Want someone to tell me

[Cat Dancer]

what to weigh and what and when to eat and that it is ok to eat. I really wish I had someone with me all the time to help me because I have NO idea how to take care of myself this way. I'm getting in bad shape again and I don't want to, but I do want to. It's hard and I am so tired. I hate this. It's not control. It's out of control.

 

[adaptive1]

I so feel the same today, so I sympathize. All day I have been trying not to eat because that's what my brain is telling me...but on some level I know it's not right and that I need to take care of myself and not listen to that part of my brain that has these negative thoughts.

 

[Cat Dancer]

It's weird. If someone could just help me. I am an adult and I don't know how to eat right. It's a struggle. A hard struggle. I'm sorry you struggle too.

 

[adaptive1]

Thanks CD...I know what you mean. I think we do know how, it's just a matter of doing it and not listening to those voices.

 

[Cat Dancer]

But I've never, that I can remember, eaten normally. I need someone to help me figure out all the numbers. The numbers are too confusing.

 

[adaptive1]

I know, I think we over complicate it by worrying about numbers, a dietician told me to eat three meals a day and a couple of snacks and not obsess about numbers. I haven't mastered the art of not obsessing yet but on a good day I just try to ignore the calorie numbers and eat something at those times.

 

[Meg]

Have you ever seen a dietician, CD?

 

[MHealthJo]

Wonder if the numbers are just a red herring, and a way for the ED to try to grab control, even when you try to do what's good for you and eat...?

Most people I know who eat well and stay healthy just do not give any thought to the numbers at all... no weighing, no counting, no measuring, no looking at content.

They just eat regularly and try to include a variety of different things, making sure that over the week they get veg, fruit, grain, protien, and some fat.

I know it is not reasonable to expect one's mind to make sudden changes with full success and no anxiety.... But I think it's important to remember that the 'numbers' side of things is just not a necessary
part of healthy eating.....

Hugs xx

 

[Cat Dancer]

I'm not sure how tto make the numbers NOT matter. I really want that though. But they are HUGE to me. I think this is the most selfish disorder in the world. It causes me to be so self centered and self focused. It takes up most of my energy. I really wonder if I wouldn't just be better off dead. Seriously you all don't even know how bad it is.

 

[MHealthJo]

I really don't think it is something that can be truly comprehended by a non-sufferer.

I think these awfully difficult things have gotta be used as a motivation to work to discard the ED though... not to discard life.

Wondering, what does the book have to say regarding how to get started in ignoring these thoughts and coping with ignoring them?

xx

 

[Ashley-Kate]

someone to be there to say what is normal what is not how much exercise or what is too much, someone to draw out what is ok and help to remain inside those boundaries. i know how you feel .. it sucks to have that control because its soo easy to lose and in my case i feel i should not be the one that has that control in my hands. i want to be an adult to live as an adult but i dont want to have to make those decisions.