So brief little intro to my backround.
So I have had a history of being a alcholic from 15 to 19, had around a year off the booze.
Then got on to benzos just before I was 20 and then on heroin at 20, then from March this year started my detox of heroin and benzos, using Subutex to get off the heroin, and valium to get off the benzos. Im nearing the end of my detox of the valium on the last week now! On 2mg of Valium having been at a peak of at least 15+ x 10mg valium a day.... now I never used them to sleep, I just plan enjoyed them... so far it has not been to bad, but IM getting nervous about what its going to be like next friday after my last dose, excited but nervous.... I have epilepsy so im nervous about having seizures, but the main part is staying clean, iv been an addict of some sort since i have been 15 on earth am I going to stay clean. I know I need to.... I just dont really know how to function without being 'out of it'
Then next by far the biggest thing is going to be in 6 weeks or so when I get off my Subutex, that is going to be TOUGH, but i worry im going to use valium to make it easier EVEN though I know I cant, it would be stupid of me, but when you are feeling 'sick' due to lack of opiates you will do anything to make yourself feel better.... i cant imagine my self using heroin, but benzos YEP I really can....
And also staying clean like the benzos, im just wanna know what the hell i can do, yeah stay busy as possible and all that, but I just dont trust myself to get a job, start earning cash, and being responsible with it... its going to be hard, i know that.... I really dont wanna mess up... im only 21 i gotta get my sh*t together!!
thanks... have any questions just post em. easy.
So I have had a history of being a alcholic from 15 to 19, had around a year off the booze.
Then got on to benzos just before I was 20 and then on heroin at 20, then from March this year started my detox of heroin and benzos, using Subutex to get off the heroin, and valium to get off the benzos. Im nearing the end of my detox of the valium on the last week now! On 2mg of Valium having been at a peak of at least 15+ x 10mg valium a day.... now I never used them to sleep, I just plan enjoyed them... so far it has not been to bad, but IM getting nervous about what its going to be like next friday after my last dose, excited but nervous.... I have epilepsy so im nervous about having seizures, but the main part is staying clean, iv been an addict of some sort since i have been 15 on earth am I going to stay clean. I know I need to.... I just dont really know how to function without being 'out of it'
Then next by far the biggest thing is going to be in 6 weeks or so when I get off my Subutex, that is going to be TOUGH, but i worry im going to use valium to make it easier EVEN though I know I cant, it would be stupid of me, but when you are feeling 'sick' due to lack of opiates you will do anything to make yourself feel better.... i cant imagine my self using heroin, but benzos YEP I really can....
And also staying clean like the benzos, im just wanna know what the hell i can do, yeah stay busy as possible and all that, but I just dont trust myself to get a job, start earning cash, and being responsible with it... its going to be hard, i know that.... I really dont wanna mess up... im only 21 i gotta get my sh*t together!!
thanks... have any questions just post em. easy.