Help with Jealousy, Shame, Guilt

[teacupmama]

Is it normal to be jealous of a child? I think not. A friend of mine tells me she is jealous of her own grand daughter. The grand daughter is child of her step daughter that has caused her and her husband lots of trouble raising her and still is a burden to them financially. The grandfather insists on watching the grand daughter 2x a week and does most of the work but she feels like she doesn't have a choice in the matter and is still raising their own teen age daughter. My friend has many health problems fatigue and is pretty burned out. The health problems she feels originated from step parenting her husbands 3 kids and then her own colicky high need daughter later in life. Contending with the kids psychotic birth mother and her husband is a type a perfectionist with ocd. She feels very guilty for having these feelings especially because the grand daughter is only 2 and has special needs. How can I help my friend not feel such resentment and then guilt.

 

[forgetmenot]

Re: Help with Jelousy, Shame, Guilt.

Your friend sound like she is burn out from being a carer to so many I think she is in need of some professional care herself She resents i think the fact noone sees she needs help and care herself Suggest to your friend to get some help to just get someone she can talk to a professional that can help her deal with her emoitions. Tell her she is worth it ok she deserves to be cared for too

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I agree with Eclipse's recommendation. You can be a friend but you cannot be your friend's therapist.