What is the deal with punishment?

[MDH]

I can't seem to get this off my chest as of recently - the fact that in every little possible way, humans are obsessed with punishing people.

Even many psychologists still believe in ideas which, even if they're not "the old fashione kind", still involve some form of punishment.

They apply all sorts of conditions to people and the world around them in order to make it work.

There's got to be a least fourty million layers of excuses, backups and ideas that people just apply to things in order to create an ideal environment for hurting another person - in a so called "justified" fashion, that can't be challanged from an ethical or philosophical standpoint.

Why would people do something like this?

Especially those people who know it's wrong, then damn well keep doing it and keep excusing themselves in every way.

So many people believe in an idea that is utterly hypocritical, pointless and only ends up screwing up the mindset of the general population in the end.

In my opinion it's one of the biggest impediments to us becoming a more humane society because from my knowledge just about all punishment idealizes and creates the denial of another person's emotions, knowledge or stance.

Tell me how many people you meet every day who think that a murder in jail is learning something by being punished?

It's that kind of absolutely inhumane, idiotic naivity that just drives me insane. I'm aware it's ironic of me to say that -- but so be it. That is exactly how I feel about the situation at hand.

It drives me crazy that the average voting, active individual is thinking this way. And that governments hand them power to do this to young children in the most inhumane fashion - that god damned sickens me.

Is the average person really too stupid to perk up and realize that punishment does nothing?

That's really what I'd like to know. Perhaps there's still some population I can relate to.

-MDH

P.S.

Damn, I just love it when some guy who punishes his kid for swearing swears seven times a day. Did your daddy ever manage to make you stop?

It seems pretty damn obvious that he didn't.

So, tell me why you punish your son for it?

 

[ladylore]

Hi MDH

I agree, I believe everyone should be treated fairly and natural consequences are just that, natural consequences - not punishment.

You may want to check out some of the articles on the site, lots of great information and there is a section on anger, parenting and others that may have insights on what you are talking about.

Welcome to the forum :wave4:

Ladylore

 

[Halo]

Welcome to Psychlinks MDH :welcome2: and Ladylore is right in that there are a lot of great articles on here that you may want to check out. I hope you find them helpful

 

[MDH]

Well, here's the deal. I don't live in the most liberal parts of Canada. One place I am in is in a rural part of Stratford Ontario and that's right now. I don't mean to get political here -- but I think that generally speaking - that perticular group tends to be more into the idea of punishment.

At home, I live in Nanaimo, BC, which I know sounds average of any person -- but is one of the worst places I've ever been to and ever will be to.

Either way, I can't walk down the street without seeing some parents bullying their kids (This is average of the north american population, no?) or people getting into arguments which have absolutely NO substance whatsoever (Yes I'm aware not everyone is sitting on top of piles of precious logic) over the dumbest little things.

Even people close to me are like this.

I don't have a damn way to deal with this because even my relatives are like this to their kids especially - Nothing my one "aunt" says improves anything. Her kid walks up with a creative report she wants to show her mom and she started pointing out things in the most adgitated, infuriated voice like spelling "toenails" wrong and rhetorically asking "HOW DO YOU SPELL TOE?".

I mean, hell, what do people get out of this?

Is their honestly any point to it and who am I as a mere teenager to approach these people and tell them they're full of ****?

how am I supposed to deal with these sort of people?

I have been studying psychology for the last two and a half years and I can't honestly stand people treating their kids that way.

I just want to rant at some of these people, but I still know it's pointless, they're an illogical (thus practically undefeatable) self proclaimed athourity, they mindlessly believe in themselves, or just don't at all and can't let their guard down, effectively bringing all the innocent people who don't really deserve it down with them.

For the record, I have read many of such articles as the ancient Boris Sidis workings, psychodynamics of the punisher, and have been thinking of ways to approach these people.

I'm just trying to resist taking the first thing I can in front of me and going bezerk on one of these people someday.

Trust me. On that very, if I could without having the ***** spread stories about how "bad I am" and how I should "mind my own business" (shrill annoyed accusive voice included) I'd just love to.

 

[Halo]

I tend to agree with some of what you said but one thing that we all have to remember is that we cannot change other people nor can we change their reactions and actions. The only people that we can be responsible for is ourselves. I can sense your anger in your post and I have to say I am concerned at the level and the degree. If you are unable to calmly speak to say your aunt about how she treats people then there really is nothing you can do. The only thing you can do is learn to deal with your anger over the situation.

Just my thoughts.