Acting Like A 2 Year Old...

[Cavi]

I am throwing a fit about something that happened on another board b/c it threw me back into my childhood and I am lashing out and I am spiraling out of control...I don't understand why I can't GROW up mentally/emotionally...

In 3-D I asked someone to stop doing a particular thing with me, now they have stopped and I feel abandoned and thats throwing me in a tizzy...I don't understand me????????????...I pitch a fit b/c someone does X, Y and Z and I hate it at the time but than when they stop, I'm lost.........

I am beginning to think there is no hope for me, after all the therapy I have had and I'm still doing the same old dance.....At this very moment, I feel like that child that was left in a hospital room in 2nd grade for the nurses to comfort...I hate being like this...I hate it!....RIMH

 

[Halo]

I am beginning to think there is no hope for me, after all the therapy I have had and I'm still doing the same old dance

RIMH, there is definitely hope for you and although you have had a lot of therapy, it seems to me that the past therapy that you have had was not that helpful or therapeutic and actually deterimental and therefore you are really just starting the process with your current therapist.

Things don't change overnight but with hard work and committment, I am confident that with your new therapist things will improve.

 

[ThatLady]

Nancy is right, RIMH. Your ex-therapist set you back! Now, you're moving forward again, but the process is still pretty new. Cut yourself some slack. You're putting in the effort, and it will be rewarded over time. :hug:

 

[Cavi]

Thanks...I took some herbs earlier and felt better and now I am spinning my wheels again...I hate this rollercoaster ride I go on...I thought about emailing my T and than I thought why? she can't change it...I feel like someone is sitting on my chest and I need to go to bed...

I am irritable and short fused and its all b/c of feeling abandoned and yet I don't want any part of people...Doesn't make sense to me...I know where the problem is coming from, it happens every year at this time...my moms b-day is Feb 9th and no matter how much I say I'm not going to let it bother me, it does...

I just feel like a keg of dynamite ready to explode!...But as far as the bingeing, Ive been good today so thats a good thing...
Sometimes I think boy I sure could use a session and than the war starts of terminating in my head and the wanting my ex T and I sit here and think geezzzzzzzzz give me a break.....RIMH

 

[Halo]

RIMH,

If you have access to your T's email and she has said that emailing her is okay then I really think that writing out what you are experiencing and feeling in between sessions and keeping her up to date with what is going on is a great idea.

I know that I do it a lot and find it helpful to keep my psych informed of what thoughts, feelings and struggles that I am having and I think that it also helps my psych gain a better insight into what I struggle with when I am not in my sessions.

I am a big fan of writing and providing it to my psych as I have found it to be very helpful for me. It may be something that you want to consider.

Take care