[Trigger] Intrusive thoughts and impulsive urges

[NicNak]

The past few days I have been waking up aggitated with intrusive thoughts and urges of self harming again.

I have not done so in over a year. In my intrusive thoughts it flashes in my eyes quite graphically. This in itself is scary to me. Although I have not acted on it and I don't believe I will.

The silver lining of it is that I have never harmed at home. It was always at work and I always had a specific tool I used, which I do not ever keep in my home.

I did attempt to raise my meds last week, but it was difficult again.

The day after taking my upped dosage I was so aggitated too and even after trying to take it ever other day, it wasn't working. I called my doctor cause it was more distressing than sleeping all the time (which I can handle for now) So I went back to my usual dosage until I see him again.

If anyone can offer some ideas with coping with this, until I see my Psychiatrist again. Thank you everyone for all your support always.

 

[ladylore]

There is a Buddhist way of thinking that:
We are our body, but we are not our body
We are our mind, but we are not our mind
We are our feelings, but we are not our feelings

In other words your thoughts are just that - thoughts. They aren't you NicNac, no matter how disturbing they are.

What can you do to change your focus when this starts to happen. Maybe counting everything in your surroundings that is blue, green, purple.... just to change the focus.

I think of it as a dream, and I have some wierd ones. But doesn't matter how wierd they are, they are only dreams so I don't put much salt into them.

Hope this helps a bit NN.

 

[Daniel E.]

Similarly:

In a nutshell, mindfulness techniques encourage you to simply take note of distressing thoughts, rather than trying to push them away or control them...“control is the problem – not the solution"

Getting Your ACT Together - Psychlinks Psychology Self-Help & Mental Health Support Forum

One thing patients learn very early, for instance, is to notice when their emotions begin to stir, allow themselves to feel the storm whip up, then let it pass -- all without doing anything. This Zen-like self-observation, called mindfulness, is an exercise not in avoidance but in feeling and enduring emotional pain. It dramatizes one principle of the therapy: that what patients do can be independent of how they feel. Emotion does not have to rule behavior.

Dialectical Behavior Therapy: With Toughness and Caring - Psychlinks

More info on DBT/mindfulness techniques here:

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy - Psychlinks
From Suffering to Freedom: Practicing Reality Acceptance
http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/html/dbt_video_text.html

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Two other options:

1. thought stopping - shout the word "STOP!" loudly in your head or even out loud if you're alone as a way of breaking the cycle of these thoughts bouncing around in your head, or if you're more of a visual person try to visualize a giant bright red STOP sign and focus on that, basically not allowing the thoughts to take control; or

2. accept and identify the thoughts for what they are: anxiety or stress - along the lines of the Brain Lock book (see threads in Resources and OCD forums) - instead of fighting the thought or giving it any special significance or power, just recognize it and identify it - "oh okay there it is again - one of my OCD-type anxiety thoughts" - then let it pass through you without feeling that you have to pay any special attention to it or do anything about it.

 

[gooblax]

What I've found with impulsive urges is that the urge subsides once you get through the moment - I don't know if that would be true for you, but simply remembering that can often help me.

Do you have a list of 'distractions' that you can go through?
eg. watch a video, listen to some music, do 50 starjumps....
And if the urge remains after completing the list, go through the list again.

Alternatively you could write a list of the reasons you don't want to give in to the urge.

Take care NN

 

[Halo]

NN,

A lot of times when I have intrusive thoughts that just won't seem to go away I use the thought stopping that David suggested above. My thoughts happen mostly at work and that is when I need to stop them most because I have to focus on work so I don't yell out loud (then they would really wonder about me ) but I do yell STOP in my head a number of times until the thought seems to go away and I can get refocused.

So basically this was just a long way of saying the STOP process works

Take care

 

[amastie]

Hi NN

my experience of other people inside me (most of whom bring me thoughts to self-sabotage rather than directly self-harm, though hitting myself has occurred and the demand to overeat, or to put myself in the way of being thought badly of by others. Nothing so harmful as what your thougts bring however.

By all means try those methods given by David and others and,if they work, don't go further. I add the following methods which work with success at different times - depending upon which thought/"personality" is close at the time.

1. Play music that helps to over-ride the thoughts and change the direction of your feeling. Play whichever music you recognize can do that.

2, Sing or dance to some music with a good beat. Lose yourself (and your thoughts) to the rhythm. It's hard to have one type of thought and another at the same time.

2. This one is helpful if you find visualizing easy: imagine the thought which wants to harm you trying to but *not* succeeding, Create in your mind a situation in which, for example, the implement you would use is stuck in quicksand and you can't pull it out. It keeps slipping away. Or it's covered in fat and is too slippery to pick up. The helpfulness of this imagery is that it can create in you a frustration that pre-empts the attempt. It helps to build a feeling of "What is even the point?"

3. Do you recognize why these thoughts are occurring right now? Has someting happened? If at all possible, tackle that issue head on because it will give you power, and get help to do that if you need.

6. *Don't* put yourself where you can lay your hands on the implement that use. if you must go to work, ask that someone else work in that area where that implement is to be found and create a reason (for your boss) to have to work elsewhere if that is possible in any way. Don't be afraid to ask.

4. Above all, ring your therapist! Let him/her know that these thoughts are happening then he/she is in a position to advise you on any changes to your meds.

And get back to us. If my words make it harder, not easier, for you to let go of the impulse - we all need to tackle such thoughts in our own way - by all means trust those suggestions given by others. They are, I know, long-established methods for stopping thoughts. I add mine just in case they *might* be helpful

 

[NicNak]

3. Do you recognize why these thoughts are occurring right now? Has someting happened? If at all possible, tackle that issue head on because it will give you power, and get help to do that if you need.

I am not sure where they came from. I did have a bit stressful of a weekend than usual, maybe that did it?

6. *Don't* put yourself where you can lay your hands on the implement that use. if you must go to work, ask that someone else work in that area where that implement is to be found and create a reason (for your boss) to have to work elsewhere if that is possible in any way. Don't be afraid to ask.

I am currently on sick leave from work and applying for disability now, so luckily I am not in the environment where I can get the "tool" I used.

Unfortunetly there were times before I left work where I actually called in sick with these ideas running through my head. This device is readily available to all staff.

4. Above all, ring your therapist! Let him/her know that these thoughts are happening then he/she is in a position to advise you on any changes to your meds.

This is great advice. I have been in contact with my Psychiatrist last week and this week. I have let him be aware.

And get back to us. If my words make it harder, not easier, for you to let go of the impulse - we all need to tackle such thoughts in our own way - by all means trust those suggestions given by others. They are, I know, long-established methods for stopping thoughts. I add mine just in case they *might* be helpful

Well I have good news, this morning, no racing thoughts or the impulsive urges. Thankfully.

Thanks Amastie :hug: and all the others who replied. Your kindness, support, understanding and advice are always so helpful.

 

[amastie]

NN,

... I have to focus on work so I don't yell out loud (then they would really wonder about me ) ...

Halo, yours yell out aloud too!

I"ve felt alone particularly recently about this. Must start another thread on the subject but too tired tnight.


amastie added 12 Minutes and 14 Seconds later...


Not alone right now however!
Too busy rejoicing in NN's wonderful victory!