More threads by Curious


She had Lymph-edema which became cancer and caused her to have a heart attack and a stroke. She passed away last Saturday. I am in a serious mental state from it. I am alone, but my family is with me in another city. I will on the last day of the month go to live with them in Georgia. This is the worst thing that could happen with me. I am seventy three and hurting. I can't seem to stay calm without my medicine for my emotion. I will seek a doctor when I leave here in North Carolina. My friends here are supportive of me, yet my emotions control me and not vice versa. Will this emotion ever heal? Curious One/ Paul


MVP, Forum Supporter
Re: I Lost My Wife.

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your wife. It is heartening to hear that you have the support of your friends and family. Healing from your grief will take time so have patience with yourself.


Re: I Lost My Wife.

My deepest condolences Paul on the passing of your wife. I cannot imagine the grief and sorrow you must be experiencing and hopefully with the support of your family and friends you will find a way to get through this difficult time. If your doctor has prescribed medication to help manage your emotions and anxiety, use the medication as was prescribed, but most important is that you take care of yourself.

Be sure to eat regularly, even if you don't have much appetite, just have a little along with plenty of water and try to get a good night's sleep.

Will this emotion ever heal?

Paul, in time the pain of this tremendous loss will subside with the help and support of your family and friends, but what will never leave you are the wonderful memories you and your wife shared all those years.

Reach out to whatever local support you have available, because this is the time family and friends come together. Ask for help from friends and family to do the things that need to be done in the coming weeks.

We are here for you, so do continue the conversation and keep us posted on your progress.

What part of Georgia will you be moving to?


I'm so sorry for your loss. Know that grief has no timetable, and take all the time you need to grieve. It is a deeply personal experience that will take time.

Take care of yourself during this difficult period.


MVP, Forum Supporter
I am so very sorry for your loss, Paul.

Please know that very very difficult emotions are natural during grief, and at other times too.

Our thoughts and kindness are always with you during your very difficult emotions.

One thing that can be a tiny bit helpful to survive it, is to know that these very very difficult emotions tend to come in waves. Sometimes something that helps get through them is remembering that these very big emotional waves will wash over us and feel so very hard, but then will pass for a time until a bit later.

These deeply difficult emotional waves will be very strong and very hard for a while. But in between them they will ease a little. After a little while, they start to become a little easier and further apart.

Compassionately let the feelings flow through you when they come, let yourself cry or scream, and let yourself say anything you feel like saying or writing... let feelings come out however you might wish to. You are not alone in those times as we are thinking of you often and sending our thoughts of care to you...

We are here Paul and when you are ready, talking about things some more anytime that you want to can also help you during all the confusing and as Turtle says, very individual and personal, feelings and experiences of a very difficult loss.

Will be thinking of you Paul.
There is no timetable for grief. Some days will feel like yuck; others, will feel like you are in a hazy fog from which you will muddle through. I am encouraged that you have the support of family to assist you. This is very helpful and important. Feel free to share your concerns here.


Take one day--even one hour--at a time. Do stay with friends and family. Yes, with time, your feelings about this will become less unbearable. They won't go away, but you will be able to steer them, rather than being steered by them.
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