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    "Worrying is like a rocking chair: It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you anywhere."
    Van Wilder, posted by Daniel

SadGirl

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Whenever I think for a moment about starting to do some task, I just get super stressed, then i get a throbbing headache and then i just want to lie in bed and do nothing...whats wrong with me????
 

Retired

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Whenever I think for a moment about starting to do some task, I just get super stressed

What are the thoughts that go through your mind that result in the super stress? Other than a headache, do you experience any other physical manifestations that make you feel uncomfortable?

May I ask if this reaction is a recent change in the way you ordinarily function or have you noticed this kind of reaction for some time?
 

SadGirl

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i get scared and overwhelmed...i get sad and numb and sort of paralyzed....
 

Eunoia

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I guess the part about your becoming overwhelmed explains a lot of it. It sounds like you get so overwhelmed thinking about doing the task that you worry yourself physically ill and thus are completely unable to even start doing it... do you worry about failing at the task? Are you under a lot of time pressure? Does the task (whatever it is) remind of you of something unpleasant? In a way, we have our defense mechanisms and in order to deal w/ stress or anxiety or fear of something we kind of shut down to keep that all out, but obviously if that prevents you from consistantly accomplishing tasks, there's a bigger problem.... as much as we want to accomplish things, the thought of all the things we have to do and possibly failure can be so much worse than actually getting started and seeing what will happen, so even though by not doing anything the problem isn't resolved, it is a way to avoid the possible outcome of something much worse... do you think this could be connected to being depressed? Having difficulty motivating yourself, being able to concentrate, finding the energy to do things you used to be able to do....? I think talking to someone would help to work out some ideas about how to be able to at least get the things done you need to do or that mean the most to you, and for yourself, maybe breaking the task down into smaller pieces might help make it seem less overwhelming. Start w/ point A, then go on to point B, etc. and set yourself some kind of time limit for each, ie. "I want to have "A" done by the end of today" and try to work towards that (but be realistic). Maybe get someone else to help you get things started (again, depending on what the task is). Remember, that you can only do so much, don't try to do too much at once or in a day, that'll definitely add to the overall stress too... good luck!
 

SadGirl

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Yes I just get scared, I get scared when I approach anything, I am afraid of failing, I am afraid of all that goes into it, i am afraid of making the wrong choice, soon i just get depressed and crawl back into bed......

I also hate it when ppl compliment me, you are so nice, you are so smart...its like a knife down my side...its too much pressure, then i get stressed and then I wanna crawl back into bed
 

Eunoia

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hun, you said in another post that you were diagnosed w/ dysthymia... all of that you describe sounds a lot like being connected to that..... are you seeing someone though, like a therapist to help you w/ all of this??? I don't know what the exact quote is, but it's something about if you never go and try to accomplish things or see what's out there b/c you are afraid to fail, you will never actually see what could happen b/c you don't give it a chance. I'm not saying it's this simplistic, but it makes sense, like if you would want to dye your hair and would never actually do it b/c you're afraid of it looking bad then you'd never know, right? (I know these aren't the same things, just an analogy). Take comfort in the fact that sometimes, yes, you can fail, but a lot of the time you won't fail completely, so you may study for a test and not get that A but you would probably do a whole lot better than not studying at all, right? It's the effort that counts, and any effort that you can come up w/ right now, as it sounds from things, is a great 1st start.... I really do think that you need the help of someone else though.

I also hate it when ppl compliment me, you are so nice, you are so smart...its like a knife down my side...its too much pressure, then i get stressed
People know that by complimenting others it will take them a long way, but some of those comments are actually at least partly true. You would never say to someone who isn't very smart, "oh, you're so smart", right? And an objective opinion might be a lot more accurate than what you see for yourself... we tend to be harder on ourselves and our own worst judge but as much as you don't like people saying those things, try to at least take them in a bit, if you can't believe those things about you maybe having others say them can make you see that there must be some truth to them. I know what you mean though, like how could someone say those things if that's not at all what you feel like inside, right? They're not trying to put pressure on you, that's you interpreting what they're saying as something to live up to, but they're saying it b/c you have already lived up to that, as much as you can't or don't want to see that.
 

SadGirl

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Help me

Help. From the second I wake up my mind is neverending with fear and panick and bad memories and it doesnt stop! All of my energy and concentration goes into dealing with all these thoughts! Help Me!
 

SadGirl

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I hate myself and my life

I hate myself and my life. I get jealous of everyone, even celebrities and kids. I hate me.
 

Daniel

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Are you in therapy already or considering therapy?

Some things that have helped my depression/anxiety:
- therapy
- aerobic exercise
- writing a list of everything positive or pleasurable in my life
- being stimulated by college, hobbies, friends, work, etc.
- being distracted by music, movies, the Internet, etc.
- the passage of time and learning to take one day at a time
- realizing that many people aren't exactly overflowing with happiness, e.g. many people don't like their jobs.

Related websites:
UndoingDepression.com
Articles on Self-Esteem by Nathaniel Branden
PsychLinks: Self-Help Exercises & Readings
 

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