Atlantean
Member
Greetings, all.
My name is Starr, and I lucked into this forum by meeting another member of the forum in another forum.
My passions in life (family aside, of course) are horses, Photography, computers, hurricanes and violent weather disturbances. Weather and the planet (and the Universe, and other Universes with their own planets that we will never in my lifetime even be able to explore), just fascinate me.
I am pretty much a total recluse, and My husband and my 8 month old son complete my home.
Psychologically I suffer from severe anxiety (general and social, with agoraphobic traits), ADHD, PTSD, DPD, DID. I used to be a horrifically bad self-injurer, and the one time I went to the hospital I had to get {extensive medical treatment} for {three incisions in various parts of my body}. I never went back to a hospital again as my experience there was so bad, but all that was back in 2000-2002, with only a minor relapse, and nothing at all "serious".
My biggest problem is just my head races and goes non stop, and it doesnt matter how active I am, or how long Ive been up, I just cant silence my thoughts. I have gone through everything they can think of (Seraquel 800mg, Effexor, trazedone (currently 300/day), mellaril, ritalin 50mg, zyprexa 10 mg, lithium 1500mg, Ativan 4mg, clonopin (curently 6mg/day) and Thorazine, down to 300/day from 500). The clonopin and thorazine are for my hopeless insomnia, and Ill take one during the day if I just absolutely feel like Im climbing the walls, but really nothing else has helped.
I have spent the last year and a half going through "therapy" at a local outreach center and have been pretty disgusted, to say the least. They are just incompetent and when I have voiced my feelings and asked for more aggressive therapy, I have been told they didnt think I was stable enough for more aggressive therapy, which is total hogwash. I was also never once seen by a doctor, just cared for by a counselor and nurse practitioner who managed my meds.
I have recently found a doctor who was trained in france and who so far I have clicked with over the phone, but he is out of my insurance network so seeing him will add to a financial burden that we didnt need, with my husband and I both on fixed incomes.
I am trying to b\put all my computer interests and hypomanic energy to use to start my own business, but feel extremely frustrated by that too, because Im a perfectionist and I can never get my web site just "right"
So, probably more than anyone wanted to know, but here I am, and I look forward to meeting everybody and seeing what helpful resources may be here.
-Starr
:jiggy:
My name is Starr, and I lucked into this forum by meeting another member of the forum in another forum.
My passions in life (family aside, of course) are horses, Photography, computers, hurricanes and violent weather disturbances. Weather and the planet (and the Universe, and other Universes with their own planets that we will never in my lifetime even be able to explore), just fascinate me.
I am pretty much a total recluse, and My husband and my 8 month old son complete my home.
Psychologically I suffer from severe anxiety (general and social, with agoraphobic traits), ADHD, PTSD, DPD, DID. I used to be a horrifically bad self-injurer, and the one time I went to the hospital I had to get {extensive medical treatment} for {three incisions in various parts of my body}. I never went back to a hospital again as my experience there was so bad, but all that was back in 2000-2002, with only a minor relapse, and nothing at all "serious".
My biggest problem is just my head races and goes non stop, and it doesnt matter how active I am, or how long Ive been up, I just cant silence my thoughts. I have gone through everything they can think of (Seraquel 800mg, Effexor, trazedone (currently 300/day), mellaril, ritalin 50mg, zyprexa 10 mg, lithium 1500mg, Ativan 4mg, clonopin (curently 6mg/day) and Thorazine, down to 300/day from 500). The clonopin and thorazine are for my hopeless insomnia, and Ill take one during the day if I just absolutely feel like Im climbing the walls, but really nothing else has helped.
I have spent the last year and a half going through "therapy" at a local outreach center and have been pretty disgusted, to say the least. They are just incompetent and when I have voiced my feelings and asked for more aggressive therapy, I have been told they didnt think I was stable enough for more aggressive therapy, which is total hogwash. I was also never once seen by a doctor, just cared for by a counselor and nurse practitioner who managed my meds.
I have recently found a doctor who was trained in france and who so far I have clicked with over the phone, but he is out of my insurance network so seeing him will add to a financial burden that we didnt need, with my husband and I both on fixed incomes.
I am trying to b\put all my computer interests and hypomanic energy to use to start my own business, but feel extremely frustrated by that too, because Im a perfectionist and I can never get my web site just "right"
So, probably more than anyone wanted to know, but here I am, and I look forward to meeting everybody and seeing what helpful resources may be here.
-Starr
:jiggy:
Last edited by a moderator:
