David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
Critical Thinking: Learning to live without beating yourself up
by Jennine Estes
March 18th, 2008
Saying Good-Bye to Critical Thoughts
Summer?s on its way and for San Diego that means it?s a time for beaches, barbeques, and fun in the sun! Many of us find ourselves making healthy decisions like switching to water instead of drinking soda, exercising a couple more times a week, or resisting the urge to eat that second sliver of cake while others sometimes make unhealthy?potentially dangerous?choices in a rush effort to shed those lingering holiday pounds: skipping meals, crash dieting, or running on the treadmill until being on the verge of collapse. Body image is important to most everybody?a fact that is felt even more so in a city known for having beautiful people.
Images seen in magazines of people who have been either professionally trained or surgically sculpted can inadvertently create a sense of anxiety which spurs harmful critical thoughts. Some examples of critical thoughts include the following:
To avoid setting up for failure, we should focus on learning to nurture and care for ourselves and our goals, appreciating the process of achievement instead of setting our sights solely on the outcome. Finding a way to validate our frustrations without the use of critical thoughts and being able to recognize the critical thinking when it hits us in tandem with the ability to decrease both their frequency and impact is key to removing mental roadblocks that prevent us from being where we want to be.
Steps to Stop the Critical Thoughts:
Quick Tips for Whipping Your Thinking into Shape
by Jennine Estes
March 18th, 2008
Saying Good-Bye to Critical Thoughts
Summer?s on its way and for San Diego that means it?s a time for beaches, barbeques, and fun in the sun! Many of us find ourselves making healthy decisions like switching to water instead of drinking soda, exercising a couple more times a week, or resisting the urge to eat that second sliver of cake while others sometimes make unhealthy?potentially dangerous?choices in a rush effort to shed those lingering holiday pounds: skipping meals, crash dieting, or running on the treadmill until being on the verge of collapse. Body image is important to most everybody?a fact that is felt even more so in a city known for having beautiful people.
Images seen in magazines of people who have been either professionally trained or surgically sculpted can inadvertently create a sense of anxiety which spurs harmful critical thoughts. Some examples of critical thoughts include the following:
- ?I am fat. I HAVE to lose weight.?
- ?How come everyone else can lose weight, but I can?t??
- ?I will only be happy if I lose weight.?-?I NEED to go on a diet.?
To avoid setting up for failure, we should focus on learning to nurture and care for ourselves and our goals, appreciating the process of achievement instead of setting our sights solely on the outcome. Finding a way to validate our frustrations without the use of critical thoughts and being able to recognize the critical thinking when it hits us in tandem with the ability to decrease both their frequency and impact is key to removing mental roadblocks that prevent us from being where we want to be.
Steps to Stop the Critical Thoughts:
- Recognize the critical thought: Critical thoughts can rear their ugly heads up to 15 times within half an hour. Note that absolutes and directives such as must, have to, need, and always. Being able to see something that is engrained in our psyche can be difficult at first, but practice will lead to you eventually being able to see the negative critical thoughts so you can block them out altogether!
- Neutralize the power of the critical thought: You?ve identified the thought as being critical, now understand that is self-depreciating, negative, and unrealistic. By seeing these traits within the statement, you will be assisted in seeing the critical thought?s value for what it?s worth?absolutely nothing.
- Counter the critical thought by providing yourself with nurturing and validation: Tell yourself phrases such as ?There is nothing wrong with me .? or ?I am doing a good job.? Saying simple things like, ?I did my best.? And ?I?m getting there.? Are ways of telling yourself that you?re enduring and enjoying the experience the road to achievement is putting you through. Self-talk that reflects back on what you?ve accomplished as opposed to dwelling too much on what you?ve yet to gain help keep you in the moment and prevent you from being overwhelmed by a goal that may yet be a ways off.
- Notice the replacement positive behavior: Critical thoughts will always reside somewhere in your brain, but now you have a grasp on positive reinforcement and gradually the negative self-talk will be replaced with inspiring, success-oriented thinking. Eventually your mind will automatically conjure positive reinforcement in lieu of the damaging critical thinking.
Quick Tips for Whipping Your Thinking into Shape
- Don?t set unrealistic goals
- Avoid influences that spur critical thoughts (magazines, celebrity news shows, etc.)
- Become aware of what the words you telling yourself really mean: know that ?shoulda, coulda, woulda? was yesterday and ?I will.? is a promise.
- Don?t invest your expectations too much into the end result which leads to anxiety and automatic failure?be sure to enjoy the ride getting there.
- Notice critical thoughts, and counter them with nurturing ones.
- Yesterday?s gone; tomorrow isn?t here yet; focus on The Now.
