A few funnies

[NicNak]

A worker in a chocolate factory fell into a huge vat of chocolate. No one was near by, so he began yelling, "Fire! Fire!"

Eventually, a fellow worker came to his aid and pulled him to safety.

His rescuer asked, "Why were you yelling, 'Fire!'?"

The chocolate dipped employee replied, "I didn't think anyone would come if I yelled, 'Chocolate!'"

------------------------------------------------------------------

A mild-mannered man was tired of being bossed around by his wife, so he went to a psychiatrist.

The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem, and so gave the man a book on assertiveness which he read - and finished - on his way home.

The man stormed into the house and walked up tho his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said "From now on, I want you to know that I am the man of this house, and my word is the law! I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I am finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert. Then after dinner, you're going to draw me a bath so I can relax. And when I am finished with my bath, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"

"The funeral director" replied his wife.

 

[Cat Dancer]

Re: A few funnies.

Ha ha!! Love these.

 

[Banned]

A mild-mannered man was tired of being bossed around by his wife, so he went to a psychiatrist.

The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem, and so gave the man a book on assertiveness which he read - and finished - on his way home.

The man stormed into the house and walked up tho his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said "From now on, I want you to know that I am the man of this house, and my word is the law! I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I am finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert. Then after dinner, you're going to draw me a bath so I can relax. And when I am finished with my bath, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"

"The funeral director" replied his wife.

I like his wife. She's my kind of lady.

 

[Andy]

A worker in a chocolate factory fell into a huge vat of chocolate. No one was near by, so he began yelling, "Fire! Fire!"

Eventually, a fellow worker came to his aid and pulled him to safety.

His rescuer asked, "Why were you yelling, 'Fire!'?"

The chocolate dipped employee replied, "I didn't think anyone would come if I yelled, 'Chocolate!'"

:blush:huh?

---------- Post added at 10:38 PM ---------- Previous post was at 09:09 PM ----------

Come on! Are you going to leave Dum Dum hanging? I don't know why I don't get this?

 

[NicNak]

:blush:huh?
Come on! Are you going to leave Dum Dum hanging? I don't know why I don't get this?

Sorry I though you were doing "huh?" just to be silly.


I am thinking it is cause they all work in a chocolate factory and if he screams "chocolate" it is just a typical thing to hear at the chocolate factory.

 

[Domo]

Maybe because they are working in a chocolate factory, if he yelled out chocolate everyone would just like 'yep, sure is'.

I dunno either haha

Oh beaten to it!

 

[Andy]

Ohhh ok! Well I get that then. First thing that came to my mind was why isn't he yelling for help? lol

Sorry NicNak, I didn't mean to rip apart your joke, I just, I'm dumb normally and without much sleep(I actually got 7 hours)I seem to be just that much more clueless. lol Did you know I put on one shoe and was going to walk out the door this morning? One Shoe!:crazy:

 

[NicNak]

I understand STP, I almost went out without wearing a shirt :blush: Just my jacket and.... well ahem....


I have no idea where my head is at lately. :teehee:

 

[Andy]

Oh! That's a little worse because if you forgot and then unzipped your coat "boing" out come the girls!

I figured out why the worker yelled Fire Fire. It must have been the "Boy who cried wolf" all grown up...:blush: