boredom comes from not knowing ourselves - Psychlinks Psychology and Self-Help Forum

Mayel said:
I would like to know, if I've got a disorder of somekind or whatever else.
Mayel said:
It's like there is almost nothing that can bring true satisfaction to me:

I would recommend getting some psychological screening done for depression or other mental health issues. (Most universities offer such mental health services, including mental health counseling, at no additional cost to their students.)

In varying degrees, most young adults go through some form of adjustment period from adolescence to adulthood and are trying to "find themselves." In the last few decades, the transition period from adolescence to adulthood has taken longer, resulting in what sociologists call "transitional adulthood:"

The shape of life for those between 18 and 34 has changed so profoundly that many social scientists now think of those years as a new life stage, ''transitional adulthood'' -- just as, a century ago, they recognized adolescence as a life stage separating childhood from adulthood.

For More People in 20's and 30's, Home Is Where the Parents Are - New York Times

What concerns me is your social isolation since that is a risk factor for depression. In Japan, for example, such social isolation among young adults is an epidemic, resulting in a national mental health crisis:

Hikikomori - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Shutting Out the Sun - Hikikomori - Japanese Culture

In the West, social isolation is also contributing to depression and arrested adulthood.
 
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ladylore

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Welcome Mayel :welcome:

Feeling disconnected to the world can be a symptom of depression. I agree with Daniel that the only way to know if you have depression or something else is going on is to be screened. Going to your doctor is the first step. He/she may recommend then that talking with a therapist may help.

It's not that I want help since I don't want to change but I just want to know if there is a name or names for all this,then I would do further research on this.

Talking with someone can also help you put a name to it. :)

Unfortunately, a diagnosis can't be made over a computer so your best bet would be to make an appointment with your doctor.

Glad you found us.
 

dark

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Hi,I'm here because Im interested in psychology but I'm also here since I would like to know, if I've got a disorder of somekind or whatever else....Ever since I was an outisder, even in kinder garden: But I more or less chose to be out of groups, I prefere solitary activities over all, further I think that most people if not all are only engaging in meaningless,superficial talks.
These social events like parties or meetings are just more than boring to me.
I've got only one to two friends, I'm not sure but surely I'm quite happy having some stable contact with them(almost only through unpersonal contact forms:e-mail,chatting).
I almost always consider nobody to be my friend and I easily can break up contact with people I hung out with.
I don't enjoy any social events,so I mostly stay at home all the time and read,learn, but I've engage in music and arts, too.

Gosh, you sound a lot like me, especially regarding arts and music, although I'm rarely bored.

Anyway, welcome!
 

Mayel

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Thank you for your hints and recomendations, and for the welcoming.
I think I have been through a depression once: I've slept all day long and only woke up to eat or go to school, so I think that won't happen again, many years have passed since.
But there are good ideas in your posts,so I will take a look.
 

Mayel

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Reading the articel about "boredom": I see that boredom seems to be a state were you feel you have nothing interesting to do.
But I do a lot of things,and Im interested in very many things and as seen above even want to do things that need very much work to be achieved; I even don't have enough time to do all things I liked to do.
But they don't make me feel fulfilled, they relax me, make me forget everything around me.
If I look at other people they don't seem to feel anything,as well: It's just my theory that our constant state of being is a blank paper but maybe that's just me and my imagination.

And I think my boredom comes just out of idealism: I would like to see the world changed, a warm place where everyone can live,a connected world,as the universe is in essence a connected "place":
Seeing that certainly most people just sit there and do their work which is not at all concerned with helping others, I don't want to be part of this mass, too, as I see that this makes no sense for me.
Researching for anything that could help others would relieve my consciousness but I know that this would one: make the world worse ,two: nothing would happen or three: would help only a tiny little bit meaning so much as nothing.
I think this example sums it up: a living empty, something that has constantly to be filled, just for some happiness,being in the search of "true happiness", whatever this means.
So maybe it's true that boredom can be a catalyst but it's also my consciousness and my way of viewing the universe.
All this is not bad at all,in my point of view, I was once depressed because of my isolation but now I've constructed my own views, my own philosophy which isolate me(not completly) but which at least does not make me feel sad or depressed as being part of the mass would make me feel depressed and more than bored, now Im just feeling neutral or I don't know how to call my feelings, so I say that this is boredom.
 

Daniel

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Mayel said:
I would like to see the world changed, a warm place where everyone can live,a connected world,as the universe is in essence a connected "place":

Many people of college age feel the same way.

Mayel said:
most people just sit there and do their work which is not at all concerned with helping others, I don't want to be part of this mass, too, as I see that this makes no sense for me.

Are you talking about college students? Generally speaking, college students tend to be one of the most socially active groups when it comes to volunteering:

Altogether, about 30 percent of college students are volunteering, with tutoring and mentoring the most common activities.

Volunteer spirit among college set - CNN.com

Most campus-based social clubs engage in some form of volunteering. While some students even join the Peace Corps, even the college students that don't volunteer in formal ways are likely helping their friends (reciprocal altruism) and are -- whether they know it or not -- helping society by becoming educated. Many college students feel overwhelmed as it is, with about 1 in 10 college students having thoughts of suicide.

Perhaps, partly due to the social isolation, some of your thoughts tend towards all-or-nothing thinking, discounting the positive, etc.?

The Ten Forms of Twisted Thinking - Psychlinks Psychology and Self-Help Forum
 
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Mayel

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Are you talking about college students? Generally speaking, college students tend to be one of the most socially active groups when it comes to volunteering:
No,Im talking about the public in general, all over the world. Not any specific group in particular.

Looking at the state of the world in general, this won't give me the impression that every thing is ok and that it's just the course of time and destiny and that there exist enough people in this world engaging in improvement.

Maybe I just met the wrong people,but most where like saying "as long as Im ok everything is fine".

Im a misanthrope and a philantropist at the same time, Im selfish(have consumating interests and do nothing actively) but I am studying and learning to "do" anything that could be good and at least not bad for anyone,too.

Maybe I do the latter just to fill my isolation with meaning, but it's not bad as far as I know.

And I'm not discounting the positive but it's not enough,not at all and I may be overgenralizing but because of certain reasons and Im not thinking everyone is bad(I know this is not true) but I know too few people sharing thoughts or interests with me, and too many that do everything I don't like because of certain reasons which in turn leads to this "not enough" thinking.
 

Daniel

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Have you considered joining a college club about your interests? Most universities have a variety of college clubs in arts, music, philosophy, astronomy, etc. -- I think most majors have a club that is open to all students and there are also the Greek-lettered honors and social societies. If you are a vegetarian, there is a club for that, too. There is probably at least one club with a focus on international affairs.
 

Mayel

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Well, anyways,
Thank you for the links, I'll read them.Maybe Im really only having "college students"-thoughts.
Screening can't be done here,right, and Im sorry for my double-posts but I often write/speak before I think it all through.
I have, but Im too lazy to get out of the house besides having no time for this on a larger scale due to too much learning for tests.
Im in a band (recently we are having a little break) if this "helps".
 

Daniel

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Mayel said:
Screening can't be done here,right,
Right.

Mayel said:
Maybe Im really only having "college students"-thoughts.

Well, I would point out that one doesn't need a diagnosable mental disorder to benefit from mental health counseling/therapy. For example, my best friend in college-- who didn't have clinical depression -- said he benefited from a few visits to the mental health center at the university. There's also an emphasis now on positive psychology.

I am not as familiar with the undergrad experience as I used to be, but there was a study of 3,000 graduate students at Berkeley that showed that 54 percent of the students reported feeling depressed enough at one point that it interfered with their ability to function:

95 percent felt overwhelmed in graduate school, and 54 percent said they had felt so "depressed that it was difficult to function." About 10 percent had seriously considered suicide, and one in 200 had actually attempted suicide in the last year.

The Berkeley study cites dysfunctional relationships with faculty advisers, significant family responsibilities, financial difficulties, isolation from campus life and student resources, and an inability to recognize the symptoms of a psychological problem as possible reasons for graduate students' declining mental health.

http://chronicle.com/jobs/2005/03/2005032401c.htm
 

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