The weight of two

[desiderata]

I believe there are many who can relate with me. A bout with any mental issue you may have can also effect those closest to you in the same way. For instance, every so often I still get very depressed. Never to the point where I would hurt myself or anyone else but pretty down. My wife picks up my vibe and I usually tell her its just a period I have to work through and that I'll pull through shortly. And I always do. However, people are who they are and my wife takes things personally and her mood dwindles with time. I therefore feel the weight of the two of us. It puts the onus on me causing guilt I don't need. I'm not saying anyone is to blame but that knowledge and understanding can go a long way.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I have used the analogy of "going into the cave to heal".

Many people prone to depression or anxiety periodically need to retreat from the world to lick their wounds and heal without the distractions of other people and events swirling around them. I think this is probably especially true for introverts, and the concept may be difficult for extraverts to fully understand.

I have found it helpful to explain this to other people I care about and those who care about me: friends, family, and relationships. I try to emphasize that it is temporary and to reassure the other persons in my life that it has nothing to do with them or with anything they have said or done. It is simply about healing and getting through the dark tunnel of depression or anxiety as quickly as possible, that when I don't go into the cave everything just takes much longer to heal. I also emphasize that I know it's difficult for other people to understand but that I ask them to trust my experience in this, that I will be back to normal soon. And I give them the opportunity to ask whatever questions they may have to help them understand the process.

This is usually best done at a time when you are feeling relatively okay, not when you are already retreating into the cave.

 

[desiderata]

Most likely the best reply I have received.