Panic triggered by being tired

[BluMac81]

Man I am just so sick of this. Since 2004 I get in these states in which if I don't get enough sleep (am tired thorughout the day) I get anxious and eventually get into a panic state about not being able to sleep the following night. In fear that not being able to sleep will greatly impair all areas of my life and possibly cause me to go insane. I know that its an irrational fear but I can't get seem to get rid of it! I guess it's like an irrational phobia.

I just need help today, might call the suicide hotline cause when i panic i SI. Its just cause I went to bed at 1:30am and woke up at 5:30am and couldnt get back to sleep. Lunesta (and Ambien CR) cured this but the VA is so cheap they wont provide those drugs so have me on Ambien and Temazapam... and Xanax. God so sick of this. Its like as soon as my body fills physiologically tired I am immediately anxious and panicy about the being able to sleep the next night. God I feel so stupid I know plenty of people that deal with living off of 4 hour sleep quite often yet I am the one who freaks out about it. Arrrgh.

I think this needs to be treated like a phobia. Like not-being-able-to-sleep phobia... so how do you treat phobias?

 

[lallieth]

Hi Blu

Have you eliminated food based stimulants from your diet..IE coffee,chocolate,loads of sugar etc? These things tend to bring on anxiety for me...just a thought.If I have a strong cup of regular coffee the evening before,I am pretty much setting myself up to have anxiety the next morning

I realize that when we don't get enough sleep,our brains tend to work overtime and that adds to the problem.

Man I am just so sick of this. Since 2004 I get in these states in which if I don't get enough sleep (am tired thorughout the day) I get anxious and eventually get into a panic state about not being able to sleep the following night. In fear that not being able to sleep will greatly impair all areas of my life and possibly cause me to go insane. I know that its an irrational fear but I can't get seem to get rid of it! I guess it's like an irrational phobia.

I just need help today, might call the suicide hotline cause when i panic i SI. Its just cause I went to bed at 1:30am and woke up at 5:30am and couldnt get back to sleep. Lunesta (and Ambien CR) cured this but the VA is so cheap they wont provide those drugs so have me on Ambien and Temazapam... and Xanax. God so sick of this. Its like as soon as my body fills physiologically tired I am immediately anxious and panicy about the being able to sleep the next night. God I feel so stupid I know plenty of people that deal with living off of 4 hour sleep quite often yet I am the one who freaks out about it. Arrrgh.

I think this needs to be treated like a phobia. Like not-being-able-to-sleep phobia... so how do you treat phobias?

 

[ladylore]

First off BluMac you are not insane. I do know the frustration though of getting too little sleep.

Here is a bit of Behavioural Therapy - think of this as a time when the world is quiet and you can read a good book, make yourself a cup of tea or hot milk and honey. Relax and enjoy the quiet.

You may want to start giving yourself a regular bedtime, if you haven't already. Do the same relaxing routine before you go to bed. This way your brain will get use to the bedtime and will adjust your inner clock to the time you are to get some needed rest.

If you wake up in the middle of the night, again read a boring book...but nothing that will wake you up, like exercise.

It really is the way we percieve things. Most of the time anyhow.

Hope some of this helps.

 

[BluMac81]

I know, I know Ladylore, and thank you.
Been told that advice several times but honestly once the thought process starts it just exponentially compounds on itself.

At the point now where I am crying uncntrollably and <removed> That and I took 3mg xanax, 30 mg temazapam and 20mg ambien.

I have had had lots of alchohol and nicotine and caffine today so that could be a contributing factor. Everything right now seems so overwhelming, everything in my life as a whole. And the thought of suicide has crossed my mind tonight...

I'm gonna call the hotline...

 

[Into The Light]

blumac how badly have you injured yourself? dangerously so?

also i am not sure but is the combination of medication you took one that you shouldn't have? i see you are over the recommended max. dosage for ambien.

do make sure you call the hotline and talk to someone. i am concerned about you.

 

[BluMac81]

blumac how badly have you injured yourself? dangerously so?

also i am not sure but is the combination of medication you took one that you shouldn't have? i see you are over the recommended max. dosage for ambien.

do make sure you call the hotline and talk to someone. i am concerned about you.

Yes just got off the phone, it made me feel a bit better.


Seriously I don't know where this come from (other than being sleep deprived) but when it hits, it hits massively hard. Might have something to do with the huge number of to-do's I have on my list that never seem to get done and I'm just so disappointed at myself at not getting them done.

The injury to myself is not nothing major, you know, [[edit: potential trigger]], and it acts as a form of crying, of getting things out for me.

Don't worry about me. I see my psychologist on Monday if only she doesnt cancel on me YET AGAIN. And the psychiatrist on the 17th.

Is this common or am I a freak of nature.

 

[Into The Light]

you are not a freak of nature. you are just someone who struggles with anxiety and depression.

i know you are feeling overwhelmed right now and that it's hard to see beyond the moment. but you are not going to feel like this forever, this will pass, and your system will calm down again.

have you gone through something like this before and if so, what tools did your therapist offer you to help cope?

 

[Into The Light]

i forgot to mention your to do list. you have way too much on it. i felt overwhelmed just reading it when you listed items in one of your posts not too long ago.

i think what would help you rather than stress you out is if you take that list, and only pick one or two things for you to complete. that way it's a realistic goal, one that is attainable, and you will feel like you actually accomplished something. otherwise you are just setting yourself up for disappointment and exhaustion. you don't need that extra stress in your life.

 

[BluMac81]

you are not a freak of nature. you are just someone who struggles with anxiety and depression.

i know you are feeling overwhelmed right now and that it's hard to see beyond the moment. but you are not going to feel like this forever, this will pass, and your system will calm down again.

have you gone through something like this before and if so, what tools did your therapist offer you to help cope?

Yep there really are two things that get me by in times like these, is that EVERYTHING IS SUBJECT TO CHANGE, or everything WILL change, that is a give in. So if I just wait, how ever many sleepless nights they may be, it'll get better. So thank you for reminding me of that

 

[Into The Light]

just keep reminding yourself of that. things do change. keep repeating that to yourself.

i know one time when i had a panic attack they let me work it out for myself. i kept telling myself over and over again to just hang on a little longer. just a few more minutes is all i kept saying. and eventually the horrible feeling did go away. maybe this is something that would work for you.

 

[BluMac81]

i forgot to mention your to do list. you have way too much on it. i felt overwhelmed just reading it when you listed items in one of your posts not too long ago.

i think what would help you rather than stress you out is if you take that list, and only pick one or two things for you to complete. that way it's a realistic goal, one that is attainable, and you will feel like you actually accomplished something. otherwise you are just setting yourself up for disappointment and exhaustion. you don't need that extra stress in your life.

Yep. Makes total sense. A former psycologist I saw suggested that. I tried that, but became nervous / restless /agitated at the fact that there most likely things not getting done that should be done now. Heh... she also called me a like a version of a 'puritan', people who punish themselves physically when they have done wrong. When I don't get all the things on my list done, I'll do the right thing and just move them to the next day.... but by the end of the week realizing that I hardly got anyhing done, that is when I punish myself... i'm too lazy.... or i'm too inefficient...and oh so many other flaws i can find with myself.

 

[Into The Light]

it's so easy to find fault with things, with ourselves. but what does it buy you? it's not going to make you do any better, or help you get more on the list done. all it does is make you feel badly.

you could go through your list, one by one, and decide for each item how badly it needs to be done. question why you feel it needs to be done and what it would mean if you didn't do it. then - could you live with the result of not doing it? if yes - discard it, if no - ask yourself why you can't live with that result. if it ends up reflecting something about you, your worth as a person then you really need to apply some cbt there. if it ends up being something like "not taking the trash out means soon the house will be attracting mice" then obviously it's not something to take off the list

 

[ladylore]

I apologise BluMac. I didn't realize you were and are dealing with depression. I read the rest of the thread this morning when I got up. I am glad you called the crisis line and reached out further here.

 

[BluMac81]

It helped. And so did you ladylore and into the light, I slept well and it's a new day, and I'm feeling fine.