Is this the start of addiction?

[BluMac81]

I'm 26... have experienced prolonged stress for years now (probably normal for this age) and have anxiety and depression issues. Lately, I'm been finding myself constantly "looking forward to" the good feelings I get from either being drunk or doing some smokeless tobacco (which gives me a buzz). I drink about ever other day these days since I became unemployed (but going to college), and usually binge drink when I do. It used to be only twice a week i'd do that, but I have so much time now... Same with the tobacco dip...I go through about 4 cans a week. It might be because i feel like my life is getting worse and worse, the future more hopeless, and thoughts of suicide are starting to run through my head. So naturally i don't like myself or my life so i don't respect my health and end up drinking, dipping, eating junk food or not eating...
Something has to break the cycle...
I wish I wasn't alone.

 

[Lana]

Hi BluMac;

It sound like you're going through a rough patch right now. You're right, it is normal to experience some depression and/or anxiety about future, especially during uncertain times. However, it is troubling that the only solace you can find is at the bottom of a bottle or tobacco can. The problem with alcohol is that it tends to induce depression, so while it feels like you experience "the good feelings" when drunk, they actually make depression more acute when you sober up. That's probably why you find yourself drinking more and more. Tobacco is also not a good habit, but (as an ex-smoker), I do remember that drinking tends to promote smoking or use of tobacco....like 2 peas in a bad pod.

If I were to guess, I think part of the allure is that drunken state disables you and "forces" you to relax making seem like it aleviates stress. How about learning to relax without alcohol or tobacco? What about doing the exact same thing now except without use of substances?? That way you get the benefit without the damage.

I know that being in a tough spot is not fun and sometimes it's easier to blur the reality a bit, but that eventually clears up and the longer you wait to attend to yourself and life in general, the harder it gets and the "fixes" no longer work as well, putting you in a downward spiral. In addition, being between jobs, both habits are quite costly and can't be good for your finances. Those can be a good incentive to stop while you're ahead, get some rest, and deal with the real causes of stress that drive you to bad habits.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

BluMac, have you tried contacting your college medical center or counselling center to see if services are available to you as a student? Most colleges and universities have at least short-term services available to students at little or no cost.

 

[begonia]

I've been in recovery for 20 years now (April 4 was my anniversary). I'd first say that the Dr. is right about checking to see what services the school provides. That said, if you're worried about your drinking, that means it's a problem. It's not about how much you drink but about how it's interfering with your life or helping you to withdraw from life or is the only thing you look forward to. Whether or not it's an addiction right now doesn't have to be decided.

 

[Halo]

I don't mean to take this fftopic: but congratulations Begonia on your 20 years :yahoo:

 

[ladylore]

This is fftopic2: but I have to join in.

Congratulations Begonia! 20 yrs is great! :funky::cake: