David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
Cuddle Spray: Viagra for His Emotions
May 11, 2010
A constant complaint we girls have is that men ?don?t talk,? that they ?never tell us how they really feel,? and anyone who?s ever interacted with a dude knows its pretty unusual to see one cry. And sometimes that gets frustrating and we just want our guy to share his emotions. We don?t want to date a robot; we want a guy with feelings. We know they?re in there somewhere and we just need a little somethin? somethin? to bring ?em out.
Well, now there is that something. And it?s not a viewing of Field of Dreams. Scientists have been working furiously and finally come up with a solution to this very real problem:
Introducing Cuddle Spray a hormone-laced nasal spray developed by Universities of Oxford and Bonn.
I won?t bore you by telling you how it uses neuropeptide oxycotin, and how half of the forty-eight men they tested it on expressed their feelings more. And I won?t touch the subject of how the male participants had increased emotional empathy, either. You can read more about that later.
What I will talk about, however, is the commercial havoc that is going to result from this product. It will be like the Tickle-Me-Elmo craze of 1996 only worse, because instead of crazy moms trying to please their kids, this time it?s going to be crazy girls trying to please themselves. After years of probing their guys for some feelings, women can just spray this stuff and suddenly find the poetic, romantic dream boat hidden inside? I can?t even imagine how many women are going to start buying this for their mate, but I know they do, they need to be prepared in full protective gear. And they should probably leave the earrings at home.
Some call the new cuddle spray the ?relationship Viagra,? which sounds simply delightful. But I have to wonder if guys need to consult a doctor if they feel emotional for more than 4 hours, how emotional do we want our men to be? Sure, empathy is nice, but isn?t part of the appeal of men that they aren?t as emotional as women? Do I really want my boyfriend to cry when I tell him that he can?t wear mid-calf socks with shorts? Do I really want to come home and find him sitting on the couch, sobbing into a tub of Edy?s as another bride finds ?the dress? on Say Yes to The Dress? I think not. It?s that mystery and aloofness that gets us interested in the relationship to begin with, isn?t it?
I suspect that once this new spray hits mainstream, the appeal of quiet, mysterious men will grow. After all, don?t we all laugh when we read Edward Cullen?s moanings? Was I the only one who was completely freaked out that he stood over Bella?s bed at night, watching her? If that?s what this Cuddle Spray is going to do to my man, then I?m gonna have to say, no thank you. I?ll stick to the cologne-wearing, non-stalking, non-comparing-me-to-heroine boys. I like them a little rough around the edges. And smelling good.
May 11, 2010
A constant complaint we girls have is that men ?don?t talk,? that they ?never tell us how they really feel,? and anyone who?s ever interacted with a dude knows its pretty unusual to see one cry. And sometimes that gets frustrating and we just want our guy to share his emotions. We don?t want to date a robot; we want a guy with feelings. We know they?re in there somewhere and we just need a little somethin? somethin? to bring ?em out.
Well, now there is that something. And it?s not a viewing of Field of Dreams. Scientists have been working furiously and finally come up with a solution to this very real problem:
Introducing Cuddle Spray a hormone-laced nasal spray developed by Universities of Oxford and Bonn.
I won?t bore you by telling you how it uses neuropeptide oxycotin, and how half of the forty-eight men they tested it on expressed their feelings more. And I won?t touch the subject of how the male participants had increased emotional empathy, either. You can read more about that later.
What I will talk about, however, is the commercial havoc that is going to result from this product. It will be like the Tickle-Me-Elmo craze of 1996 only worse, because instead of crazy moms trying to please their kids, this time it?s going to be crazy girls trying to please themselves. After years of probing their guys for some feelings, women can just spray this stuff and suddenly find the poetic, romantic dream boat hidden inside? I can?t even imagine how many women are going to start buying this for their mate, but I know they do, they need to be prepared in full protective gear. And they should probably leave the earrings at home.
Some call the new cuddle spray the ?relationship Viagra,? which sounds simply delightful. But I have to wonder if guys need to consult a doctor if they feel emotional for more than 4 hours, how emotional do we want our men to be? Sure, empathy is nice, but isn?t part of the appeal of men that they aren?t as emotional as women? Do I really want my boyfriend to cry when I tell him that he can?t wear mid-calf socks with shorts? Do I really want to come home and find him sitting on the couch, sobbing into a tub of Edy?s as another bride finds ?the dress? on Say Yes to The Dress? I think not. It?s that mystery and aloofness that gets us interested in the relationship to begin with, isn?t it?
I suspect that once this new spray hits mainstream, the appeal of quiet, mysterious men will grow. After all, don?t we all laugh when we read Edward Cullen?s moanings? Was I the only one who was completely freaked out that he stood over Bella?s bed at night, watching her? If that?s what this Cuddle Spray is going to do to my man, then I?m gonna have to say, no thank you. I?ll stick to the cologne-wearing, non-stalking, non-comparing-me-to-heroine boys. I like them a little rough around the edges. And smelling good.
