What is recovery?

[Ashley-Kate]

How do you know when you are relapsing, when you are slipping back into the eating disorder?

I have been having a hard time in the last weeks. I am back to looking at nutritionnal labels and debating on what I can eat or not; then I count how much exercise I would have to do for a certain amount of calories. The list of forbiden foods has gotten larger again. I just moved out and now live with my boyfriend who knows about the eating disorder and how bad it can get so that helps me, yet I know I am slipping and I can't grab on to anything. I would like to eat yet freak out about the prospect of eating.

Will I ever get past the need to calculate everything, the need to compensate somehow.. will it ever change?

 

[Yuray]

Re: whats recovery

Reading labels for nutritional info and calculating food intake vs. calorie burning exercise is not specific to someone with an eating disorder. Most prudent shoppers spend more time reading labels now than ever before. I don't think that is a sign of slipping, but if this isn't just a random line of thinking, and it precurses a relapse at times, it is a sign to talk to your therapist or practise thought exercises that have helped you in the past.

Maybe just a bad day, or week?, or stress related to moving in with your boyfriend?

http://forum.psychlinks.ca/eating-disorders/19080-eating-disorder-treatment-know-your-options.html

 

[Ashley-Kate]

Re: whats recovery

yeah maybe i hope so i think today i probably simply over did it, spent most of my day byke riding around the city and jogging everywere it's probably the stress.

 

[GDPR]

Re: whats recovery

how do you know when you are relapsing when you are slipping back into the eating disorder?

I'm sure it's different for everyone, but for me,sometimes I don't realize I'm relapsing until I start feeling unwell and I'm already in the midst of it.

But since I have struggled with this for so many years, I'm usually able to recognize when my thinking is distorted and irrational and prevent a full blown relapse. I know that when things are stressful and chaotic, I have to pay close attention to my thoughts, or else they will take over. I know that when I start thinking that I'm overweight, that I just need to lose 5 or 10 pounds, I'm headed for trouble.

What works for me, usually, is to weigh myself. I see the numbers and then tell myself that I'm NOT fat, I can't possibly be if that's all I weigh, and remind myself that my mind is just playing tricks on me, and that what I'm thinking and what I'm seeing in the mirror isn't real. Sometimes it's hard to convince myself, but if I keep at it, it almost always works.

If I'm already in the midst of it, and didn't recognize it right away, and I'm already feeling unwell, I'm able to force feed myself and wash food down with water until I'm back to a healthy weight.

It has taken a long time to recognize the patterns that cause a slip. And I'm sure I will struggle my whole life, but it has got much easier.

Either way, I'm finally to a point where I can control it pretty well without outside intervention.

This probably didn't help you at all though.....

 

[Ashley-Kate]

thanks to all of you,
I went to a group for e-d's yesterday and the woman that does the group suggested i go to the english groups as well simply to be in 2 groups a week. She noticed i am slipping back into the isolation of the eating disorder and that my physical state is also getting hit. I have been inthe group for about 3 weeks now and I trully feel like this week i went from having simple thoughts of restriction to restricting completly and falling back into the anorexia. My boyfriend is worried and so if my family, the group counselor also expressed worry. I am not even sad that i lost control again and fell back i am more sad because i feel that i dissapointed my friends and family, they are the ones that continue to believe yet i feel i won't make it through this disorder after a couple of years on this site I always felt liike i would probably not make it but i kept getting back on yet in the last year i lost what little hope i had left, I thank you all for believing in me i trully do but i am so very tired of this disorder and fighting against it all the time when it seems to have tooken me kidnapped my mind and i feel so exhausted.