Compassion Fatigue & Mental Health

[Nanners]

Hi there. New to the forum, and I'm unfortunately dealing with a particular type of psychological issue that means I don't have a lot of mental processing power at the moment. I've got anxiety, depression, and executive dysfunction, and I'm currently suffering from a pretty nasty dose of compassion fatigue. To say that my brain-fog is dense at the moment is a critical understatement.

I was hoping I could use my introductory thread not just to introduce myself, but to ask the friendly folks here to point me to the sub-forums and threads that might best help me out with my current situation.

I am completely depleted and am in crisis -- not a threat to myself or others, but getting close to complete mental and emotional shutdown. I've been considering getting rid of a chunk of my social network because they've been particularly unhelpful (originally wrote "cutting off," but figured that might unnecessarily raise alarm bells for some readers so I changed the wording) but I know that social isolation will make things worse.

I need help figuring out how to have mutually satisfactory relationships with people who are not really there for me emotionally, but who provide a great deal of pragmatic social support (hanging out, getting me out of my house and out of my thoughts, etc.) I have to figure out how to access the support these people provide without flooding them with bids for the kind of support and attention they are unable, or unwilling, to give.

I do have friends and family members who can and do provide emotional support and validation. They are fewer in number and tend to be as introverted and homebody-ish as I am, which can pose a few logistical problems. I don't want to overwhelm them, or anyone, with my emotional needs. I just feel like I'm All Feelings All The Time right now and they're mostly bad feelings. I don't know how to cope, and the patience of the people I see and talk to most often (the big social group above) has started to wear thin.

If anyone can direct me to the part of this forum most likely to help, or suggest any external resources I can look into, I'd be very appreciative.

Thank you.

 

[MHealthJo]

Re: Compassion Fatigue & Mental Health

Are you in therapy, Nanners? The reliable quality support, guidance, insight, and healing that can be received from working fairly long term with a good therapist is invaluable. I often recommend to people that they choose a therapist who can work with modalities such as schema therapy and acceptance and commitment therapy.

It can be a fantastic thing too, when in time via the therapy process and whatever other tools we need to use, we start to come to a place where the life we have and the feelings we have are no longer overwhelming and burdening to us all the time. It's a reality that many people in our lives are not really in the best position to provide ongoing high quality support to another person experiencing crisis or major difficulty, etc. It's great when we eventually find those supports and options that are more equipped for the purpose, and which we can feel more confident are in a fairly stable position for the purpose. It can feel more secure and positive knowing that we have more of a mix of resources to draw upon, and even better when in time we start to heal and feel a little more self-supporting. (Although support and connection are important parts of human life, so it's important to continue keeping some connection and supports around us.)

I do have a great resource I often recommend for a whole range of things people might be going through: the guided meditations at meditationoasis.com , under Listen to Our Podcast, are very soothing and helpful.

 

[Nanners]

Re: Compassion Fatigue & Mental Health

I do have a therapist, though not one I can see long-term. Luckily, this isn't a long-term kind of problem, it's a situational issue brought on by attempting to help someone through their mental illness issues at the expense of my own wellbeing. There are complicating factors which made it difficult for me to identify what was going on until it was too late, but I've since taken steps to reclaim my space and take care of myself.

But there are people related to the situation who promised their support, who have since proven themselves insufficient to the task. I want to keep them in my life but I'm having trouble reconciling the relationships I thought I had with the ones they've turned out to be. They all have valid reasons for being unable to support me, I just wish they'd been honest with me about it so I could have sought other supports out sooner.

What I'm hoping to find here are suggestions for other avenues of support - I'm seeing a psychiatrist and a psychotherapist, I've got plenty of friends and people I can talk to in general, but I need to find some kind of help related to healing and moving on from a very tense and emotionally volatile few months. I can only see my therapist every couple weeks, but I'm experiencing overwhelming negativity, anger, self-doubt, and general cynicism, defeatism, and pessimism on a daily basis.

 

[making_art]

Welcome Nanners!
For yourself perhaps the anxiety and depression forums here would be helpful. Also the self help resources forum. Sorry I cant access the links to them right now but if you click the "forum" tab at the top of the page it will list all the forum topic subforums if you have not found it already.

Another option for you may be to join a face to face support group through Nami. These groups offer great insight into mental illnesses and how to help a friend or family member.....but most importantly how to provide good self care to yourself....