Many people become more withdrawn and quiet when stressed, anxious, or depressed, often as a way of reducing the amount of active stimuli in the environment to bring down anxiety levels to where it feels less overwhelming.
It may well be that this is what is happening for your partner. Have you ever asked her what she wants or needs from you at such times? or if what she needs at such times is simply to be alone and quiet?
At the library or bookstore there are a wide variety of excellent books detailing what is anxiety and what are anxiety attacks. My first books that helped me tremendously to understand that it is not life threatening and that others go through it too were by an author named Dr Claire Weeks [spelling?] But today, there are countless great books. I didnt know if your partner has actual panic attacks to the point of passing out, which I had years ago, several a day in fact, but with treatment, therapy, and proper medication, I now do not have any! No reason for anyone to suffer in silence
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