Girl's shyness is dangerous?

[lotaloi]

Hi everybody,

I 'm brand new in this forum and this is my first thread. I'm a gr 12 immigrant student. I don't know whether it is a forum to ask this type of thing or not.

Anyway , are those kinda a girl or even men are good who is shy or introvert type?

I think it is hard to interact with them as they don't talk that much that we can understand them very well. It's easy to understand someone who talks a lot( not who repeats one thing again & again). Face is the mirror of mind, but it can't help to figure out a person's type that much unless lot's of talk and interaction happens.

The question is, are those kinda girls even men good? I kinda fear them as I can't read their mind due to less talk. Am I right or wrong?

 

[Daniel E.]

Welcome to the forum!

but it can't help to figure out a person's type that much unless lot's of talk and interaction happens.

A lot of shy people can be quite talkative among their friends and family. It's not unlike babies that are said to take longer to warm up to a stranger (stranger anxiety).

Anyway , are those kinda a girl or even men are good who is shy or introvert type?

As a shy introvert, I would definitely think so My favorite point about introversion/extraversion:

A person who acts introverted in one scenario may act extraverted in another.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraversion_and_introversion

 

[Andy]

Welcome lotaloi:2thumbs:

I don't think an introvert or shy person is any different than anyone else you interact with. I am a shy person and I don't think I am a bad person or should be feared. It just takes me a little while to feel comfortable around people i don't know well. as Daniel suggested, when I am around family and friends I know well I can be just as talkative as they can be.
I don't agree that the face is the mirror of the mind. I'm sure that a lot of shy people would slowly open up to you if you engaged them in conversation more, and maybe if it was more of a one on one situation. I know a lot of time I wanted to join in but I was to anxious about doing so. If someone came up and really talked and tried to include me I would feel a lot more comfortable. I know it's hard to pull conversation from some people but there is no harm in trying.
I think the only way to try to understand someone is to talk with them, since no one can read minds. I could have a big smile on my face but be terribly sad, there is no way to tell what someone is thinking.

If you fear introverts because you are uncertain about them just remember that they are probably a little uneasy toward you as well because it's not normal for them to be an extrovert.

 

[lotaloi]

Welcome lotaloi:2thumbs:

If you fear introverts because you are uncertain about them just remember that they are probably a little uneasy toward you as well because it's not normal for them to be an extrovert.

No,actually I didn't mean that bad just wanted to say they might be hard to understand as they don't react or talk a lot sothat u can figure out their personalities. That is simple. Personally I like people who talks a lot(not repeating same thing), their mind is more transparent. Even when u with ur partner, this quality will help u a lot. As an e.g. people who are not cazy or introvert they are free to deal with b/c once u have clash (cold mental war) u can easily figure out why he/she is avoiding or not liking u.U will know where is the wrong. The reason is the talkative and extrovert can't keep his/anger inside; it would burst out. They would say why this happened or ............. and u will be able to get along with him/her better in future. That's what I meant. Very simple.
Sorry for my bad English.

 

[Daniel E.]

As an e.g. people who are not cazy or introvert they are free to deal with b/c once u have clash (cold mental war) u can easily figure out why he/she is avoiding or not liking

You are overgeneralizing about introversion or seem to confuse introversion with something else, especially since a large percentage of the population is more introverted than extraverted.

And, again, a person who is introverted and/or shy in public may be quite talkative and expressive in private. For example:

Seen another way, someone with a small number of friends has more time and attention for each. Perhaps those friendships have more depth. Perhaps. Or maybe not. Maybe we're all just different.I'm not particularly comfortable being friends with people who have bajillions of friends--my perception is that I'm lost in a crowd. I prefer feeling special.

Seeing Life Through Introvert Eyes | Psychology Today

Some generalities:

Introverts

• Enjoy time alone
• Consider only deep relationships as friends
• Feel drained after outside activities, even if they were fun
• Good listener
• Appear calm and self-contained
• Think then speak or act

Extroverts

• Like to be in the thick of things
• Relish variety
• Know lots of people, considers lots of people friends
• Enjoy chit-chatting, even to strangers
• Feel stoked after activity
• Speak or act then think OR think while speaking

http://forum.psychlinks.ca/shyness-...ity-social-anxiety-what-s-the-difference.html

By the way, "crazy" is a pejorative term that doesn't really apply to anyone as it has no scientific meaning.

 

[lotaloi]

By the way, "crazy" is a pejorative term that doesn't really apply to anyone as it has no scientific meaning.[/QUOTE]

Sorry, it was not" crazy" it was"cagey" a spelling mistake. Yah, it is good to be someone special other than being lost in crows of millions of friends.
The best way is to balance with both sides.
I had 1 female classmates she was very shy and less talking. I always think she might be less helpful than others as she is introvert to the class. As an e.g.,it is hard to get a phone number from a shy introvert female classmates so I can't know what is the assignment for tomorrow. To get her phone number, it would take a long time. Other classmate was opposite so I chose her as a friend as I probably will have more understanding of her. If I want the first one maybe it would take more time but I don't, even no one has. However, as a friend cagey girls even men are not preferable. U can't know them quickly.

 

[Andy]

The best way is to balance with both sides.

I had 1 female classmates she was very shy and less talking. I always think she might be less helpful than others as she is introvert to the class. As an e.g.,it is hard to get a phone number from a shy introvert female classmates so I can't know what is the assignment for tomorrow. To get her phone number, it would take a long time. Other classmate was opposite so I chose her as a friend as I probably will have more understanding of her. If I want the first one maybe it would take more time but I don't, even no one has. However, as a friend cagey girls even men are not preferable. U can't know them quickly.

I agree with the first statement in this quote. It would be great to be a person that is more a balance of introvert and extrovert.

As far as the rest, saying that "cagey girls even men are not preferable..." I am assuming you mean that as your personal opinion only, and not a general statement. With your example up there, there could be so many other things going on. Maybe the girl doesn't want to give out her phone number to someone she doesn't know, for example.
Everyone has there preference in the type of friends they would like to have. Maybe that girl doesn't like extroverts.
If you don't have time to make friends with the shy types then stick with the extroverts. Nothing wrong with that.