Hi, I'm new

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Black Cat

Black Cat

Member
Hello, I'm new here, and I wanted to say a little about myself and why i chose to join psychlinks.

I'm a college student currently working on a major in psychology and a minor in acting, I love the outdoors and animals, and I'm very fond of video games and monster movies.

I found this site while looking for resources to help me deal with some issues I have regarding sex and past experiences. I'm in a wonderful and loving relationship with my boyfriend who was also my first, but I'm having some difficulties. My father was inappropriate when I was a child (still is, and is also an alcoholic, something that got worse in recent years) telling sexual jokes, teasing me, slapping my butt when I told him stop, and refusing to accept I wouldn't want to hug him or lay with him on the couch when I was going through puberty.

The current major problem from all this is I have nightmares about him that cause me lots of stress during the day and when I try to be intimate with my boyfriend. It's gotten bad enough I can't take a shower without feeling dirty or having flashbacks of nightmares.

I was hoping I might find other people who would be able to help me understand why I feel the way I do and share ways to deal with my nightmares. From what I've seen this is a very positive community and someplace I would like to begin healing.

-BC :purr:
 
T

Trust

Member
Hi Black Cat!:D

Welcome!

I enjoyed reading your bio and I applaud your efforts to seek self-understanding and support for your particular issues. I'm sure you will find this forum helpful, both personally and academically, and I am happy you chose to join us here! :2thumbs:
 
IVO

IVO

Member
Hello, Black Cat.

Welcome to Psychlinks.

Your problem sounds familiar to me. I myself did not have such problem, but I know to some extent what it is. The root of the problem might be that fact that your father is an alcoholic. People in this state do things they would never do if they were not addicted to alcohol. I think your dad would never want to harm you in this way or to make you feel like this, but he did not have control on himself because of his state.

You may try to think this way - he is your dad and he would like you to have a normal relationship with your boyfriend. As for the things he had done/ is doing - you cannot blame him, as I said, I don't think he really means them. :unsure:
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Black Cat

Black Cat

Member
David Baxter said:
Welcome, Black Cat.

Have you ever talked about any of these things with a counselor or therapist?
Click to expand...


I've tried, but unfortunately these last few years I've only had access to the school counselors, and they've been ignoring what I say to try and get me to someone off campus (which wasn't working because I didn't have insurance that would cover me where my school is). I've got a secondary plan now, though, but finding someone accessible to a car-less college student is proving a challenge.
 
R

Retired

Member
Welcome to Psychlinks Black Cat. Hope you find the support you need here.

Does your College provide Student Health Services where physicians provide medical and mental health care?
 
Black Cat

Black Cat

Member
TSOW said:
Welcome to Psychlinks Black Cat. Hope you find the support you need here.

Does your College provide Student Health Services where physicians provide medical and mental health care?
Click to expand...
Yeah, but since I'm going to be a senior they don't want me there anymore. They ceased service to me at the end of my sophomore year and told me I had to go someplace else because other people need help too. Finding someone accessible in the area has been terrible though.
 
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