But i wanted to share My story I Have had Bulimia for 6 years and Finally about a month ago i decided it was time To find me Again i started to to go back to the things i was good at and when i felt like i was failing i would tell myself you are good at this. and then i would feel it for the Moment and eventually i didn't have to say it anymore. I was doing good I was down to Only Purging Once a day and no binging then something Happened to change my whole life My Husband out of No where Who was On deployment told me he wanted a Divorce. His reason were My eating Disorder and a few Other small Issue's and I thought Maybe I would get so upset that all my work on over coming the eating disorder Would be Undone but what actually happened is that I felt like i went from bulimia to anorexia over night I could not eat I hurt to bad I had Absolutely no appetite but the thing was i wasn't thinking about how i looked or how much i weighed Foe once my my Was filled with more Important Things. the day after he told me i called to make an apt to talk to someone about the despair i was feeling all though it was a Friday and couldn't see me Until Tuesday. By Sunday I was eating again and I had no desire to binge or purge i even had a High Calorie meal from McDonald's. On Monday Night My husband Broke down and told me he had an affair with an EX girlfriend who has basically been the root of my eating disorder but i didn't realize it until Now he was feeling Guilty and said he was ashamed and Though he would rather have divorced me then ever found out what he did to me but he couldn't live with me or our Kids.
Now There is so much more to this story and reasons behind The fact that i am trying to forgive and work on my marriage But the moral of my story is that there is Hope, Eventually you will find it. Because if i could go through all of this and Know that its my time to get better and i was deep into this eating disorder weather or not My husband Changed his mind or not weather he had an affair or not It was my time to get better and i am getting there i got o therapy Once a week i see a psychiatrist once a month and when my husband gets back we will have marriage counseling its been over a month and there has been no Binging and no purging i am still a little scared of weight gain but i would rather have a few pounds on me then to continue my self hate and Misery.
I know that i am going to have set backs and i know i am going to feel like i have failed but i wont let the Eating Disorder Win anymore. I can control Who i am with Out it.
Thanks for Listening.
Now There is so much more to this story and reasons behind The fact that i am trying to forgive and work on my marriage But the moral of my story is that there is Hope, Eventually you will find it. Because if i could go through all of this and Know that its my time to get better and i was deep into this eating disorder weather or not My husband Changed his mind or not weather he had an affair or not It was my time to get better and i am getting there i got o therapy Once a week i see a psychiatrist once a month and when my husband gets back we will have marriage counseling its been over a month and there has been no Binging and no purging i am still a little scared of weight gain but i would rather have a few pounds on me then to continue my self hate and Misery.
I know that i am going to have set backs and i know i am going to feel like i have failed but i wont let the Eating Disorder Win anymore. I can control Who i am with Out it.
Thanks for Listening.
