I don't know too much about PTSD, but I remember once my therapist mentioning that I might develope this later on.
I have suffered a great amount of stress in the past year while trying to take care of my boyfriend who developed paranoid schizophrenia. It happened really slowly as well, so sometimes I wonder how long I was subjected to his distorted thinking. I think it has seriously affected my approach to romantic relationships, mainly because I am absolutely afraid of committment and refuse to date any guy that would act jealously towards me. Of course this is because one of my ex's conspiracy theories centered upon this theme. He made me feel so terribly guilty, suggesting that I had tormented him for months, unconsciously giving him the idea that I was being sexually abused. At one point he even felt that I was making internet pornography with this brother. Even now he will write me text messages with sexually explicit language, and I find it really startelling and disconserting.
I guess, the main reason I am writing though, is because I've been so emotional lately.. I have trouble eating, sleeping, concentrating, and often find myself exploding at people. I get sooo.. angry. I don't know how to deal any other way. Which is not so big of a deal, but I am beginning to worry because it seems that I tend to overreact. I catch myself making predictions and feel convinced that I can almost "read" peoples minds by their facial expressions and body language. Not to mention clues.
I've yelled at my dad, at my boss, at strangers, and recently at the guy I am dating. I get so confused. I just don't know what to think sometimes, and I feel like my mind churns forever, and my thoughts and feelings have evolved dramatically over the course of just a couple of weeks.
I have suffered a great amount of stress in the past year while trying to take care of my boyfriend who developed paranoid schizophrenia. It happened really slowly as well, so sometimes I wonder how long I was subjected to his distorted thinking. I think it has seriously affected my approach to romantic relationships, mainly because I am absolutely afraid of committment and refuse to date any guy that would act jealously towards me. Of course this is because one of my ex's conspiracy theories centered upon this theme. He made me feel so terribly guilty, suggesting that I had tormented him for months, unconsciously giving him the idea that I was being sexually abused. At one point he even felt that I was making internet pornography with this brother. Even now he will write me text messages with sexually explicit language, and I find it really startelling and disconserting.
I guess, the main reason I am writing though, is because I've been so emotional lately.. I have trouble eating, sleeping, concentrating, and often find myself exploding at people. I get sooo.. angry. I don't know how to deal any other way. Which is not so big of a deal, but I am beginning to worry because it seems that I tend to overreact. I catch myself making predictions and feel convinced that I can almost "read" peoples minds by their facial expressions and body language. Not to mention clues.
I've yelled at my dad, at my boss, at strangers, and recently at the guy I am dating. I get so confused. I just don't know what to think sometimes, and I feel like my mind churns forever, and my thoughts and feelings have evolved dramatically over the course of just a couple of weeks.
