After all of these years of therapy,working through all the abuse and traumas from the past,I have come to the realization that you never forget.
I guess I was hoping there would be a time where I would just stop thinking about it,that the past would just be the past and I would never take a look back again.It doesn't work that way,unfortunately,but you do get to a point where the past doesn't control the present,where your reactions are no longer those of that abused child,where the thoughts and memories are just thoughts and memories and don't define who you are anymore,where you accept what happened instead of avoiding it and running from it and finally let yourself grieve all the losses and pick yourself up and move on with your life.
But you never forget.
I guess I was hoping there would be a time where I would just stop thinking about it,that the past would just be the past and I would never take a look back again.It doesn't work that way,unfortunately,but you do get to a point where the past doesn't control the present,where your reactions are no longer those of that abused child,where the thoughts and memories are just thoughts and memories and don't define who you are anymore,where you accept what happened instead of avoiding it and running from it and finally let yourself grieve all the losses and pick yourself up and move on with your life.
But you never forget.