Almost but then...

[Arnie]

Had a test of my paticence the other night.
Dinner is being prepared (in a rush), my wife, her mom & I are getting ready to go to a movie in less than an hour, and my daughter had unexpectedly invited her boyfriend to dinner. All the rushing around and the short time frame and the additional dinner guest- I was really churning, not angry but agitated, The Plan seemed to be falling apart. I realized there was little I could do, and stepped outside for some air and a break. My wife came out and recognized "the look" on my face. I had already started to calm down and I was able to tell her what had me bugged. We had dinner made the meeting and all was well. The old course of action would have been either A: foul mood and sulking, setting the stage for a blow up in the near future or, B: A blow up on the spot.

Thanks for listening-

Arnie

 

[ThatLady]

Great forward step for you, Arnie! As you found out, just because a plan goes awry, it doesn't necessarily follow that everything is ruined. Often, the very thing that sets the plan awry gives birth to a new, and better, plan. We never know what's around that next bend. Part of the joy of living is to give it a chance to show itself. Enjoy the trip, hon!

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I was really churning, not angry but agitated

I have found that a lot of men who think they are angry and look and act like they are angry actually turn out to be anxious/stressed.

 

[momof5]

Arnie, I'm proud of you that you could take a step outside. It shows that you are gaining strength within to be able to do so.

good job.

I do agree with misntrel also on the anxious/stressed part of the anger.

 

[Arnie]

Thanks momof5.
My latest lesson from counseling was that emotions are strong but rational thought needs to assert control.
I'm also learning to chose my battles; such as making my 13 year old son keep his room clean.
My expectations have been too high, approaching perfection. That ill only lead to disappointment.
Things are looking up here at my place....

 

[momof5]

Arnie, I'm so happy to hear that things are looking up for you.

I have a 12 year old that is totally not neat. Worst out of the 5 children. And he is into drawing, so now we have tons of paper in his room, that he shares with his brother! lol.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

He shares his paper with his brother?

 

[momof5]

He shares his paper with his brother?

sure, the crumpled up ones that he tosses at him ;p>