Horrible, terrible, evil monster

[Cat Dancer]

I'm putting this here because I KNOW these are OCD thoughts I have about myself. I am trying to do the Four Steps for dealing with OCD and I understand the first one and can do it, but I just cannot seem to understand and do the second step which is reattribute. I read the description over and over and it won't sink into my brain. Is it just me being stubborn about it? Is there a really simple way to explain it? I just need simple.

 

[Mari]

Simple would be nice I could use some help with this also so I did a quick search and it does look like a lot of reading and a lot to understand so hopefully I can get to it later. I just want to check with you if these are the four steps you are referring to?

Step 1: Relabel
Step 2: Reattribute
Step 3: Refocus
Step 4: Revalue

 

[Cat Dancer]

Yes, those are the four steps.

 

[H011yHawkJ311yBean]

I read up on it... I think to reattribute means that you are mindful that the thoughts and feelings that lead to your OCD behaviours and thinking are about chemical/biological/neurons and things going off in your brain, and not actually happening, or don't need to happen...

 

[David Baxter PhD]

All explained here: The Four Steps - Dr Jeffrey Schwartz - Brain Lock - Psychlinks Forum

 

[Mari]

Step 1: Relabel
You are one step ahead of me CD because I have trouble recognizing obsessive thoughts/compulsions so I will start with something simple ? counting. So in step one I relabel counting as obsessive/compulsive.

Step 2: Reattribute
When I started counting there was a need/reason which is no longer valid but I continue because it is obsessive/compulsive. So in step 2 I need to reattribute the counting as unnecessary, ignore the thoughts and not act on them.


Step 3: Refocus
Now when I get in the elevator instead of counting how many tiled mirrors there are I focus on how pretty they look. So in step 3 I refocus to another more pleasant thought/behaviour instead of counting.

Step 4: Revalue
The thoughts will not instantly vanish but I can control the behaviour and refuse to count. So in step 4 I revalue by not giving high importance/significance to counting and switch to thoughts/behaviour that are of more value to me.

Now my brain really hurts but I think I might understand it enough to apply it to my homework which involves a much more difficult obsession/compulsion that my therapist would like me to work on this week. Thank-you for your help CD

 

[Cat Dancer]

All explained here: The Four Steps - Dr Jeffrey Schwartz - Brain Lock - Psychlinks Forum

I have read that a lot and I don't know, maybe I'm trying to be difficult, but I understand the first step and the last two, but the second one just doesn't make sense to me. Or maybe it's because I blame myself for the OCD? I am sorry. I am sorry for being difficult.

 

[H011yHawkJ311yBean]

If I am not mistaken, I believe what step 2 is trying to explain:

Don't attribute things like tapping, counting, or obsessive or compulsive thoughts/behaviour to something like "magical thinking," blaming yourself, blaming others, or other things that seem like "reasons."

Instead attribute those thoughts/behaviours to your mind/brain.

Remind yourself, okay, I want to wash my hands a million times. But I don't have to. It's just my chemicals in my brain that make me THINK I need to wash my hands over and over.

I would assume if you become mindful of this, that would help you in a huge way. If you start to become mindful of all your OCD behaviours, and get to the point where you automatically remind yourself that there is no reason why they occur other than something in your brain/chemical makeup.

Would you find it easier to accept the thoughts as just being something your mind is conjuring up (not something you can always control with medication, but meds probably helps)? Because if you know it is in your mind, and that you don't have to listen to the thoughts telling you to do things, then YOU would have more control over your behaviours. Yes?

 

[Cat Dancer]

You know what is so hard? I start saying the steps in my head and then THEY get stuck repeating over and over and over. I just want all of this to stop. I want it to stop. Things inside my head change, but it is the same if that makes sense. I can get one phrase out, but another takes over and it's really sinister when the phrases are the ones meant to help me. I can't make sense of it because the anxiety gets so high. I just get so confused.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

What are your current medications and doses, CD? And are you taking them regularly as directed by your doctors?

 

[Cat Dancer]

I take 80 mg of prozac and I am taking it every day. I can take 1.5 mg of ativan a day in .5 mg doses and I space it out through the day and I am taking everything as prescribed. I just don't think it's working anymore or like it should. I also have the anemia which I'm taking the iron for. And I wonder if there are hormonal issues too. I am trying. My doctor isn't sure what else to put me on because I've been on most everything and in different combinations.

 

[H011yHawkJ311yBean]

I have some wonky hormonal issues... I am on cipralex and wellbutrin, but my physician referred me to a gynecologist. She, the gynecologist, thinks my hormones are causing me more stress... I might be put on progesterone... Have you asked anyone about hormone therapy?

 

[Cat Dancer]

I will email my doctor and see if she can run some tests.

---------- Post Merged on August 27th, 2014 at 12:08 AM ---------- Previous Post was on August 26th, 2014 at 07:10 PM ----------

I am just so tired. I am so tired of the voice in my head, my own stupid voice. I am so tired. I am not giving up, but I just need peace and silence in my head. I would love to take a vacation, go to the beach and just sit and watch the ocean waves. That would be nice.

 

[Retired]

I frequently use a beach relaxation script I made up years ago that helps me. There is nothing like the sound of the waves, the breaking of the ripples across the rocks and the ebb and flow of the water with the heat of the sun to feel relaxed.

You might care to try the following beach relaxation imagery script to see if it might help.

A Psychlinks thread you might find informative if you use some of the recommended techniques is HERE

Another similar thread that contains similar recommendations, with additional resources you might find helpful is HERE

 

[Cat Dancer]

Right now I just can't seem to separate the thoughts out as being untrue. I feel like I AM those things. I can't be around people. I ruin them. There is a lot of proof of this in the past and in the now.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

There is no proof in the past or the present that your OCD thoughts are accurate. And there is considerable proof that those thoughts are lies. They represent fears, not truths.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[H011yHawkJ311yBean]

OK, I don't have OCD, CatDancer, so I don't have to remind myself or tell myself that nothing will happen to anyone if I do or don't do something. I just know that something I do won't be the reason that something happens or does not happen to someone else.

Even if I told someone something in confidence about myself that was harmless to them and they didn't talk to me anymore, I would think the problem/result of them leaving lies with THEM. I didn't make them walk away.

Also if I don't jiggle the lock on the door 10 times before I go into my house, nothing bad will happen because of it. If I just walk into my house like everyone else in the world, and sit down and watch TV, and not worry that something bad is going to happen to a loved one, and something happens to someone I love, it won't be because of me not jiggling the lock. I will know that. Some other set of circumstances beyond my control happened to affect this person. Sure I would feel bad that this person fell ill, or got into an accident, or got his wallet stolen, or whatever, but it would be with empathy... Not because I felt I somehow caused this to happen.

So when you are doing something because you believe that if you don't something bad will happen, that is when you have to remind yourself, nothing will happen because of you. This is your mind trying to trick you into thinking that if you don't do it, something will happen. But that's not a fact. You have to convince yourself to not do something just because you feel it will cause someone/yourself else harm. How can you control what someone else is doing? You can't. You can't control another person/lightning/lottery win/fortunate circumstances or other things. If you just think or feel you "know" something, but there is no proof, then it's your OCD trying to egg you on. Thinking something and feeling something doesn't make it happen. If you have proof that's another thing: probably not OCD.

I'm sure you've heard this enough times. And it's hard to accept. But once you do accept it, and you fight it instead of embracing it, you may one day have more control over your OCD behaviours/thoughts.

Go for it CD!!! ♥

 

[Cat Dancer]

One thing that is hard is that I don't have an official diagnosis of OCD anymore. The psychologist who did testing on me said I got very high scores for OCD, but she wasn't diagnosing me with it. So I kind of tell myself that I can't say "it's just my OCD" because I don't really have OCD. So I can't use the four steps because I do not have it. It's confusing.

 

[Banned]

When you were using the four steps did they help?

 

[Mari]

I do not think it matters about the diagnosis, you need to do what is helpful for you. I reviewed the four steps again and followed the beach relaxation tape and I do feel a bit better for it. For a hopefully helpful repeat from DB "They represent fears, not truths".