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Daniel E.

daniel@psychlinks.ca
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Two-Minute Memoir: Traveling on Charm Alone
by Leon Logothetis
Psychology Today

There are moments in our lives when we have the choice to embrace opportunity and redefine ourselves or continue down the well-trodden path of mediocrity. I faced one such crossroad a few years ago after watching the film The Motorcycle Diaries, which chronicled Che Guevara's journey of self-discovery by depicting his travels across South America. His story lit a fuse inside me.

I was 28 years old and working in a brokerage office in London. My family had always expected me to be a businessman. But the job, and my life, just wasn't for me. I felt trapped. I had always been an extrovert masquerading as an introvert, secretly craving emotional connection with others yet simultaneously shunning exposure. I stayed in the shadows and behaved myself so that attention was not directed my way.

The film sparked a powerful urge to express my true nature, no matter what the cost. What better way to shed the expectations of others, I thought, than to cut all ties to my old life and become a kind of professional adventurer in a distant land? To keep from falling into old habits of isolation, I decided to travel in such a way that I would be forced to connect with others by relying on the kindness of strangers. I would allow myself $5 a day, which could be used for food, accommodations, or travel.

I traded in my luxury car and briefcase for a pair of walking shoes and a backpack and started a cross-country journey from Times Square. My aim was to reach the fabled Hollywood sign by relying on whatever social skills I could muster. A friend who ran a production company helped cobble together a small crew to film my travels. I later sold the show to Fox Reality and National Geographic International as the series Amazing Adventures of a Nobody.

If I had no money, my theory went, I would have to meet other people to help me. Otherwise, getting from A to B would be impossible. In my everyday life I had a car, cell phone, money, and other ways to bypass true human connection. I would be laid bare by my inability to use the normal tools associated with modern life and forced to find myself through others. I simply had to relate to people on a deeper level, or they would never have brought me into their homes or helped me with a meal. (Well, maybe some of them hoped we'd get them on TV.) I wasn't consciously aware of this at the time but what I was really doing was learning how to break out of my shell and experience new situations without fear or judgment...

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