- Aug 13, 2006
When I met with my therapist last week, he asked me to begin to put together a collection of memories from my earlies memory forward so that we can begin to establish a timeline and some cohesion around my life's history. I started to do so, but it is so incredibly hard. I start writing and am becoming more and more panicked and then start floating. I am shaking even as I write this - it's like your life takes away your ability to go on even if it's only recounting it. I keep hearing commands to stop, to be quiet, to shut up in my head and I am so afraid. It's like I'm programmed to shut up. I have never done this and I wanted to know if anyone else has had to do this and if this is what they went through. I feel so lost that I don't know how to cope anymore.