Communicating with the psychiatrist

[greenstarz]

I don't exactly know how to ask what I'm thinking. Ok, I see my psychiatrist on wednesday and for some reason pschiatrists are very intimidating to me. I always end up just being practically silent and not being able to think of how i feel or have felt since I saw them last. It's hard for me to even evaluate how i've been doing when I am able to think. So my question is, is there a list or anything posted anywhere that lists what the psychiatrist wants to know. what you should be prepared to tell them and what you should say. I want to have something prepared to tell her on wednesday because I always leave feeling like I havne't communicated with her, and then I end up feelilng like it doesn't even matter what i say or if I say anything at all. Last time she thought I was doing really well when I felt horrible earlier in the day, but since I didn;t feel that way when I was in her office i flet like it didn't really matter. another question I have that's unrelated, if you feel bad for a little bit, ad then you feel better, and then you feel all different ways that are distressing but they don't last long, but you never really feel good, well, how do youu tell her that? what is that? I don't know how to communicate with her in other words.

 

[Andy]

I know that mine usually asks about how my eating is, how my sleep is, medication and overall mood, for the general questions I mean.

Maybe you could try sitting down and thinking about things for a bit and write things you would like to tell her down.

 

[greenstarz]

There's some triggering stuff in here, so please be careful.

Thanks for yyour suggesstion. I did it, and now I feel horrible....but its totally not your fault. It was good you told me to do that. I wrote down, honestly this time, how I have been feeling as I can remember it, and it was not so good. I'm scared if I tell her these things, she's going to want to put me back in the hospital for a few reason: 1. I've only been seeing her since Feburary and I don't know if she wants to take chances like how my therapist seems to do when I tell her things. 2. The things I've written are hospitalizable things. I don't feel like I need to go to the hospital AT ALL, but I never feel like I should be hospitalized. Being hospitalized is something I'm totally against.

FOr one, it doesn't keep me safe, I alwys succumb to self injury when in the hospital.. Also, the treatment plans suck in hospitals, its not helpful to me at all. I've been to all the possible groups they can hold already. Another thing is that my anxiety is so much worse in the hospital. But because of my history and things I've done, my psychiatrists seem to go for the hospital option even when I don't agree. As far as how I am doing right now: well, I'm not doing well really. I have a lot of thoughts of SI but I havnet done it in over a week now, but it tends to be bad, but not like it used to be. I;m having OD impulses too, not to kill myself, but just as SI and to escape. I pretty much always have suicide in the back of my mind and its been creeping up closer to the front lately, but I don't think I would try antyhing. I feel like giving up on everything though......but i'm not suicidal.

.the fact that I might tell her all of this is proof that I'm still fighting though. I don't know if I should tell her all of this or not though. It's been so constant for me. I don;t want to maek her mad that I didn't tell her sooner. Plus its really hard for me to tell the real people in my life that I'm not doing well.. I never think its bad enough to really matter.

Also, my mom is always totally upset with me when I'm hospitalized. She always gets really mad and never thinks there's a good reason for it. I don't want to have to tell her, and deal with all of that. I would have to tell her by the way, she is the one that is always forced to transport me to and from the hospital. They won't discharge you to yourself. You have to have someone pick you up. But maybe my psychiatrist wont even consider hospitalization. I don;t know. I;m just scared to be honest with how I feel and am doing.

 

[suewatters1]

I think the best thing is to tell your Psychiatrist everything. It is a way to build trust. I tell my Drs everything. This morning I had my regular appointment with my CMHA worker and for the first time I had the visit at my house. On the veranda for most of it then I showed her the inside the first time in 3 years I have been seeing her. She is coming back to help me clean. I also told her I called the crisis line last night because yesterday was the first day in about 5 months I started having suicide thoughts. This afternoon I had my regular visit with my Psychotherapist and told him the problems I have with SI and medication abuse and the thoughts I had yesterday. I like to get everything out in the open so they will believe me and not doubt if I am hiding anything from them. A couple of times I wrote some stuff down and just gave it to him to read so I wouldn't have to start the conversation. The last time I saw him I had emails of stuff I wrote to my Psychiatrist but didn't want to discuss with him but he extended his hand so he could read them; then he commented on them. Being honest with them mean they will trust what you tell them in the future as being true. My family doesn't realize how stress is affecting me or that I have been doing SI since the fall of 2008 and I hope to keep it that way.

Take Care of Yourself

Sue

 

[Retired]

Hello Greenstarz!

Your psychiatrist is a doctor just like any other doctor, except s/he has specialized in the study and treatment of mental illness. ......and, no..your psychiatrist cannot tell what you are thinking.

So, consider consulting your psychiatrist in the same way you would drive into your neighborhood garage with your old Chevy to talk to the mechanic. Not to trivialize the relationship of your doctor, but each of these people is a professional with specific skills and training.

In order to get the old Chevy back on the road, you might start out by saying to the mechanic, "The reason I'm here is because every time I try to drive uphill, my car begins to chatter and choke and suddenly stops running, no matter what I try to do."

A similar conversation with the psychiatrist might be "The reason I'm here is because every time I try to ________, I feel very (tense, anxious, nervous, sad, frightenened) and no matter what I try to do, I just become very ______________.

All you ned to do is tell the doctor why you are there, and the doctor will usually begin asking questions to gain some insights into your situation.

Remember your psychiatrist should not judge you, and in his/her training just about every situation we humans encounter has been discused, reviewed and probably a person with symptoms just like yours has been seen by your doctor, so you can take comfort in knowing you won't be telling hi/her something theyare unprepared to hear.

Another way to prepare for your meeting is to write a letter to the person who may have caused you pain, if that is the situation, or write a letter to an imaginary friend explaining the pain and difficulty your are experiencing. Describe how it makes you feel and how difficult it might be for your during these times.

Bring the letter to your doctor and let the doctor read it. It is one way that might get the conversation going.

How does the letter idea sound to you?

 

[H011yHawkJ311yBean]

Hey greenstarz, I kind of mentioned my idea like Steve mentioned at your thread here http://forum.psychlinks.ca/general-...t-know-what-to-make-of-this-4.html#post188603

What if you tell your psychiatrist that you really really want to start talking about a LOT of stuff...

-- But tell her you would like to start with one thing. And limit it to a sentence. Or write/type/print it off and give it to her so you don't even have to say anything. Make it the easiest and least triggering thing possible (or non-triggering thing) to tell her/give to her first. Tell her you would prefer she doesn't to react to it yet or ask questions about it yet. Tell her you just want to tell her, and after you tell her you see how that makes you feel or react (you, greenstarz). If you are worried, then ask her before the appointment ends, "So did my telling you this thing make you never want to see me again?" I am sure she will say she still wants to see you as usual for your regular appointments.

-- Then if you want, at the 2nd appointment, you could talk about whatever you want about it, or nothing at all, or tell her how it made you feel to tell her that. You don't have to tell her anything if you don't want to, in fact you could ask her what she thinks: I' guessing you would probably first ask if she was okay with you telling her this one thing, and I am sure she would say she was fine with it. And you would likely ask if she thought you were terrible, and I am sure she would say she didn't think you were terrible at all. Only reason I'm guessing you'd say those exact things is because you were asking in this forum.

I expanded a bit more on a couple of other issues on that other link, but I do wonder if you wanted to talk about something that might be easier to discuss that it would be to discuss your mother. How she behaves toward you, is so indifferent toward you, or acts like you're a big bother in her life... That's neglectful. You might be so used to it and think it is normal, but I have a mother like that. Let me tell you, that if your mother is the way I think she is (like mine), it could explain a lot of things about how you react to things, how you fear things - that is to say, if the one person in your life who is supposed to care about your SI, and supposed to give a damn about you being in a hospital (mental or otherwise), and is supposed to ask you how you are doing and what can she do to help you, it's your mom (this is 'supposed to' be the way it is, but sometimes it isn't). If she was like that to you for your entire life it suggests to me that she and the way she raised you might have a lot to do with how you're handling your situations/life now.

So it's a thought, anyways... Baby steps.

 

[greenstarz]

Sue: Thanks for sharing with me. I think I'm going to be as honest as I can. I never reeally thought about them trusting me like you said, and that for them to really trust me, I have to be completely honest. I just have so many fears that come if I were to really truly be honest. Theres so much they dont know that I would have to tell them if I werre to be completely honest. BUt I'm going to try to start tomorrow at least with some of it. Thanks again for your thoughts.

Steve: I have written a letter andplan on giving it to her. It takes off some of the pressure of trying to talk. I can never actually think while I;m in there. My mind just goes blank and I give up trying to remember things and just act like I'm ok. But the letter will help. I'm going to be really nervous with her knowing all those things about me. She's a relatively new psychiatrist for me and I don't know how she will act.

 

[Retired]

I'm going to be really nervous with her knowing all those things about me.

Because your doctor is a professional, there should be no judgement being made in the disclosures you choose to make. However the more frank and truthful you are in describing your situation and how your situation affects you, your doctor will be able to more effectively offer treatment options best suited to relieve your symptoms.

And, it's perfectly OK to tell the doctor you feel uneasy about disclosing some details because you are concerned about how she might respond. By doing so, you are letting her know about how difficult some of these issues are for you, thereby allowing her to better understand how you feel.

The more your doctor understands how situations and events make you feel. the more information she has to help you.