Good to be here

[luaprelkniw]

Hi Everyone, glad I found you guys. My name is Paul and I have bipolar disorder. I have had many med changes over the past year, due to the stress in my daughter's family. Her husband has severe depression issues, and is unable to access any resources to help. After a year has now passed, my daughter and their two kids are also depressed and have major behavioural problems. I don't see my symptoms improving for the foreseeable future, unfortunately.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Welcome, Paul.

Why is it your daughter’s family can’t access resources?

 

[forgetmenot]

Hi Paul nice to meet you. Can the school social workers not help the children and your daughter can she not get some support as well from a therapist or her own doctor. Her husband has depression and it can be so difficult you right is your son inlaw getting any treatments with meds or therapy.

 

[luaprelkniw]

Welcome, Paul.

Why is it your daughter’s family can’t access resources?

That's a great question, David. I think it has to do with the shortage of both psychiatrists and GP's here. My son-in-law's GP is near retirement and has little experience with psychiatric cases, so only prescribes a medication if it's suggested by my daughter (her husband is in no shape to think that clearly.) The wait for a new GP is over a year. The wait for a psychiatrist is closer to 2 years; it's not clear to me whether a referral has even been done yet. The self-help groups here are mainly monopolised by a regular crew who talk about their own challenges; they're welcoming enough but don't really invite others to share. I am personally very fortunate to have had a good team of doctors for over 20 years, although even I can't get psychotherapy. The situation has declined so much since the 90's!

- - - Updated - - -

Thank you for your suggestions, forgetmenot! My grandson holds it together very well at kindergarten; he's an extremely private person, so mainly lets loose on his parents afterward - the tantrums are totally amazing, and can last for hours. Granddaughter is only 2 years old and she's a real handful (I know because we babysit several times a week!) Yes my son-in-law is on meds: mainly the ones I've suggested from my own experience. Sadly, my daughter's GP is too busy to see her; she asked a couple of days ago and was refused; she can only see one of the nurse practitioners, who don't really know her personally and aren't much help. The receptionist is one of the most unpleasant individuals I've ever met, who makes it impossible to get help without actually going to the clinic to make an appointment; not easy for a working Mom with a very sick husband. The doctor herself is also a zoo/wildlife veterinarian, so she doesn't really have enough time for everyone.

 

[forgetmenot]

My hope is that perhaps the mother then can bring up her concerns to the school where the children go to so they may get support in place for them to express what is happening inside. In doing this they will not have to wait until their emotions come to an explosive height and that they can release it slowly with a social worker at the school. Is there a hospital where they live where the husband could go see an on call psychiatrist just to get a proper assessment and meds ordered for him. I am sorry it is so difficult for people to get help when they need it.

 

[luaprelkniw]

Thanks again, forgetmenot. You can imagine how frustrating this all is: my daughter has brought up the behavioural issues at school a couple of times, but as they don't have any trouble with him there, they have more serious cases to handle. Luckily, after an emergency room visit with a GP, my son-in-law was enrolled in some CBT classes and had temporary access to a psychiatrist, but they were only able to see him twice, after which his eligibility ended. The CBT has helped somewhat. His pharmacist is the only professional who's been consistently helpful, but he is very limited in what he can do. We're at our wits' end, as one might expect!

 

[GaryQ]

Hi and welcome to the forum. We all understand and know too well how difficult it is becoming Iin Canada to get proper physiatric help. It’s not only sad it’s becoming pathetic. The public message is about mental heath awareness but it’s not the reality for most people.

One thing I’ve learned personally is that a Doctor will usually listen up a pharmacist when he calls the doc with suggestions or concerns. So if he has a good pharmacist that knows him well and his problems he might be a great temporary aid in suggesting if a certain medication might be helpful or not. Mine is the best guy on my medical team. Even has me text him with updates like last week when I had my colonoscopy.

There’s a humongous amount of material on the forum it might seem intimidating at first but don’t let it overwhelm you we have at least 2 guys David and Daniel that can find anything in a pretty impressive timeframe here or elsewhere if you need help.

There’s a different philosophy here contrary to most forums: no one will ever say search the forum there’s a lot of answers to your questions. If you’re in a situation where help is needed fast just post and ask. That’s what we’re here for! Same goes just just venting or sharing your feelings.
Gary

 

[forgetmenot]

It is good your daughter has brought up her concerns and hopefully the school will continue to monitor the children's emotional well being and if they see changes within the school the will step in and get them the support they need. If it is not already done get son inlaw name on the list for the new GP and Psychiatrist. For now all you can do then is to keep taking him to the emergency psychiatrist who will again hopefully get him support when released. It is so very hard to get help i hear you but if he is brought into emergency they need to set up support for him when discharged If he is critical he should be put to top of the list for doctors.

 

[luaprelkniw]

You folks are awesome, replying so fast and thoughtfully, with great suggestions as well. Thanks Gary for the pointers regarding the forum topics; I'll try to do some reading-up.

In the UK, mental health lobbies are fighting for parity of government funding between physical and mental health services. I do think this would relieve some of the pressure on patients here as well.

 

[GaryQ]

“Talking about something” is a political correct term for “pretend to give a hoot and pass the buck to the next ones in power.” Talk is cheap and makes someone look good. Sadly, Doesn’t do much for those in need.

Thanks, we are a great bunch... :lol:
just make sure you don’t post something that one or all of us can run away with cause some posts can go off topic with an extreme speed and humor that’ll make these replies seem slow. As for me I got a date across the hall so don’t count on me tonight for any more quick replies

BTW save yourself a ton of keystrokes we kindly refer to forgetmenot as simply FMN. I doubt that she has a minimum post ratio for that privilege

 

[BlackCat22]

Paul, I'm from ONtario as well. I don't know where you are from exactly, but have you heard of COAST (Crisis Outreach and Support Team)? Not sure if they are local to Hamilton only or a provincial body, but it might help to call them up and ask them about other outreach programs if you are not in the area. They give immediate help in bad situations over the phone but will also assess the kids and get them and the parents more help. Their website is: COAST Hamilton, 24 hr help line is 905-972-8338. This number is also for adults in crisis.