Drunk Driver MVA - has caused my mental health to hit a all time low

[Hunter]

I am not in a very good place right now...or have been since Sept. when I was hit by a drunk driver - he caused a four car pileup - I was hit from behind and then I hit the car in front of me, the drunk was going approx. 50 miles per hours, and he was over the legal limit by twice the normal amount. Not only have I not been able to return to work full time, but I am being poked and probbed by every imaginale health care worker in the hopes of my getting back some mobility and normalcy.

Dont get me wtong, I am happy that I am getting physiotherapy, massage therapy, accupunture, exercise therapy, but I am also seeing a pain management counsellor who are all making my life bearable. I am just so sick and tired of being in pain...the physical pain from the accident has made my emotional pain skyrocket. I am having to take narcotic pain meds, several of them in order to get some relief from the pain. I have tried to go back to work even just two hours per day but have had to leave work because of the severe pain.

This angers me so much. I have worked hard to get where I am at this job and not knowing if I can return to it leaves me full of rage....so much rage....I have thought of taking all my pain meds and saying f**** this all...My pain management specialist sensed me at my ultimate low, and he asked me how long have I been thinking of suicide....and I said just the last month..

He made me promise not to do anything unless I first called him...he has been my rock this past several months...he has gone out of his way to help me. He has given me his cell phone number and said to call him 24-7 if I am wanting to end it all. I decided that I love my life more...than to do something that would end it all. It just took his caring, and his guidance and his therapeutic nature.....I have never worked with someone like him...so I am fortunate to have him in my life.

This is the reason that I have not been posting or have been on the website lately. I just had basically given up, but now this has changed. All due to my counsellor, who has made a huge difference in me and in my life...

thanks to all the persons who have emailed me, asking how have I been, it has been a hard road, but I am going to plug at it. My ultimate goal is to get back to work full time....

Hunter

 

[forgetmenot]

Glad you found that councilor hun someone you can trust and that gives you the support you need to keep fighting hugs

 

[Cat Dancer]

Glad you have your counselor. I'm really sorry you've been going through so much.

 

[Hunter]

I am not happy to say but last night I took several more narcotic pain meds, just to get over the five year anniversary of my fathers death. I just wanted to get through the day without being in so much pain, both physical and mental. I am seeing my counsellor tonight and will be talking to him about it. I let myself down by doing this

 

[MHealthJo]

So sorry for so much stuff you have been going through.

You're on a very difficult road, so please remember that each day is a new day, and we can only talk through the times when we feel we didn't have the strength for a certain challenge. Then we've done the right thing to continue building our strength.

Wishing the best to you, keep on using all the supports you can get your hands on, and really happy for you having the counsellor you trust. xx