Hello,
I am very glad to have found this site. I am 32 year old female, single, no kids. I am a skin picker, wound interference, and hair puller. I started hair pulling (eyelashes) in first grade and it slowly developed into scalp scab picking. I also have Social Anxiety Disorder and I am sure other problems as well, just havent figured them out yet. It is so good to know I am not the only one and there is support.
I knew about SAD, as a condition. It is very hard to make people understand it is NOT just being shy. My friends who say "Oh, everybody gets flustered when they have to give a speach." Have absolutly no idea what SAD is really like. I dont think their minds can even comprehend the complete panic attack that comes with SAD. I also have very low self eseteem. I have good friends, and can fake my way thrugh meeting new people (one person, but not large groups), but when meeting new people I am often disconneted, saying things that I am supposed to say without realy being "there"? Does that make any sesne?
I can train new people at work, but again I am disconnected. I can regurgitate the machine instructions, but if they ask me about ME I panic. I rarely look people in the eye, I never initiate the conversation (people think I am stuck up...but that couldnt be farther than the truth.) I do fine in public as long as no body pays attention to me, but if I somehow become noticed and everyone looks at me I freak and that is what causes me to get even more self consious throwing me in to a full blown panic attack. I can walk around large groups of people for days and not speak to any of them. I can "speak" on the computer just fine, although my typing is terrible, but I can not properly speak face to face except people I know well. I even get "funny" around my extended family members durring big family get togethers, and although I only see them a couple times a year I have known these people my whole life.
Self Injury is what lead me to this site. I am primarly a scab picker but also pluck hairs and wound interference. I am only now finding out the picking is actualy a form of SI and is not normal...and finding out that there are other people who do it too.
[Deleted triggering paragraph]
I am also borderline hoarder. I have a hard time fighting this but I do sucessfully fight it. I am a slob (probably goes along with hoarding, low self esteem, maybe even a defence mechinism?) I am caffine addicted, actual withdraws if I dont get it. I drink a 2 liter of pop a day, which is killing my stomach, ruining my teeth and probably not doing my mental state any good. I am pretty sure I am narcolepctic (always falling asleep), my brother is medicaly diagnosed, but I havent been tested. I also have some insomnia (cant sleep). yes it is possible to have both narcolepsy and insomnia. I have anxiety and some depression.
I work with animals, and I deal with animals much better than humans. I can handle a dominance chalenge from a wolf that could very well kill me, but I am too scared to walk up to a person on the street and just say "Hi." I see all the bad things people do to each other and many days would like to run away with the wolf pack. I want to meet Mr. Right (yes, a HUMAN Mr. Right) but dont have much desire for any other human contact other than my friends and family.
Well enough for now. I am going to explore this site. I would love to hear from some pickers and anyone else with any of my other problems.
See ya.
Wolf Eyes
I am very glad to have found this site. I am 32 year old female, single, no kids. I am a skin picker, wound interference, and hair puller. I started hair pulling (eyelashes) in first grade and it slowly developed into scalp scab picking. I also have Social Anxiety Disorder and I am sure other problems as well, just havent figured them out yet. It is so good to know I am not the only one and there is support.
I knew about SAD, as a condition. It is very hard to make people understand it is NOT just being shy. My friends who say "Oh, everybody gets flustered when they have to give a speach." Have absolutly no idea what SAD is really like. I dont think their minds can even comprehend the complete panic attack that comes with SAD. I also have very low self eseteem. I have good friends, and can fake my way thrugh meeting new people (one person, but not large groups), but when meeting new people I am often disconneted, saying things that I am supposed to say without realy being "there"? Does that make any sesne?
I can train new people at work, but again I am disconnected. I can regurgitate the machine instructions, but if they ask me about ME I panic. I rarely look people in the eye, I never initiate the conversation (people think I am stuck up...but that couldnt be farther than the truth.) I do fine in public as long as no body pays attention to me, but if I somehow become noticed and everyone looks at me I freak and that is what causes me to get even more self consious throwing me in to a full blown panic attack. I can walk around large groups of people for days and not speak to any of them. I can "speak" on the computer just fine, although my typing is terrible, but I can not properly speak face to face except people I know well. I even get "funny" around my extended family members durring big family get togethers, and although I only see them a couple times a year I have known these people my whole life.
Self Injury is what lead me to this site. I am primarly a scab picker but also pluck hairs and wound interference. I am only now finding out the picking is actualy a form of SI and is not normal...and finding out that there are other people who do it too.
[Deleted triggering paragraph]
I am also borderline hoarder. I have a hard time fighting this but I do sucessfully fight it. I am a slob (probably goes along with hoarding, low self esteem, maybe even a defence mechinism?) I am caffine addicted, actual withdraws if I dont get it. I drink a 2 liter of pop a day, which is killing my stomach, ruining my teeth and probably not doing my mental state any good. I am pretty sure I am narcolepctic (always falling asleep), my brother is medicaly diagnosed, but I havent been tested. I also have some insomnia (cant sleep). yes it is possible to have both narcolepsy and insomnia. I have anxiety and some depression.
I work with animals, and I deal with animals much better than humans. I can handle a dominance chalenge from a wolf that could very well kill me, but I am too scared to walk up to a person on the street and just say "Hi." I see all the bad things people do to each other and many days would like to run away with the wolf pack. I want to meet Mr. Right (yes, a HUMAN Mr. Right) but dont have much desire for any other human contact other than my friends and family.
Well enough for now. I am going to explore this site. I would love to hear from some pickers and anyone else with any of my other problems.
See ya.
Wolf Eyes
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