Feeling like crap

[Meggylou]

I'm feeling pretty rough today.
I had to travel a total of 9 hours in a school bus on Sunday with my client to and from toronto for a raptors game. My back went all kablooey and I am tired and out of medication. Should have called last week to get an appointment but it's too late now, am going next week.
I need to go to the clinic to get more. I can't think properly, my heart burn is insane, I feel just so out of it, unmotivated, sore, sad, angry, very frustrated and the anger is driving me nuts!! I just don't know what to do with myself. Got in a fight with hubby this morning so that didn't help things.
It's november so this seasonal depression I get is right on schedule. I was SOOOOO hoping that it wouldn't bother me much this year. I'm reducing my celexa on psychiatrist orders, but maybe I shouldn't, maybe if I stay on it it will help me?? I don't know I'm so frustrated with everything. With a full course load in fourth year uni, and feeling this way, I've missed a lot of class lately with being sick in one way or another so that is so stressful on it's own without this to deal with. I just don't know how to help myself. When your brain doesn't work right what the heck am I supposed to do, it's just such a maze right now. :hissyfit:

 

[David Baxter PhD]

One bit of advice I would give you is try to contact your profs and make sure as early as possible that they are aware that you may have difficulties with deadlines and/or exams. Many or most professors and universities are willing to make special arrangements but if you wait until you've failed an exam or assignment it makes accomodating your needs much more difficult.

 

[Meggylou]

I'm not late or missing anything, I've been good about that, it's just the class time that I miss and that is so important in doing well. I do get special accomodations here, which are a blessing, I just hate telling people why I miss class....they always look at me differently after and it sucks.

 

[Sparrow]

Hi Megglou,

If you miss classes, do you note share with a buddy or friend on what you missed? Maybe you already do that, but I suppose even that doesn't help if attendance is part of any final grading.
Apart from :hair: I sense maybe you are spreading yourself out too thin?
When I'm all screwed up I try to write down my priorities on a piece of paper (short list!). It's a reminder of focus and direction for me.
I would feel your health/meds etc. should be very close to the top of that list, and not to let it sink low in some juggling :juggle: act of the season upon us.
I saw your mood setting after I read your post and it made a lot of sense to me. Did you read one of David's latest articles...
How to take advantage of the holidays and stave off stress, anxiety, and depression - Psychlinks Psychology Self-Help & Mental Health Support Forum
It was another good reminder for me.
I wish I could help you more somehow... :support:

 

[Meggylou]

I should make a list. I love lists.
My thing is, I make these lists and then don't do the things aftewards. I have a chronic procrastination issue. Gah, just feeling SOOOOOO unmotivated lately. It's like the great motivation I had at the start of the semester is done. I must have been slightly hypomanic and am now coming down a bit. That's how I feel at least. Just blue and tired, tired on so many levels. I think that my friend on here darkestburningstar and I are going to go work out tomorrow hopefully. I think that will help me to feel a bit better, just to do something physically, my body needs it. I've been putting on weight and eating really badly. I just feel like I've given up on my body. I know this is the wrong way to feel but I just feel that way. I just don't care anymore about my fatness, hairyness, zittyness you name it. I just don't care....I feel hopeless about it so why bother ya know?? I'm also kinda of scared to be "intimate" with my husband because we only use condoms...the pill makes me really depressed, and neither of us have had "the" surgery. I'm not allowed because I'm "too young and haven't had enough children" or any children. Who is the health care system to say what I can/can't do with my own body. The entire thing is stressful for me. Because I KNOW that if I was to get pregnant I'd either have to stop my meds completely....and go nuts, OR I'd not know and the fetus would be damaged. Gah what a stressful thing to be scared about. I'm just such a mess lately it's not fun, not fun at all.

 

[Cat Dancer]

Sorry you're having so much stress. It definitely isn't fun at all.

 

[Daniel E.]

I think that will help me to feel a bit better, just to do something physically, my body needs it.

And exercise can facilitate learning in other ways as well, like making it easier to establish connections between the neurons or whatever

When I was in college, I just considered it a good semester if I didn't withdraw Midterms and finals were obviously the most stressful times for a procrastinator like myself. If I didn't quit by midterms, I was usually going to make it through