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TSOW
Its not that I have not had any counseling. I did when I was younger by Dr. Draper who at the time I did not know was abused as well as a child. I suppose I did not think of men being sexually abused. When he said that he understood what I was going through, well I thought how can you understand??? Unless you walk in those shoes? Empthaize etc.. to me would have been a better term.
Well, not long after he passed away, I found out by reading a book that he wrote that he did suffer sexuall abuse as a child. One night after church I asked his wife if I could talk to her. We talked for a very long time, and I apologized to her for her husband, and how I had felt. She as he would have been, was so sweet and understanding about how I felt in regards to this on his behalf. And she confinde things in me that she had never told anyone, and I have not let anyone ever hear as it was in strict confidence.
I have talked to my pastor several times. I don't have any demons left in regards to that part of the abuse. And its good to be able to say that due to the years that it took me to resolve those issues.
Its more the mental abuse and verbal abuse that I went through that sometimes comes back to haunt me. And in a way that is actually self brought on.
I have trouble with learning and I think that Its because I will just never be able to accomplish anything. Then I look at my children, I have accomplished raising wonderful children.
I have to remind myself that its most likley not the past that affects the learning its the things I go through health wise and the stress in the house that interfers with things. I have always been able to put things in perspective. Somtimes it would just take a bit longer, but in the end it gets there.
My youngest needs counseling due to possible bi-ploar. And his father is the type of person who loves to do things to people that he knows they don't like. Could be just a simple little thing, but the more that is done the bigger that little things gets and he just don't get it.
My fear of scheduling is that they will take him from me due to this.
The other issues with hubbie is that I found otu at my daughters wedding that he had started to drink again, which explained to me how he had been treating me for a while, though I passed it off as side effects of his hypoglycemia since he really did not follow his diet correctly.
then on our anniversary I was in bed with a headache. We had my computer up and runing but nto the family one as that needed things installed and a router run. Mine was put here where the old one was. So anythign that he did on the computer was viewable on my desktop. Since I had went to be so early and did not mark any pages for web related learning I had went into history, found out that he was looking up singles and clubs for people seperated and divorced. And while seperated, lol, like that one made any sense.
So I confronted him, and told him that he had no intention of stopping, plus he did this on our anniversary?? First he tried to deny stating that they were pop ups. But searches on Excite.com are not pop ups. duh. Did I have stupid written on my face?
Add to that my neighbor lost her house, the only mom at home other then myself in the neighborhood and her child and my adam grew up together. My brother was in a serious motorcycle accident. My daughter lef her husband twice due to problems there that were legitmate. And that I could nto share as it was confidential. No body knows it. Now my thyroid is swollen. The part that is left after 21 years finally decides it wants to be a trouble maker!
I suppose my point is that the demons of the past were basicaly taken care of. What is hapening now is related to now. Health issues on my part, and family issues.
Sorry, I hate to ramble like this as I dont' wish to appear as if I am wining, I have a good life with my children. They are very good children, and I was so blessed. And I will learn web design, it is just taking me longer as I do have to pace myself. My goal is to become self supportive.
ss:
Thanks for your prayers. They are important and I greatly appreciate them.
Its not that I have not had any counseling. I did when I was younger by Dr. Draper who at the time I did not know was abused as well as a child. I suppose I did not think of men being sexually abused. When he said that he understood what I was going through, well I thought how can you understand??? Unless you walk in those shoes? Empthaize etc.. to me would have been a better term.
Well, not long after he passed away, I found out by reading a book that he wrote that he did suffer sexuall abuse as a child. One night after church I asked his wife if I could talk to her. We talked for a very long time, and I apologized to her for her husband, and how I had felt. She as he would have been, was so sweet and understanding about how I felt in regards to this on his behalf. And she confinde things in me that she had never told anyone, and I have not let anyone ever hear as it was in strict confidence.
I have talked to my pastor several times. I don't have any demons left in regards to that part of the abuse. And its good to be able to say that due to the years that it took me to resolve those issues.
Its more the mental abuse and verbal abuse that I went through that sometimes comes back to haunt me. And in a way that is actually self brought on.
I have trouble with learning and I think that Its because I will just never be able to accomplish anything. Then I look at my children, I have accomplished raising wonderful children.
I have to remind myself that its most likley not the past that affects the learning its the things I go through health wise and the stress in the house that interfers with things. I have always been able to put things in perspective. Somtimes it would just take a bit longer, but in the end it gets there.
My youngest needs counseling due to possible bi-ploar. And his father is the type of person who loves to do things to people that he knows they don't like. Could be just a simple little thing, but the more that is done the bigger that little things gets and he just don't get it.
My fear of scheduling is that they will take him from me due to this.
The other issues with hubbie is that I found otu at my daughters wedding that he had started to drink again, which explained to me how he had been treating me for a while, though I passed it off as side effects of his hypoglycemia since he really did not follow his diet correctly.
then on our anniversary I was in bed with a headache. We had my computer up and runing but nto the family one as that needed things installed and a router run. Mine was put here where the old one was. So anythign that he did on the computer was viewable on my desktop. Since I had went to be so early and did not mark any pages for web related learning I had went into history, found out that he was looking up singles and clubs for people seperated and divorced. And while seperated, lol, like that one made any sense.
So I confronted him, and told him that he had no intention of stopping, plus he did this on our anniversary?? First he tried to deny stating that they were pop ups. But searches on Excite.com are not pop ups. duh. Did I have stupid written on my face?
Add to that my neighbor lost her house, the only mom at home other then myself in the neighborhood and her child and my adam grew up together. My brother was in a serious motorcycle accident. My daughter lef her husband twice due to problems there that were legitmate. And that I could nto share as it was confidential. No body knows it. Now my thyroid is swollen. The part that is left after 21 years finally decides it wants to be a trouble maker!
I suppose my point is that the demons of the past were basicaly taken care of. What is hapening now is related to now. Health issues on my part, and family issues.
Sorry, I hate to ramble like this as I dont' wish to appear as if I am wining, I have a good life with my children. They are very good children, and I was so blessed. And I will learn web design, it is just taking me longer as I do have to pace myself. My goal is to become self supportive.
ss:
Thanks for your prayers. They are important and I greatly appreciate them.
TSOW
Its not that I have not had any counseling. I did when I was younger by Dr. Draper who at the time I did not know was abused as well as a child. I suppose I did not think of men being sexually abused. When he said that he understood what I was going through, well I thought how can you understand??? Unless you walk in those shoes? Empthaize etc.. to me would have been a better term.
Well, not long after he passed away, I found out by reading a book that he wrote that he did suffer sexuall abuse as a child. One night after church I asked his wife if I could talk to her. We talked for a very long time, and I apologized to her for her husband, and how I had felt. She as he would have been, was so sweet and understanding about how I felt in regards to this on his behalf. And she confinde things in me that she had never told anyone, and I have not let anyone ever hear as it was in strict confidence.
I have talked to my pastor several times. I don't have any demons left in regards to that part of the abuse. And its good to be able to say that due to the years that it took me to resolve those issues.
Its more the mental abuse and verbal abuse that I went through that sometimes comes back to haunt me. And in a way that is actually self brought on.
I have trouble with learning and I think that Its because I will just never be able to accomplish anything. Then I look at my children, I have accomplished raising wonderful children.
I have to remind myself that its most likley not the past that affects the learning its the things I go through health wise and the stress in the house that interfers with things. I have always been able to put things in perspective. Somtimes it would just take a bit longer, but in the end it gets there.
My youngest needs counseling due to possible bi-ploar. And his father is the type of person who loves to do things to people that he knows they don't like. Could be just a simple little thing, but the more that is done the bigger that little things gets and he just don't get it.
My fear of scheduling is that they will take him from me due to this.
The other issues with hubbie is that I found otu at my daughters wedding that he had started to drink again, which explained to me how he had been treating me for a while, though I passed it off as side effects of his hypoglycemia since he really did not follow his diet correctly.
then on our anniversary I was in bed with a headache. We had my computer up and runing but nto the family one as that needed things installed and a router run. Mine was put here where the old one was. So anythign that he did on the computer was viewable on my desktop. Since I had went to be so early and did not mark any pages for web related learning I had went into history, found out that he was looking up singles and clubs for people seperated and divorced. And while seperated, lol, like that one made any sense.
So I confronted him, and told him that he had no intention of stopping, plus he did this on our anniversary?? First he tried to deny stating that they were pop ups. But searches on Excite.com are not pop ups. duh. Did I have stupid written on my face?
Add to that my neighbor lost her house, the only mom at home other then myself in the neighborhood and her child and my adam grew up together. My brother was in a serious motorcycle accident. My daughter lef her husband twice due to problems there that were legitmate. And that I could nto share as it was confidential. No body knows it. Now my thyroid is swollen. The part that is left after 21 years finally decides it wants to be a trouble maker!
I suppose my point is that the demons of the past were basicaly taken care of. What is hapening now is related to now. Health issues on my part, and family issues.
Sorry, I hate to ramble like this as I dont' wish to appear as if I am wining, I have a good life with my children. They are very good children, and I was so blessed. And I will learn web design, it is just taking me longer as I do have to pace myself. My goal is to become self supportive.
ss:
Thanks for your prayers. They are important and I greatly appreciate them.
Its not that I have not had any counseling. I did when I was younger by Dr. Draper who at the time I did not know was abused as well as a child. I suppose I did not think of men being sexually abused. When he said that he understood what I was going through, well I thought how can you understand??? Unless you walk in those shoes? Empthaize etc.. to me would have been a better term.
Well, not long after he passed away, I found out by reading a book that he wrote that he did suffer sexuall abuse as a child. One night after church I asked his wife if I could talk to her. We talked for a very long time, and I apologized to her for her husband, and how I had felt. She as he would have been, was so sweet and understanding about how I felt in regards to this on his behalf. And she confinde things in me that she had never told anyone, and I have not let anyone ever hear as it was in strict confidence.
I have talked to my pastor several times. I don't have any demons left in regards to that part of the abuse. And its good to be able to say that due to the years that it took me to resolve those issues.
Its more the mental abuse and verbal abuse that I went through that sometimes comes back to haunt me. And in a way that is actually self brought on.
I have trouble with learning and I think that Its because I will just never be able to accomplish anything. Then I look at my children, I have accomplished raising wonderful children.
I have to remind myself that its most likley not the past that affects the learning its the things I go through health wise and the stress in the house that interfers with things. I have always been able to put things in perspective. Somtimes it would just take a bit longer, but in the end it gets there.
My youngest needs counseling due to possible bi-ploar. And his father is the type of person who loves to do things to people that he knows they don't like. Could be just a simple little thing, but the more that is done the bigger that little things gets and he just don't get it.
My fear of scheduling is that they will take him from me due to this.
The other issues with hubbie is that I found otu at my daughters wedding that he had started to drink again, which explained to me how he had been treating me for a while, though I passed it off as side effects of his hypoglycemia since he really did not follow his diet correctly.
then on our anniversary I was in bed with a headache. We had my computer up and runing but nto the family one as that needed things installed and a router run. Mine was put here where the old one was. So anythign that he did on the computer was viewable on my desktop. Since I had went to be so early and did not mark any pages for web related learning I had went into history, found out that he was looking up singles and clubs for people seperated and divorced. And while seperated, lol, like that one made any sense.
So I confronted him, and told him that he had no intention of stopping, plus he did this on our anniversary?? First he tried to deny stating that they were pop ups. But searches on Excite.com are not pop ups. duh. Did I have stupid written on my face?
Add to that my neighbor lost her house, the only mom at home other then myself in the neighborhood and her child and my adam grew up together. My brother was in a serious motorcycle accident. My daughter lef her husband twice due to problems there that were legitmate. And that I could nto share as it was confidential. No body knows it. Now my thyroid is swollen. The part that is left after 21 years finally decides it wants to be a trouble maker!
I suppose my point is that the demons of the past were basicaly taken care of. What is hapening now is related to now. Health issues on my part, and family issues.
Sorry, I hate to ramble like this as I dont' wish to appear as if I am wining, I have a good life with my children. They are very good children, and I was so blessed. And I will learn web design, it is just taking me longer as I do have to pace myself. My goal is to become self supportive.
ss:
Thanks for your prayers. They are important and I greatly appreciate them.
Cat Dancer
MVP
You don't seem like you're complaining at all. That's a lot of hard stuff to deal with. I wish that we could all just get a break for awhile from all the hard things in life.
Cat Dancer
MVP
You don't seem like you're complaining at all. That's a lot of hard stuff to deal with. I wish that we could all just get a break for awhile from all the hard things in life.
janetr said:
Hi Janetr, how are you? How have you been feeling? I hope all is going pretty decent for you.
I sometimes wish I could get away as well. I told hubbie the other night when he was doing his tormenting. That I was going to sign myself in somewhere so that I would not have to deal with any of this any more. But I could nto do that as I would never leave Joey alone with him.
also in my fms forum, someone has a sig regarding an oak. An oak becomes strong because of the storms it faces. Its actually one of the most strongest trees to have around you in a storm. I hope that when I am in someones storm that I am strong enough in my roots to help them out.
janetr said:
Hi Janetr, how are you? How have you been feeling? I hope all is going pretty decent for you.
I sometimes wish I could get away as well. I told hubbie the other night when he was doing his tormenting. That I was going to sign myself in somewhere so that I would not have to deal with any of this any more. But I could nto do that as I would never leave Joey alone with him.
also in my fms forum, someone has a sig regarding an oak. An oak becomes strong because of the storms it faces. Its actually one of the most strongest trees to have around you in a storm. I hope that when I am in someones storm that I am strong enough in my roots to help them out.
Cat Dancer
MVP
I am just kind of numb, trying to not care about things right now. Sometimes that seems the best way to cope.
I like your description of an oak tree and its strength. That's a good analogy.
I can relate to the issue of tormenting. My husband is like that too. He thinks doing things that bother people is so funny. Maybe it is to him, but not to the person being bullied. I don't understand that way of being at all.
Thanks for asking about me. Take care and I hope you can straighten things out with the thyroid issue.
I like your description of an oak tree and its strength. That's a good analogy.
I can relate to the issue of tormenting. My husband is like that too. He thinks doing things that bother people is so funny. Maybe it is to him, but not to the person being bullied. I don't understand that way of being at all.
Thanks for asking about me. Take care and I hope you can straighten things out with the thyroid issue.
Cat Dancer
MVP
I am just kind of numb, trying to not care about things right now. Sometimes that seems the best way to cope.
I like your description of an oak tree and its strength. That's a good analogy.
I can relate to the issue of tormenting. My husband is like that too. He thinks doing things that bother people is so funny. Maybe it is to him, but not to the person being bullied. I don't understand that way of being at all.
Thanks for asking about me. Take care and I hope you can straighten things out with the thyroid issue.
I like your description of an oak tree and its strength. That's a good analogy.
I can relate to the issue of tormenting. My husband is like that too. He thinks doing things that bother people is so funny. Maybe it is to him, but not to the person being bullied. I don't understand that way of being at all.
Thanks for asking about me. Take care and I hope you can straighten things out with the thyroid issue.
Cat Dancer
MVP
Thank you for your kindness. It means a lot to me. 
Cat Dancer
MVP
Thank you for your kindness. It means a lot to me.
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