Crazy Cat
Member
I'm not sure I'm in the right area for this post but since it was an anger issue, I'll pose it here for any advice.
Without getting too lengthy, here's the scenario:
I was trying to talk to one of my sisters today about an issue with my Mom's estate. A little background - this sister wants as much money as she can get - and has told other family members this. The majority of us (there are 8 of us) want another sister to get the house, sell her house and we'd split the proceeds of that house - even though it wouldn't sell for as much as Mom's house would.
I tried explaining to my sister about the major repairs the house needs to be put on the market, the market in general and that my other sister would take the house "as-is". On and on.
So anyway, the one I was talking to kept repeating over and over again how she wants the most money from my Mom's house, not the other house, etc. I (nicely) gave her my opinion that it isn't our money and never was, to which she almost had a coronary.
Long story short - after her talking about the money (which would only be a difference of maybe $5000 less than with Mom's house - probably even less than that), I said that it seemed to me that she was just waiting for Mom to die to get her hands on the money. Harsh? yeah, but that is exactly the message I was getting from her.
Her reaction was to SCREAM and I mean SCREAM at me, :hissyfit: scream at another sister who had nothing to do with it, storming out saying she's never coming back, etc. I should say she is 57 years old. I'm 45. I did not once raise my voice. I said I was trying to do the right thing, the thing our parents would want. My word....you would have thought I burnt down the vatican the way she was screaming! I have never in my life seen anyone act like that. Even the other sisters who were there said if I said something that harsh to them, they'd be angry, but they wouldn't react like a lunatic.
Now, my question is this: does her reaction tell a story she doesn't want to reveal?? I've heard that when you say something that makes another person cry (in normal conversation), you've hit the nail on the head and its the truth. Or does it mean she's got anger issues? She used to be an alcoholic and I know she's drinking again.
Sorry for the long post. Its 5am, I'm still shaken up by this whole thing, but I don't regret what I said. I regret it had to happen in Mom's house. :hair:
Without getting too lengthy, here's the scenario:
I was trying to talk to one of my sisters today about an issue with my Mom's estate. A little background - this sister wants as much money as she can get - and has told other family members this. The majority of us (there are 8 of us) want another sister to get the house, sell her house and we'd split the proceeds of that house - even though it wouldn't sell for as much as Mom's house would.
I tried explaining to my sister about the major repairs the house needs to be put on the market, the market in general and that my other sister would take the house "as-is". On and on.
So anyway, the one I was talking to kept repeating over and over again how she wants the most money from my Mom's house, not the other house, etc. I (nicely) gave her my opinion that it isn't our money and never was, to which she almost had a coronary.
Long story short - after her talking about the money (which would only be a difference of maybe $5000 less than with Mom's house - probably even less than that), I said that it seemed to me that she was just waiting for Mom to die to get her hands on the money. Harsh? yeah, but that is exactly the message I was getting from her.
Her reaction was to SCREAM and I mean SCREAM at me, :hissyfit: scream at another sister who had nothing to do with it, storming out saying she's never coming back, etc. I should say she is 57 years old. I'm 45. I did not once raise my voice. I said I was trying to do the right thing, the thing our parents would want. My word....you would have thought I burnt down the vatican the way she was screaming! I have never in my life seen anyone act like that. Even the other sisters who were there said if I said something that harsh to them, they'd be angry, but they wouldn't react like a lunatic.
Now, my question is this: does her reaction tell a story she doesn't want to reveal?? I've heard that when you say something that makes another person cry (in normal conversation), you've hit the nail on the head and its the truth. Or does it mean she's got anger issues? She used to be an alcoholic and I know she's drinking again.
Sorry for the long post. Its 5am, I'm still shaken up by this whole thing, but I don't regret what I said. I regret it had to happen in Mom's house. :hair:
